Attack of the Sabretooth

I remember watching ATTACK when it first came out and caught it again recently. The sci fi channel has run worse, but not by much. A shameless ripoff of Jurassic Park, ATTACK substitutes sabertooth cats for dinosaurs. And they are on the loose, devouring as many extras as possible. The CGI is pretty bad, and closeups of prosthetic cat heads are laughable. We get some gore, which helps a little. Wait until you see how the mad scientist who started this whole mess gets it. Other than Robert Carradine, who has very little to do, the cast is unknown. Apparently this was shot in Fiji. Nice work if you can get it. Reminds me of all those low-budget monster STVs that were popular in the 80s and 90s.

There's not a whole lot to be said about 'Attack of the Sabretooth.' The most basic plot synopsis immediately informs that it wants to cash in on the popularity of 'Jurassic Park.' Unlikely wildlife attractions at a theme park get loose and attack characters that have names of one sort or another, and who are present at the park for one reason or another. This particular rendition of the narrative concept gives us no motive to learn about or try to remember who these characters are, so we don't.

Do the titular sabretooth tigers look convincing? Not really. You could do worse. But then, their appearance seems so half-hearted, so jarringly distinct from the scenery around them, that one has to imagine that the animators were instructed to do the bare minimum. So, job well done, I guess.

The most notable and memorable thing about the movie is the final death scene. Just as the climax of 'Jurassic Park' takes place in its visitor center, seeing the ruin of the skeletons on display, so is 'Attack of the Sabretooth' capped off with the chief building's kingly decor tumbling down. Except in this case, the scene has the appearance of having been animated on a Nintendo 64, as it wouldn't look out of place in a Super Mario game on that system.

'Attack of the sabretooth' is what happens when a film is green-lighted with no budget. The actors don't seem to be trying a great deal; I'm reminded of my own award-worthy performance in a short that some friends and I made in college. The animators and everyone else involved in the production clearly did their job, as directed, with what they had to work with. And that's a wrap.

None of this is to say that 'Attack of the sabretooth' isn't entertaining, as long as you know exactly what you're getting into. But one view will be more than enough for even the most excitable fan of B-movies.

Where to begin? the special effects should be named special defects, When the director shouted "action" I guess he also indicated to the actors to carry out the worst performance they could think of. Maybe he was annoyed with the producers and wanted to make sure that they would not recover a single cent out of their investment and that the work would be a case study of how not to make movie. Or maybe he hated art school and wanted to be an accountant but his family did not let him.

The only thing that is sure that whoever employs him in the future is because its in love with him (so its objectivity jumped through the window) or because he changed its name and deleted all past previous references.

I was expecting little from Attack of the Sabretooth, and got very little. Even with its major problems somehow it is not SyFy's worst or among them. The only real redeeming quality is Robert Carradine, who has been better but at least tries his best with bad lines and a clichéd character. The rest of the acting is awful, especially from the teenagers, ranging from bland to ridiculously over-the-top. In all honesty though they are not helped by the terribly stilted writing which does nothing to develop the characters or make us care about their situation, and how stereotypically and annoyingly their characters are written, at the end of the day you don't give a toss about these people. The story is also a mess, predictable, dully paced and also derivative of Jurassic Park but without the excitement and thrills. And visually Attack of the Sabretooth looks very cheap, with choppy editing and effects so bad and fake that you can't help but laugh. There is a lot of gore, but excessive and cheap-looking at that, part of the reason why the death scenes seemed so poorly done as well the lack of any real sense of terror or suspense. Overall, a really bad movie but despite its many problems I've seen worse. 2/10 Bethany Cox

In the Fiji islands, the greedy and unscrupulous owner of the Valalola Resort Primal Park invites investors and guests for an opening party of his compound composed of hotel and zoo aiming to find partners for his discoveries. When a bunch of college smalltime thieves puts a virus in the security system to participate in a scavenger hunt, the greatest attractions of the zoo – sabretoothes from the prehistoric age developed from DNA found in fossils – escape, killing the hosts and guards for pleasure.

The incredibly lame and cheap "Attack of the Sabretooth" is one of the worst movies I have recently seen. The characters are awful and not funny or pleasant and the story is a terrible Jurassik Park rip-off with a bad collection of clichés. Basically all the lines and situations are poor and stupid, but the winner is when the guard explains that the sabretoothes are bulimic and like to kill for pleasure. My vote is three.

Title (Brazil): "O Ataque do Dente de Sabre" ("The Attack of the Sabretooth")