Chupacabra Terror

Otherwise known as Chupacabra: Dark Seas this notable Scyfy Original type isn't as bad as I expected.

Starring industry veteran John Rhys-Davies and the annoyingly annoying Chelan Simmons it tells the story of a cryptozoologist that captures a chupacabra and smuggles it on board a luxury cruise liner as means of transporting it. I'm sure I don't need to say anything more for you to understand exactly how the movie plays out.

Unexpectedly it did go in a couple of directions I didn't expect. Though the cast are lackluster the character development is solid, the practical effects are above par and overall it's really not that bad.

On the flipside however the cgi is poor, it's cliched to hell as you'd expect and did I mention how annoying Chelan Simmons is? Seriously, that girl has no place in the movie industry whatsoever.

Take your brain out stuff, not good by any stretch of the imagination but for what it is there's considerably worse out there.

The Good:

John Rhys-Davies

Passable practical effects

Fairly decent characters

Good setting

The Bad:

Needless animal death

Poor cgi

Chelan Simmons

Dr. Pena (Giancarlo Esposito), a "crypto-zoologist" (fancy term for one of those self-deluded losers who likes to study extremely rare - read: nonexistent - animals) and his crew of hunters manage to trap a Chupacabra, a big, scaly, elusive fast-moving beast. To get it to the mainland, they smuggle it on a Grecian cruise ship and some idiots open up the crate containing it despite being told specifically not to. I guess the strange growling noises coming from inside weren't a good enough deterrent either. The monster then does the monster thang; running around biting chunks out of various passengers until the ship's captain (John Rhys-Davies), a square-jawed special agent pretending to be an insurance salesman for some reason (Dylan Neal), a squeaky-voiced blonde Tai Bo instructor (Chelan Simmons), a bunch of guys with machine guns and others try to stop it. The main victims (who I think are supposed to be the comic relief but it's hard to tell) are an old rich bitch (Paula Shaw) with a yippy terrier and a snobby effete gold-digger (David Millbern). Apparently the monster can be knocked out with a single tranquilizer dart, but can live through dozens of bullet hits. The Chupacabra design is acceptable (though unoriginal) but the rest of the movie is devoid of suspense, surprise or interest. A boring Sci-Fi Channel "original" movie; they've made dozens of movies just like this with nearly interchangeable characters and plots, but with slight alterations on the creature. Enough already!

I didn't know what to expect when I began watching Chupacabra on the Sci-Fi Channel, I've heard of the mythical creature through folklore, however after only a few moments I just couldn't pull myself away. Sure it was a Saturday night cheesy monster movie, but I wasn't really looking for it to be any more than that. As far as some of the special effects go, the design of the creature was definitely unique and different, I just wish the CG enhancement would have been better. I have seen a couple other versions of Chupacabra movies before and this one certainly had the best looking creature of them all. Kudos to the FX guys and Mr. Sheppard. Hope Sci-Fi replays this movie again so I can set my VCR and add this to my collection or maybe hope for a DVD release. All in all I enjoyed the movie very much and hope to see more creature movies come out of Regent Entertainment and Sci-Fi....

Without John Rhys-Davies, I have to admit that this would never even register on my movie-meter. But in spite of that single fact, this is not a bad little thriller, considering the low budget, the low quality effects, the stiff acting and the Sci Fi Channel aspects. The blood effects are very convincing, and the Chupacabra actually looks realistic... regardless of what you think a Chupacabra looks like this is one good-looking Chupacabra.

Aside from the positives, this runs kind of like Kolchak: The Night Stalker (Darren McGavin, remember?) meets the Love Boat, but in spite of the ultimate cheese of this work, it still holds something resembling a plot, and actually attempts to gain your respect while making you laugh and roll your eyes.

As conflicted as this work is, I still managed to find some enjoyment herein. Maybe you will, too.

It rates a 5.2/10 on the Made 4 TV Scale.

It rates a 4.1/10 on the Movie Scale from...

the Fiend :.

Yet another bland Sci-Fi movie, this time involving a monster that is immune to bullets but not Tae-bo. Some of it is well-done, and the Chucacabra does look scary. But I thought the most interesting, and slightly disturbing, element was the human victims... they are immortal! They can't be killed! At one point, the Chucacabra tears a guy in half, leaving his intestines spilling all over the room, and he WAKES UP after supposedly dying! Yes, all of sudden he comes to, sees his guts on the floor, and starts screaming. How he managed to wake up from a cozy nap with 50% of his body missing is beyond me.

Also note-worthy is the man who gets his throat ripped out by the Chupacabra, and lays on the floor moaning. The other characters can do nothing to help him, and leave him to die. Well, about 10 minutes later, this guy gets up and starts staggering around the hall! It's like "Night of the Living Dead!" Other than the Victims That Wouldn't Die, however, the rest of this isn't too interesting. It is pretty silly and formulaic. I would only recommend this to hardcore B-movie fans.

4/10 stars.