Skarecrow

I bought this movie on a whim because the cover looked good and thought I'd be seeing a legit horror movie. When I put this in and it looked like it was filmed on a VHS tape with "actors" who were comically reading their lines.

Literally, this has to be the most godawful piece of cinematic crap in history.

This movie makes Troll 2 seem like the Godfather in comparison.

It truly is amazing how every single thing about this movie is so perfectly bad. You couldn't make a movie this bad if you tried.

Stay away from this movie unless you are into some sort of self torture thing. I mean there are conceivably worse things you could do with your time, but its hard to imagine what that might be. If it comes down to watching this movie and being sodomized by a rabid goat, well, I might go with the goat.

I couldn't spoil this piece of crap if I wanted to. After watching Dark Harvest 1 I thought "this has got to be the worse movie ever made" then I watched Dark Harvest 2 and that made 1 seem a little better. Then I watched Dark Harvest 3 or tried too. The only thing I have to say is "when is this going to end?" Very bad acting and really bad special effects the only good thing about this movie was the boob shot. Don't waste your time of money on this piece of crap... And now I have to write 3 more lines to get this to submit. I was going to sing a song but I can't think of any right now. But the movie finally ended (though it had an ending that might mean they are going to make another one of these)

(2005) Dark Harvest 3- Skarecrow HORROR

Great looking poster and that's not saying much for this straight-for-rental horror flick like it was made as a quick class project since it was filmed via cam corder with some second rate acting and body doubles were used, about teenage redneck along with his friends deciding to visit an isolated cabin for the weekend, unsuspecting that a curse was made years earlier! The last remaining relative wakes a planted scarecrow by accidentally splashing it with his girlfriends blood by smacking her for the first time- how convenient! And of course, this Scarecrow starts slashing everyone in plain view sight. There's also supposed to be a surprise near the end which some should be able to figure out at the beginning.

OK i gave this a three A three! It deserves only one star no questions asked.

If your going to look at the movie seriously and take it as a legit B-Horror movie than yes it will get one star. But i believe it is apparent within the first minutes of the movie what we are dealing with is a piece of crap.

With this movie me and the buddy i was watching it with could of turned it off and put on something more "Hollywood" but instead we just decided to rip this whole movie apart from start to finish. We laughed so many times it was almost if i was watching a comedy.

The acting is terrible..... The effects and death sequences are so bad.... The Story complete crap.....

But the fact they are trying to make a serious horror movie..Priceless!

The most memorable part for me is when two of the characters are walking in a supposed "dark basement" which is clearly lit, and they pretend to not be able to see bumping into bones hanging from the ceiling bahahahaha just terrible.....

So if you want to laugh at how crappy this movie is, along with the fact it was made in 2004 than see this movie....

Wait why am i writing so much? no one knows about this movie...i doubt anyone will even read this hahahaha.

Dark Harvest 3: Scarecrow: 1 out of 10: In Einstein's theory of relativity time is of the perspective of the one that views time. (Or so I've heard) In other words this movie feels a lot longer that an hour and change. Even on fast-forward (And you will be reaching for that fast forward button) it clocks in somewhere around eternity.

If you are familiar with Lionsgate's own version of Project Greenlight (This is where they buy a home movie but a fancy cover on it and sneak it into the horror section of your local Wal-Mart) you will not be surprised by the complete and utter lack of entertainment value contained within.

The line reading (I refuse to call it acting) is uniformly awful. This is a collection of deadbeat dads and strippers pretending to be in a movie between cans of Schlitz. The camera work is drunken father shooting vacation film quality and while the special effects are okay the scariest effect is the breast augmentation scars in the nude scene.

The story is awful, the sets are from a haunted Halloween put on by ADHD middle school students and once again the line reading (remember this is not acting anymore than sinking to the bottom of a pool is swimming) is distracting beyond mere words. Avoid.