Sanctimony

Not much to say here. The moment I saw Casper was the main character, hell that he was even in it, I knew it was gonna be awful. The movie itself wasn't the worst, but the story was badly written. And it kept creating question after question as to why things were happening, but those questions are never answered. You could tell this was definitely a 90s/early 2000s movie.

Oh, my goodness. I would have never thought it was possible for me to see a thriller worse than Domestic Disturbance this soon, but here it is. Armed with rotten plot, terrible editing, stilted acting, and headache-inducing 'style' (sorry, I have no other words for it), Sanctimony is the kind of movie that almost forces you to re-evaluate an entire genre; that is, this film is so bad that even the thrillers I condemned as complete failures now seem a little better.

Now, not only Sanctimony is a terrible film in itself, it also succeeds in the difficult task of ripping off better movies and do a pathetic job with it. Right from the main titles -- nothing but a blatant attempt to reproduce the ones from Se7en -- I was under the impression that something didn't smell quite right. As soon as the movie started with a series of corny, wanna-be hip quick-cuts full of gory images and bombastic colors, I knew where that smell was coming from.

It turns out that two policemen, or rather policeman Jim Renart (Michael Paré) and policewoman Dorothy Smith (Jennifer Rubin), are investigating on a murder spree in Vancouver. A serial killer, known as "Monkey Killer" (what a menacing, chilling nickname, uh?) for his working methods, has killed quite a lot of people. You see, this nut apparently works following the proverb "see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil" and cuts eyes, ears, and tongues out of his victims. So far, six eyes, six ears, and three tongues. In very ingenious fashion, Renart and Smith figure out that the Monkey Killer is probably going to kill other three people... well, because he probably wants to complete the number 666. So suddenly the film focuses on Tom Gerrick (Casper Van Dien), a young, successful, good-looking businessman, with a dreadful temper. And that's where the rip-off of American Psycho kicks in.

So we follow the life of the two police officers and the young psychopath, none of which is interesting in the least, until they finally meet. Along the way to that, a disco where Renart barely misses Gerrick unintentionally offers us one of the funniest scenes in recent memory: Renart goes in the back of the disco club, because... well, just because the script tells us it's a suspect place; then, with one single punch in the stomach, Renard gets rid of a big guard who blocks the path, and the guard is never heard of again? Does this scene strike anyone else as completely unrealistic?

Anyway, after another murder, Gerrick turns in as a witness, but Smith and especially Renart immediately suspect he might be the killer. In typical Basic Instinct fashion, Smith gets some dates with the young businessman, under the assumption that she might discover his true identity.

I won't spoil the ending but it is, quite simply, an embarrassment; there are contradictions, some plot holes, issues that never get resolved, and especially there is one last scene where a brutal mass murder, supposed to be shocking and sad, comes off as such laughably overdone and nonsensical that I frankly can't imagine how anyone could not laugh at it.

At 87 minutes, Sanctimony is really pushing it. You never care about one single character, because they are all so flat (not to mention boring) that you know exactly who is who the first time you meet them. You are never pulled into the story, because the scenes are connected through weak plot devices when not downright unnecessary and out of place. The acting ranges from average (Van Dien) to downright atrocious (Rubin, and most of the supporting cast); the music is abysmal generic techno, and the photography is one of the worst I have ever seen. Of course, like every fiasco of the genre, we are provided with a little bit of gratuitous nudity.

3/10

That was enjoyable enough, my second movie in my Uwe Boll marathon (I've watched POSTAL before and will again, just wasn't a part of the marathon). Fairly generic thriller, actually surprised me a few times and made me tense in areas. Liked the music a good bit, the random flashbacks to violence or sex were unnecessary, it felt like the editor went "well this scene is boring so let me just put this here." The music was actually pretty good and that's something I've noticed in most Boll films, the music is almost always the best part. I've seen many compare it to American Psycho and Seven so I should probably watch those to see how similar it actually is.

I went into this movie with low expectations, knowing Uwe Boll's legacy as a film director, and screenplay writer, and I was still disappointed. Uwe Boll finds a way to make each and every movie he is involved in worse and worse. The overall concept wasn't a bad one, a man bored with his life as a stock broker becomes a serial killer. But the problem with the movie is there is no in between, he goes straight from stock broker to serial killer. The film has no-name actors, and I can see why, after watching the movie, I can't see why any actor with a career would want to even be involved in this movie. Anyone who turned it down did their careers a favor. And if you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor and don't.

I give Sanctimony a 3 out of 10

Although this wasn't a bad thriller, I felt there wasn't enough background for the characters to really get us in touch with them. Pare is a homicide detective on the trail of serial killer Van Dien. Pare seems to be in the middle of a mid life crises while tracking down Van Dien. Pare's wife, Oxenberg did a great job appearing genuine and vulnerable in her part. It takes a bit of concentration to figure out WHY Casper's character (the killer) would just snap completely and give up his killing spree, when he was no where near being caught. Without going into scene detail, here's my theory. Van Dien's character, already a vein and cruel individual who enjoys dominating, torturing and killing others, became even MORE disillusioned with American society. He encounters Pare as the witness who "found" a murdered girl. Obviousely Van Dien wanted to be found. Here is where you expect the killer to really start toying with the police for the fun of it. Instead, it's like he became bored with his own killing game and any statement or satisfaction that was to be gained by his killing. He just snaps and goes for broke in his killing. I got the feeling near the end that he entered an even darker place (if that's possible), hopelessness. There was gore and violence of course, but it was not over done. A bizarre thriller that is certainly worth a watch for lovers of the genre.