L.A.P.D.: To Protect and to Serve

I'm embarrassed to say I even hesitated to change the channel when this...hell I don't know what to call it, it doesn't deserve to be called a movie. I hate to knock on any movie because I know how hard it must be to get a movie made, but the idea that anything people must have worked so hard on could turn out to be this bad is both depressing and frightening. I've never actually hated a movie, but this one comes awful close, the only reason I rated it a one is because I could not rate it any lower.

A disgrace trying to be a mirror of the L.A.P.D. A few aging stars coasting through a terrible script. Dirty cops wanting to turn against other dirty cops. Cops that don't want to be cops. Unrealistic, over-kill on the gun fire. Front line cast is made up of: Dennis Hopper, Michael Madsen, Marc Singer and Charles Durning. A glimmer of promise from Kiara Hunter, Carolyn Dunn and Brenda Campbell. This movie can serve as background noise while passing around the party dip and refilling the cold refreshments. I guess there is no law for bad acting. Even the simulated sex is terrible.

I couldn't believe that I was seeing Charles Durning, Marc Singer, Dennis Hopper and Mike Madsen in such an incredibly asinine movie. The only reason I watched it to the end was that I might see at least one or two good scenes that might redeem it. This didn't happen.

As a former Law Enforcement Officer, I was appalled to see the Los Angeles Police Department portrayed as a group of bumbling buffoons and gangsters. Equally bumbling was the direction of this movie. Example: Minor cast members awkwardly gawking about sets, obviously lacking experience as to how to fit in with a scene. Don't waste your time with this one. It isn't even fit for falling asleep on.

It never fails to amaze me that even with a good cast, big enough budget, ok theme, producers and directors can churn out second rate rubbish like this. even the actors at the end of the movie must be thinking "six guys ten feet apart firing hundreds of shots at each other and it takes a full minute before one hits it's mark"

To Protect and Serve: Protect us the viewer and serve the acting to the dogs. Why oh Why did I rent this? Because of Dennis Hopper. After all, he has made some good films, even very good ones. I saw him on the cover, and instead of checking IMDB first, I took a chance. This trash is the Plan Nine from Outer Space version of modern law enforcement. If I were a LAPD employee, a LA criminal, a citizen of LA, even an alien from Mars, I would demand that all money used in this production be used to burn all copies of this wherever they may be. Considering the absolute total ineptness of the acting, directing, and writing efforts here, there may be only enough loose coin to burn just one copy. Dennis Hopper was in this for 3 maybe 4 minutes. And you could plainly see he was over acting. Dennis, do not add this to your filmography. This is a very, very bad film.