Razorteeth

This series of frames (I cannot force myself to call it "movie," sorry) is appalling, mesmerizing, unbelievable... You can't miss it!!

If you feel like spending one evening by laughing uncontrollably at your TV screen, this is the movie for you. Don't look for mundane film-things like a story, character development or a satisfying climax - those things are left to the amateurs. This is beyond any possible human comprehension.

Here's what I think the movie is about: there are some US Army ships, a couple of choppers (stock footage filmed by the writers while on vacation, or so is said in the commentary), then a bunch of scuba divers find in a submarine some frozen piranha in Ziplock bags, there is probably a plane with a lot of smoke and a crash-landing in a lake. I think. Suddenly, the piranha are free in the lake, which has alternatively some of the murkiest and cleanest water I've ever seen. Then something happens, and the movie is over (after 1 hour and 10 minutes).

Superb!! You will appreciate the complete ineptitude of setting up a story of some sort, the great locations used for the flick (the hotel by the lake has a great lobby... not!!), the Agent sent (presumably) by the Government, who seems to have the I.Q. of a beet, and everything else, including a score made by someone who was clearly watching another movie.

Do not miss this movie if you want to have a ball with your friends and you enjoy talk back at films. It's a riot!!

Have a good laugh on the Polonia Brothers. As is all of their films, this is a micro budgeted stink fest. This is probably the best I have seen from them though. I admit there is a guilty pleasure for me to watch these films made in PA by these brothers as it makes me feel like anyone can make a movie for $12. Compared to their other flicks, this one is a treat. If you can stand watching really really really bad movies and laugh at them, u might enjoy this. If you like their other stuff this one will look a lot better than most of their movies. No puppets and the fish look pretty decent. Of course it is full of bad acting and plot holes, but hey-it's the Polonia Brothers! Oh and of course there is a casio synth soundtrack so as not to disappoint.

Flying dead piranhas. A resort that doesn't require guest registration or credit card. An Alien rip-off when a razor tooth exits a guy's chest while sitting in an outhouse. The same outhouse guy who keeps his dog on a short leash attached to his belt for no obvious reason. I've never seen a Polonia Brothers movie, so have nothing to compare it to. Now I'm on a quest to find more. This one is on Amazon Prime Video.

At least the women actually were clothed while swimming, unless I missed a nude scene. I'm not sorry I watched though. It gave me something to do while using my weights at home on a non-gym day.

Well, well well. This film has no frills, no polished edges - butsomehow it gets away with it. The acting is a little rough in places. A few strange bits . . . Even the person who knew about the "killer piranhas" still decided to go into the lake. Every victim seemed to put up no struggle, or even made much noise. The "Agent" that was sent to investigate the whole situation wore trainers (sneakers, to any septics who might be reading). The great thing though is that in spite of all these minor niggles, the film really hits the spot. The plot is a bit dodgey, very unlikely but really likable. The only thing that I think lets the film down is there are no characters that you really want to "win the day" and get out alive. The victims don't last long enough for you to like and the reluctant hero is just a bit too reluctant. Very similar to the Piranha series of films in the 70's and 80's. Definitely worth watching.

No spoilers here, because your experience is already spoiled from the moment you begin to watch the film. There can't be an accurate rating for this film because you can't measure a rating that low. This garbage was shot on video and is horrible, horrible, horrible. The acting, if you call it that was beyond painful, more painful than the so called pain that was inflicted on the hapless victims of the piranha. You could do better with your own video camera and friends that would work for free. Very amateur and very lame. Watch only if you must see this travesty for yourself. Rent the original "Piranha" instead. Check please.