Meat Pie

I made the mistake of watching portions of this in 2007 and it still haunts me. I know he needed money for a Playstation but I still can't believe a young Ed Kavalis would stoop so low. This movie left me walking away feeling dirty and hollow inside. Also, the director is a slumlord. Marsland Motors.

Barely watchable, possibly one of the worst films ever made. To the director I would say: get a real job.

It's not even funny bad like some old or dated cult flicks, it's just truly awful. Poorly crafted, derivative, unoriginal, amateurishly produced. Also borrows liberally from SBS TV's Pizza. If you are going to appropriate ideas, why not at least rip off something good?

I've seen first year film student projects that are far better than this waste of space.

One of the worst films I've ever seen by far.

You can watch the whole thing on YouTube, but I bet you won't sit through the first minute.

It should be illegal to make a film this bad. Watching it was like having a pencil shoved in my eye and it being swirled around, then having a bunch lit of cigarettes put out all over my body. But other than that it was OK.

I feel this way and I was getting paid while I was watching it at work. They say it is like American pie. This, my friend, is nothing like American Pie. American Pie had a plot, this was just a bunch of idiots doing stupid sh#$* on camera with no rhyme or reason at all.

Anyone thinking about watching this movie, just know, it is 89 min of your life you will never get back.

Recipe for Meat Pie... Ingredients: Some incompetent film-making hobbyists, grand ideas blended with total delusion, crude jokes stolen from the nearest schoolyard playground, nonsensical material that's just plain unfunny... and a whole lot of egos, each convinced that he is in charge and an "expert".

Method: After writing woefully inept script, reject feedback from people who actually have a clue about writing. Remain convinced that this is "commercial hit" material. After unsuccessfully trying to recruit pure talent such as John Cleese, Bryan Brown and Michael Caton, or celebrities such as Steve Irwin, cast some washed-up comedians and former reality TV contestants. Cluelessly throw together a film with a camera from the local pawnbroker and await mocking from anyone unfortunate enough to catch a glimpse of the garbage

I'm all for freedom of expression, and would never deny someone the right to independently get a message across to film audiences. However this movie, an attempt at independent comedy, seriously stands in the way of other people having the chance to express themselves. It also demeans just about every group in society with its feeble attempts at humour, and insults viewers in the process. Seriously, who thinks audiences are going to be amused by jokes about masturbation, menstruation, penis transplants and various racist and homophobic slurs? The Australian film industry is struggling to find an identity, and, as much as I admire anyone with a mission to get some Australian product out there, films like this will only damage the industry's already-low reputation and stop real films with real messages getting the chance they deserve.