Silent Hours

For a porn film, this has a relatively coherent storyline. A supposedly suave private detective possesses an inexplicable ability to cause women to become instantly 'in heat' if he so much as looks at them. Are we to believe he's as intriguing, captivating, and dangerous as James Bond? Actually, he looks more like the guy who tiled my bathroom. But in between all the sausage-hiding, there is a decent story. Just be prepared to dig deep for patience to find it.

Friends of mine watched this and loved it. I watched it on their recommendation just to be polite. I wanted to turn it off after the first sex scene because I felt like this was a B movie using porn actors to flesh it out, no pun intended.

The acting is appalling. The script is laughable. You know that when the lead actor touches blood on a dead body and then wipes it all over the front of his sweater things are only going to get worse... And they did.

As others here have mentioned it is so old fashioned. I mean I hate all these WOKE/PC for the sake of it movies but this is offensive. Utter amateur night dross. And now I have to go away and think of a way of telling me friends what I thought about this turkey without hurting their feelings!

Yes there is quite a lot of intercourse in this movie (that funnily enough seems to also exist as a 3 part series too) - but don't get too excited. Or maybe do, especially considering that those scenes probably will be the highlights for most - no pun intended.

The acting varies if you are being kind. If not you probably will feel every cringe worthy moment ... maybe you can be forgiving, maybe not. Maybe you'll care who did it, maybe you don't. All that does not take away from the fact that something is evidently missing here (no pun intended again) ... and it is not nudity or blood - if that plays a role in your "enjoyment" of this movie ... I may be a bit too nice when it comes to the rating, but that is me mostly. So be wary before you embark on this adventure, because it's likely that whether you predict who did it or not (I think it is quite obvious) or whether you'll even be able to find one likeable character in this ... the one thing that is almost certain: this won't make it to many top 5 lists or will be rewatched by many.

This movie is not very good and the main character is an intensely unlikeable, misogynistic sex pest with no redeeming qualities to balance it out. The sex scenes were truly dreadful and painful to endure. Watching this film made me angry, but I persevered until the bitter end. I'm nothing if not tenacious.

Without doubt the most atrocious film ever.

The "lead man", whoever he is cannot act his way out of a paper bag, the script is truly dreadful, verging on the illiterate and the direction is just comical in its direness.

Don't know when it was made but it's just so dated it looks like the camera work and sexual attitudes of the 1970s.

It goes from one dreadful sex scene to another, rather in the vein of a second rate porno made by a trainee floor manager.

There's some involvement with the Royal Navy, they must have died of embarrassment by now.

It said the release date was 2015, it must have been hidden for years since being made as everything is so dated, both in looks, history, attitudes.

The really awful thing too is that just when you hope and pray it's finished, it's hasn't, it goes bloody on.

Can only assume the director never worked again,please god!

Just don't waste three hours on this, it's AWFUL!