The Wicker Man

A bad movie is a bad movie but a bad remake is something else entirely. This film doesn't just do a bad job of retelling the original story it takes everything that was good about it and replaces it with a witless and disjointed story.

Nicolas Cage is well cast as a man addicted to some kind of over the counter drugs. I was sick to death of his muttering and dopey face within about five minutes, you might find his routine wearing thin a little faster or slower depending on your tolerance. I think he might have done a little too much preparation for his role. Watching Nicolas Cage mumble his way through the script is quite painful at times, like seeing an elderly dog trying to chase a postman on arthritic legs and not understanding why he can't quite do it anymore.

The original story was quite chilling but here it's all kind of a joke. There's something really repulsive about a director remaking a film when they clearly haven't taken the time to understand the original. The plot is weaker than you would believe without seeing it and the whole war of the sexes thing is just not interesting. The director of this film should be forcibly prevented from remaking any more films, this film is a big fat insult to a classic movie and a sign of how cynical and artless Hollywood has become. Sad times.