Sledgehammer

For years I've tried to watch every 80s slasher movie and rank them in hopes of finding a hidden gem.... This was not one of them. I knew going into it that it was going to be bad but this was the second lowest one I've ranked out of 100s. The slow motion shots really really tested my patience. I think they were added into the movie just to stretch it as close as possible to 90 minutes. Movie consists of chases scenes up the same flight of stairs, down the same hallway, and into the same bedroom over and over and over.. outside of the one topless part, and a slow motion slap, there were no redeeming qualities.

The title appears, barely legible, in blocks, on screen for nineteen slow seconds, before being smashed with the title object. We, the audience, are then seemingly beaten over the head with some of the poorest picture quality imaginable, even for shot-on-video flick, during the opening title sequence, while an imitation of the Phantasm theme is played.

Obnoxious, amateur actors/ amateur porn stars gather in a farmhouse where, ten hyperbolic years earlier ( because nine years is never enough time, but eleven years is always too much time ) a double murder was committed. At one point, the filmmakers seemingly forgot they were doing a slasher film, and meander into a food fight, which lasts for nearly eight minutes, before setting up a seance, to contact the spirit of the killer from a decade earlier. " Some of you may have already heard what I'm about to tell you, " Mr. Polo Shirt informs us. We all have, because at this point, the filmmakers pad out the run time with a lengthy expositional flashback to the first scene from this very movie, in a Friday the 13th part 2- inspired bit, telling the audience what we already know. Two of these dip****s are later killed with a sledgehammer, which prompts another dip**** to ask​, " Any clues? " Perhaps the sledgehammer, and the dead bodies themselves, which they move, because they're all drunken morons? They remain in murder house overnight, basically waiting to be killed. The ghost/ killer/ whatever he is materialises/ crawls out of the woodwork, to off these nitwits one by one, and they kind of, sort of, fight for their lives.

The cast:

Chuck, seemingly cast for his muscular physique, and willingness to wear a polo shirt.

Joni: completely forgettable.

John: This guy just sucked.

Mary: kind of pretty, but has the same awful 80s perm as Joni.

Jimmy: looks likes he's killing time until the next Hall and Oates concert, or until he and Mary and Joni go have their hair permed at the same place.

Carol: probably the best of an admittedly lousy cast, but with the same perm hairdo as the rest of them.

Joey : I don't even remember this guy, but I'm sure he sucked.

Lover: sucked.

Mother: tolerable, but she and Jimmy and Mary and Joni look like they all have the same hairstylist, who only knows​how to do that same perm.

The boy: was a lame villain.

Killer: was he the killer? I thought it was the boy?

The driver: why was he even here?

But for all the grief and aggravation, I must admit I watched this film twice this month, before writing this review. It has some occasionally inspired camera-work, especially during the climax, among static shots of hallways. The music score is eerily effective, it reminded me a bit of German industrial band Einsturzende Neubauten, particularly their record, Zeichnungen des Patienten O. T. Plus, the added terror of a killer stalking his victims in their own home is a terrifying thought in and of itself. Gore fans should find enough in the ending to make it worthwhile, too.

I'm not saying this is * good *, but there are worse movies out there, like Blood Massacre, for example. Without the opening and closing credits, this is only 74 minutes long. Without the use of slow motion, it might only be about 20 minutes long.

Ted Prior was a Playgirl Playmate trying to get into acting, his brother David uhm, just owned a camera I guess, and so a fruitful collaboration started that has been going on for more than thirty years now. Their absolute masterpiece is probably 1987's "Deadly Prey", a complete and utter rip-off to "Rambo: First Blood" that is just irresistibly entertaining in all its wrongness. That one I can really recommend, but "Sledgehammer" is a whole other story. This thing is one of the most boring slasher films I have ever seen, it's clear the dynamic duo still had lots to learn when they made this. For example, David Prior hadn't figured out yet how to turn off the slo-mo effect on his camcorder. He uses slo-mo for the most random things. Some slo-mo in the grand finale, makes sense. Every single death scene in slow-motion, that's pushing it but fair enough. But why would you use it when the scene is just people walking around in a garden or sitting on a couch doing nothing? Is this young David Prior's creative force kicking in and not having a clue what it's doing? Not that the movie would be any good at a normal speed, but at least it would be lots shorter. Occasionally there is some almost-suspense (the clichéd slasher scene where one character tells the killer's legend isn't bad), the opening scene is also quite atmospheric, but as a whole "Sledgehammer" just doesn't bring much to the table to keep you entertained. It also doesn't help that you'll constantly have to yell "just get out of the house!" at the screen, my throat is still sore from yesterday. If this led the Priors on the road to "Deadly Prey" I appreciate it exists, but that's the nicest thing I can say about it.

First of all, I want to make clear this caveat- it takes a lot of effort to conceive of, write, and execute a film, not to mention actually get it into video stores in the earliest days of VHS. This alone is worthy of respect.

With that out of the way, as a representative of the art form, this is easily one of the worst movies ever made, from every conceivable standpoint. The characters are not even one-dimensional, what can generously be called a plot has galaxy-sized holes in it, the killer has powers which are hilariously inconsistent scene-to-scene, some shots linger well past the point of absurdity, scenes are needlessly drawn out and some, inexplicably, are in slow motion, with several ending in weird freeze-frames, and a key moment where the killer's motivation is revealed (I think) is so muffled that it is indecipherable.

This is a very hard movie to get through, and it clocks in at well under 90 minutes.

Watch this with a group of friends in the style one would watch The Room or Rocky Horror, the latter of which looks like Citizen Kane in comparison.

This is a mediocre horror movie. It's very cheap, has acceptable (Sandy Brooke, Ted Prior, Linda McGill) to downright bad (George Eastman, Steven Wright, Tim Aguilar) acting, standard direction, poor screenplay, and okay photography.

It is about a woman and her lover who is killed by her young son(looks about seven years old, kinda young to be insane). Ten years later a group of vacationing teens (they look like their in their 30's, serious!) show up looking to have a weekend full of sex, booze, and fun. Their fun turns to sheer terror as their weekend is interrupted by the raving maniac's spirit.

It was directed by David Prior (KILLER WORKOUT, LOST PLATOON, MARDI GRAS FOR THE DEVIL) who does an okay job with the camera (for being a video movie) and creates a real film feel but when the action starts, he results to too many slo mo shots. Sandy Brooke is the most capable actress in this film, she gives real feeling to her character. Too bad she was in this movie.

It was shot on video before "BLOOD CULT" though and is wwwaaayyy better than W.A.V.E. Exploitation/Horror videos (At least SORORITY SLAUGHTER 1 & 2). Since IMD doesn't have a cast list I will supply one.

CAST

JONIE....LINDA MCGILL

CHUCK....TED PRIOR

JOHN.....JOHN EASTMAN

MARY.....JANINE SCHEER

JIMMY....TIM AGUILAR

CAROL....SANDY BROOKE

JOEY.....STEPHEN WRIGHT

LOVER....MICHAEL SHANAHAN

MOTHER...MARY MENDEZ

THE BOY (young)....JUSTIN GREER

THE BOY (older/spirit)....DOUG MATLEY

THE DRIVER....RAY LAWRENCE

All in all an entertaining if not throughly enjoyable genre piece stricken by poverty ($40,000 U.S. dollars).

5/10 (based on shot on video horror features)