आर्मड

I'm not here to tell you "Armored" is Kubrickian, Hitchcockian or Fellini-esquire. Nope. Referenced directors are more like Don Siegel ("Charlie Varrick") and Walter Hill ("The Warriors"). Those two helmers didn't fool around with niceties like putting women in their movies. No skirts need apply. They unapologetically made guy movies. Guns, lots of guns. Men met violent death with a twitch of the jaw. Their movies were like a sap to the head. You want a friend? Get a dog.

"Armored" is so a guy movie. Dueling armored trucks? Bloody gunshot wounds? Exploding money? If that doesn't get the lizard part of your brain excited, then stay away.

At 88 minutes, "Armored" is all muscle without an ounce of fat. We meet six security guards who drive armored trucks, three per truck. The six, led by Matt Dillon, scheme up a fake hijack involving two trucks. Their mission one day is to deliver $42 million from the federal reserve (I think). The idea is to drive both trucks to a warehouse, stash the cash, then stage a hijack. Sure, the cops will suspect them, but if they stick together they'll get through it.

Trouble is, one of the six, played by Columbus Short, is a holdout. At first. But he faces eviction. And he's the guardian for his messed up younger brother. He needs cash bad.

Matt Dillon cajoles, pleads, persuades the holdout. No blood on anyone's hands. A clean getaway. All good, no bad. You'll be rich forever. Blue skies smiling at you ...

Right.

Everything goes to hell, of course. It's one damned thing after another and the stakes keep going up. And it almost all happens claustrophobically inside an abandoned warehouse somewhere in Los Angeles. In fact, the movie goes out of its way to project a backdrop of industrial urban decay. I happen to like industrial urban decay.

Kudos to Matt Dillon, who plays the top bad dog. He goes from charming to disappointed to frustrated to outraged to totally effing insane in the course of the movie. Love that guy.

Also, credit is due to the menacing, throbbing, blistering and totally sinister electronic soundtrack by John Murphy. I am guessing he's heard a few Tangerine Dream records.

Also, it's surprising that this is a PG-13 movie. I caught one — one! — f-bomb in this entire movie about violent tough-guy robbers. On some level, I like that. Take the kids.

The director is Nimrod Antal, a Hungarian who made a fine noir set in the Budapest subway system called "Kontroll." Screenwriter is an out-of-nowhere guy called James V. Simpson.

A lot of the people in this movie are just starting out. I am willing to bet the esteem given to this movie will rise as time goes on and these filmmakers advance in their careers.

This is one of those movies I will not say is good, nor bad. It is a very mediocre film. The cast is what, pretty much holds it together. I have surely seen better scripts, and story lines. The action scenes are decent. ...And, oh yeah....why would anyone freakin' care that Laurence Fishburne has gained weight??? Really?!?! That is pure, ignorant, moronic, delusional, immature reasons to not like a movie. Very petty. Get a life. It is really sad, to see that we, in general think like that. Larry is still a strong actor.

My overall reaction to this film, is to go see it as an 'early bird', Matinée, or wait for it on DVD.

The war veteran Ty Hackett (Columbus Short) is hired to work as security guard by the Eagle Shield Security where his old friend Mike Cochroone (Matt Dyllon) works. Ty is having financial difficulties after the death of his father and is raising his brother Jimmy (Andre Jamal Kinney) alone. He teams up with Mike's brother-in-law Baines (Laurence Fishburne) and their coworkers Quinn (Jean Reno), Palmer (Amaury Nolasco) and Dobbs (Skeet Ulrich). One night, Mike invites Ty to robber the two armored trucks that will transport forty-two million dollars. The reluctant Ty accepts after the promise of Mike that nobody would be hurt in the heist. They bring the trucks to an old mill and hide the money in a hole; however their operation is witnessed by a tramp. Baines shots the man with his shotgun and Ty decides to help him; but when Mike executes the homeless man, Ty locks himself inside a truck with half the amount.

"Armored" is an action movie about an almost perfect plan to heist two armored trucks by the security guards that should protect the transported money. The key character is the ambiguous Ty, a man that is facing financial difficulties in his private life that accept to participate in the heist but betrays his friends. Therefore, the hero of "Armored" is actually a traitor that is rewarded in the end. This unlikable character should have been better developed in the screenplay to give a better explanation for his despicable attitude (the betrayal). On the other hand, the naiveness of the five experienced men inviting a newcomer on the eve of the scheduled date of a heist sounds very unreasonable. It is impressive how fat Laurence Fishburne is. My vote is six.

Title (Brazil): "Assalto ao Carro Blindado" ("Heist of the Armored Car")

I was disappointed. I usually like heist movies but this one - "Armored" - was not smart, if you want a heist movie where they put together a great plan for the heist and there is tension to see if the plan will succeed and if they can get away with the money this is not that type of movie.

The heist plan in this film is one that was put together by dumb brutes and is not a focus of the movie. The movie is all about bloody action scenes with guns. Probably the biggest star in the movie is Laurence Fishburne, and he has put on a lot of weight and gotten fat, and none of the acting is all that good for any of the characters. But even as a dumb action movie it isn't anything special or worth seeing.

OK I'm not sure I can even fill out the 10 lines required for the review.

This is a totally wasted effort. Don't bother going to the movies. Heck don't even download this from Torrent.I think Jean Reno, Matt Dillon and Laurence Fishburne did this movie to get some Vegas money.

There is no story. Screenplay is jarring. Forget Direction. Sucks. I went in thinking I'll get something like 'The Bank Job' or 'The Insider' but apparently bank robbers are getting dumber by the day.

If you want a thriller, just sit and home and watch Heat all over again. This is not worth the effort.