Deadlands: The Rising

I sat down to watch this movie, with my brother. Together, we are NOTORIOUS fans of any and all zombie movies. However, I was almost instantly let down. From the opening shot with some unknown woman writing in her journal about a mysterious man who ruined the planet or somesuch, into the overly pretentious 11 minute opening credits....... OK, I digress.. but seriously, who cares about the radio stations still working and the 2 fat guys who drive around for a while mumbling. I don't have any idea what they were blathering on about and I somehow doubt it would have improved the scene much if I'd bothered to turn the volume up to a level which would have made the background music cause my ears to bleed. Wwhile I'm on the subject of music...it was there when it shouldn't have been and STOPPED the moment it needed to be there.. music while talking and none during 'action'. I absolutely despise when somebody reviews a movie that they did not even watch through, but *I* could not finish this movie.. for only the third time ever ( the first, being the pitiful remake of Rollerball, and second being that miserable piece of rancid feces, Freddy Got Fingered).

We got tired of all the non-stop "dialogue" and ended up fast forwarding in minor one-minute increments to see if it would ever end.. 30 minutes into the movie there was no sign of substance. So we took a five minute jump and were.... rewarded... with a blurry slow motion shot of people chewing on what appeared to be bloody eels, in a seriously unconvincing manner. The great John Romero did much much better with FRIED CHICKEN.. nothing bloody.. nothing weird....simple FRIED CHICKEN.

Another leap revealed something that seemed to approach an action scene but was lacking in background music (mentioned above) and we simply shut the "film" off. I went back later to try again... and still couldn't. Everyone's lines were forced, their every motion was filled with stagefright... or possibly too much drug usage. Seriously, the little kid looked high. For crying out loud guys, you should have at least watched your own film and realized that you BADLY needed to do another take. Heck, even other indie filmmakers have the intellect to know when they are making an unwatchable scene.

I'm not even going to be able to be polite here and say something re-assuring like "good first effort'.... these guys just don't have the talent to make movies. I'm aware they also have a history of attacking reviewers.. have at it, guys.. it won't change how simply awful this is. You're not "indie filmmakers" you're just a bunch of kids with a camera. This "film" is acceptable for an 8th grade show and tell session; nothing more.

First off this is a bro film, a bro his buddy's lots of buddies a camera and a script. Starting off I don't know where the movie stats they have this big half hour monologue about the war and what caused the zombies but its just a bunch of fat people going hunting no zombies. Finally we see police and soldiers goateed hab shab uniformed sent out to protect the shelter. Well didn't the screenwriter have a buddy in the army or something who could've added some jargon? Even Tucker MAX (I hope they served beer in hell/assholes finish first) bragged about his soldier buddies calling people cock-holsters. Here the police preach to the soldiers about deadly force. No soldiers call it R.O.E rules of engagement; the police call it use of force. Anyhow the zombie make up is black and white. The movie fails to deal with man dealing with man during the outbreak its just fat zombies running around. I did like the camera work, felt like you were confused and in the middle of it.

For some reason I went into Deadlands wanting to like it, not sure why and unfortunately I simply couldn't.

A hyper low budget zombie effort this is the first part of a trilogy and is directed by, written by and starring Gary Ugarek.

It's your pretty standard stuff, an incident occurs, zombies appear and people do their best to survive. Trouble is it never really gets going, there is no actual story. What you'll be watching for little over any hour is what happens in the first 15-20 minutes of your average zombie movie.

Now as you'd imagine it looks and sounds cheap (Because it is) but somehow they make the best of it here. It's amazing what even the slightest bit of talent behind the camera can accomplish.

In no way is Deadlands anything even remotely resembling a good film however they certainly get points for effort. Onto the sequel soon I suppose.

The Good:

Above par soundtrack

You can tell effort was made

The Bad:

Looks/sound cheap and nasty

Dreadfully paced

First it was Pittsburgh, then Louisville, Ky, and now Baltimore, MD has fallen to the army of the dead in Gary Ugarek's Deadlands: The Rising.

When George Romero gave us Night of the Living Dead it was a type of horror movie never seen before, taking the zombie monster and converting it into a cannibalistic killer capable of no emotion or remorse, making it one of the most terrifying monsters in cinema history. Today countless filmmakers have copied or tried to mimic the zombie paradox, some have succeeded and some have flat out failed, but every now and again, in the countless indie zombie horror films, a diamond in the rough that peaks out to grab the attention of zombie film lovers the world over.

Deadlands is that diamond. Although very low budget, and with flaws in hand, it has a great 80's movie vibe with a realistic feel and some nice gore, not too mention scenes building suspense are done quite well and the films score is eerily effective and felt in the vein of John Carpenter's musical styling.

Zombies are what people want and they will eventually get once they progress through the story of Deadlands. The films plays the angle of an average day turning into the nightmare from hell and although the acting leaves a lot to be desired you can easily see the direction Ugarek was taking when constructing the films story. One thing I want too mention as well is how Ugarek shares a similar trait as Romero, they both like to give the audience a little political commentary in their films. Romero's Land of the Dead had a more in your face approach with the political sub plot whereas Ugarek kept his more subtle and he played on the events surrounding not only 9/11 but hurricane Katrina as well.

Deadlands single biggest problem is a very slow start. The first zombie did not appear on screen until the 22:00 mark, but once the dead begin to walk and the blood begins to flow this is where Deadlands takes off and soars. Deadlands is also a little on the short side. The films total running time is about 62:56 seconds, but the actual film and story end at about the 57:00 mark leaving nearly 6 minutes for the closing credits, which has one of the catchiest medleys of the entire films score remixed into one song.

I cannot close of this review without giving props to the make-up department. Deadlands didn't go gore crazy, but what carnage does exist is done effectively and on the meager funds Ugarek mentions in the commentary make-up FX supervisor Stephanie Petagno knows how to make the money stretch.

Deadlands is probably one of the better indie zombie efforts I have seen in a long time and I feel it is up there with the big boys. If the crew of this film can pull this off for less than $20,000 imagine what they could do with $20,000,000.

7 out of 10

The video and audio quality is sub-par. To me, it felt like a home video reminiscent of something you'd see taken at the relatives place on Thanksgiving Day.

The acting is amateurish, forced, and seemingly barely rehearsed. The screenplay/dialog is poorly written.

You just know a movie is going to blow when 50% of the opening credits go to special FX techs, the dude who cast "extras" for zombies, and the writer/director/editor is credited with about a half of a dozen other billets.

Usually, I'd say that a movie this horrible is worth watching for the simple entertainment of pointing and laughing at how bad it is... but the whole thing from start to finish is mind numbingly dull.