The Anna Nicole Show

I recently took a bet from a friend that I couldn't watch the first season DVD set of The Anna Nicole Show all in one night. The bad news is I won this bet. I don't enjoy watching a mentally unstable or heavily medicated woman go about her life. I didn't enjoy her trip to Chipendale's. Nor her goin to see "Puppetry of the Penis". I could've lived without seeing Anna's toothless white trash cousin flashing multiple times AND I had no desire to see Margerette Cho make out with Anna. (although I always had Cho pegged as being like that). Oh did I mention that the DVDs are uncensored, so all of the above possibly scarred me for life. Also on the commentary for the Christmas special Anna herself says some of it is faked by the E! crew. My Grade: F

I've seen most episodes of the "The Anna Nicole Show" and I think it's trashy, dumb, and entertaining. It's appeal to me is that it's about a woman who has absolutely nothing to do but wait on her money from her deceased ex-husband, while she concentrates on daily chores like going to the dentist(how TRAUMATIC!),decorate her home to her own "foo foo" tastes with an interior decorator who sucks up to her, and order her ever-present assistant and attorney around. The last show I saw Anna and crew needed a break from things so badly they traveled to Las Vegas for gambling, strippers, drinking, and food. Anna and her attorney, Howard K. Stern, were getting wild, cuddling with the strippers and rubbing all over each other. Even at a buffet,(she was hungry after all that activity) Anna does not serve herself - her attorney and assistant guess what she wants, and then are surprised that Anna wanted something healthy like a salad and forgot to get it. She still has a beautiful face, and has gotten quite heavy, but it seems to not bother her unless someone brings it up - she is happy to run around in belly shirts and exotic/revealing clothing. As long as she's happy, everything is fine. She's got a short temper, the patience of a 5 year old, and goes from speaking clearly to sounding like she is spaced out on something. It takes all kinds I guess, and she certainly is one of a kind. She is outrageous, to say the least. I think it's kind of entertaining to watch, really. I can't wait for the next episode where Anna takes her pooch, "Sugar Pie" to a pet psychic!

I'm not sure why I enjoy this, because as other people have said, there certainly are grosser and more outlandish things on TV. These shows really are about nothing. One is about Anna looking for a house. Period. Another is about Anna having an eating contest with her attorney. Period. Another is about Anna going for a driving test. Period. And of course all have a sub-plot involving flambouyant Bobby Trendy decorating her house (which never seems to get done). I guess it all boils down to the fact that it is just amazing to watch someone who was so glamorous, sexy and unattainable turn into someone who doesn't care that she has crawled under a table and gotten her butt stuck between two legs! Her speech is almost always slurred so badly that it is very hard to believe she is not on pain killers or muscle relaxers and booze most of the time. But I love her!! I think her "Screw it" attitude is great! She just does not seem to care about anything! She knows there are cameras following her around at all times but thinks nothing of chowing down on Doritos and Stawberry Quik! I really feel sorry for her 2 assistants, Howard and Kim, who come across as being very desperate and secretly in love with her - both putting up with her childish temper tantrums. In one episode, Anna threw a fit and cursed out Kim because they were playing "Punch-Buggy" and Anna was insisting that the "new Volkswagon Beetles" do not count while Kim said that they did. So Anna got really angry - not "kidding around angry" but cursing her out and truly being p***ed off!! I guess Kim really doesn't have any other choice than to put up with it since she has Anna's face tattooed all over her body. Regardless of how heavy she is though, Anna still has a beautiful face, probably one of the most beautiful faces in the world. And it is refreshing to see a beautiful celebrity truly being herself, no matter how stupid and childish, rather than taking on the same boring mundane personality that is expected of them and that most other celebrities take.

This section of the review is written for Anna:

Hi Anna. I wanted to like this Anna, I did. I watch it. But I is bored. You do nothing funny. You silly. You yell. And you dumb-dumb. Please stop this Anna. My eyes hurt like boo boo when I see you. I go watch Osbournes instead...

For the IMDb readers:

I can understand the logic: put a famous person (or family) in the limelight and rake in the bucks. It worked with the Osbournes so what went wrong here? ANNA NICHOL SMITH went wrong. So what if she is fat and retarded, she's famous right? It's gotta work right? Wrongo! If all it took was stupidity and obesity, I would be doing shows on about have the people I know. The problem is: She is boring, just like half the people I know.

Anna is also on drugs most of the time, which takes her from the blond airhead level of intelligence to the downright retarded one. But hey! Ozzy seems like he's on drugs ALL the time too (even though he isn't) but he has wit and charm and the ability to deliver some terrific one-liners. Anna doesn't. Anna is just dull and pathetic. If you don't believe me, go watch for yourself.

Have you seen her recently?! Anna Nicole is now the spokesgirl for Trimspa diet pills because of her 40 pound weight loss. She's back!

Anna Nicole Smith was once a stunningly beautiful young model who had modeled for Playboy, Guess?, and Lane Bryant. Now she is a 36-year-old still-beautiful-but-slightly-overdone widow who has her own reality show in which she stars with her lawyer and best friend Howard, her 17-year-old son Daniel, and her personal assistant Kimmie. Wait, let's not forget Sugar Pie, Anna's tiny black dog that she takes with her EVERYWHERE!

Okay... well. What can I say? I enjoy this show because I enjoy Anna- she's my hero. Why? Simple. She's a big girl and she made it. I am also 5'11 with larger measurements and instead of feeling huge, I just say to myself "Anna's my size and she's gorgeous!" She makes me feel better. But don't get me wrong! I hardly approve of most of Anna's silly behavior as far as guzzling alcohol, swearing like a sailor, and having constant physical encounters with male AND female exhibitionists goes. But who the hell am I to judge the way she wants to live? I just think she's a kick to watch and I think it's really cute how she and Howard fight so much one wonders if they're really in love! Now THAT would be interesting... a new wedding for Anna? Well, maybe and maybe not, but watch at least one episode of the new season- that weight is GONE!