Grizzly Rage

I watched this because I had a free movie pass. Even for free I felt cheated by this lousy excuse for a scary movie. The bear is the best actor in the film and there are not any decent gore shots. The dialogue is dumb and the story line is pretty unbelievable. I don't know if this is going to be on SciFi (like all sucky movies are) but don't watch it unless you are uber bored. I can usually sit through some pretty inane movies but this one was really bad. The ending is probably the biggest losing part of the story. You have been warned. I just hope others don't waste their time like I did on this piece of crap. I probably shouldn't blame the actors. This kinda reminded me of one of those "revenge of the ..." movies that got popular back in the 80's and that we all overdosed on.

This movie is brutal from start to finish. Obviously the writer/director don't necessarily believe in the old adage of "anything worth doing is worth doing well". The director has no knowledge of bear behavior or safety. Which you should have if your going to make a movie with a bear. First of all you cant just hide around a tree/corner from a bear, cause bear's have a keen sense of smell. Second, the amplified bear sounds and the shots of the bear at least initially were horrible. The night scenes...you cant hardly see anything, not to mention some of the other camera work. And the ending is brutal...well why would it be any different than the rest of the movie. I cant believe that this movie made it past the editing phase.

And you will too if you see this, since the bear is probably the best actor, followed by the bear cub (and he was dead).

A bunch of dimwitted "Darwin Award" winners decide to take themselves out of the gene pool and get in a car, and (by montage sequence) travel several hundred miles down to some trashy looking enclosed private property. Smashing their way through barriers the "fun" begins. How they knew this place existed, why they thought it would be cool to go there, or why this movie was ever made are just some of the questions never answered. They mow down a bear cub and destroy their radiator, all the while howling and screaming along with their screeching tires.

Mercifully, the mommy bear comes along to exact revenge, and none too soon. She can't off these idiots fast enough, even though the footage of the bear is obviously some unused documentary footage from Animal Planet. Like all low budget movies, you'll know who's next to get it from the spliced in stock footage. The cabin scene is the only scene that was remotely well done, but then it's back to stupid behavior by the next victim who leaves the safety of the cabin when he hears the bear growling.

Moronic.

I first saw Grizzly Rage, like so many other Big Creature Eating Attractive People films late one night on the Sci Fi channel with a large group of friends while the majority of us were downing sizable amounts of alcohol. As the sub-par Fast and the Furious style credits sequence shot past with a low rent nu-metal band playing in the background, I was still reasonably sober but could feel the effects of two purple nightmares (look them up) taking effect and knew that soon, I would be swimming in a haze of my own creation. For the sake of a cheap laugh or two, I found a pen and paper and wrote down all the things I learned from this movie. The results are as follows:

1. Bears pursue blood vendettas. 2. Americans graduate from high school at the average age of 24. 3. Bears can push land rovers over. 4. Being torn limb from limb by ferocious, man eating bears is nature's way of punishing you for minor traffic violations committed in your youth. 5. Girls tops can magically sew themselves back together after being ripped open. 6. Eating toxic waste makes bears bigger, stronger, more intelligent and far more bloodthirsty than average, rather than the predicted scientific outcome of causing malignant tumors and killing them. 7. Dressing like an extra from a Vanilla Ice video is no guarantee of survival. 8. You can get attacked by a bear, rolled off a cliff in a car, thrown spine first onto a bear trap and spend all day battling for survival on a sun parched strip of mid-western wilderness and still have better skin and hair than Andie McDowell. 9. Bears respond to sass. 10. Smashed land rovers will still run for miles if rolled down a small hill to gather momentum.

In other words folks, this is not great. In fact it's terrible. CGI blood, stock footage, awful characters and death scenes so pathetic they don't even make a group of five young men, drunk off their heads on aftershock concoctions laugh. Avoid.

Yeah when I first saw the commercials for this movie I was like. Oh God this movie will be boring. I was right. It starts out with four college students. (All who look like they are in there late 20's) driving down the road obviously fast forwarded listening to awful music. They break into a park and run over a baby bear. Soon they are followed by its mother. Every time she kills someone animated blots of blood splatter. And I don't even want to comment on the car which over heats, flips, and amazingly enough still runs.

The acting was so bad I rooted for the bear the entire time. I can't even believe that they made and aired this junk.

Rating 1 out of 10