The Last Slumber Party

Was this movie edited by Salvador Dali on drugs? When I'm trying to get invested in a movie, it's important to have a vague idea of what's going on. When your killer teleports as often as this guy does, you have two options: learn basic editing or, if you don't have the talent for that, write in a line about how he knows teleportation. Writer/Director/Star Stephen Tyler (not to be confused with the much scarier Steven Tyler) never made another horror movie after this one, and neither did any of his actors. I'd be grateful for that, but then again: "The Last Slumber Party" is also intensely fascinating. How bad can a movie get before you stop calling it a movie? You just stare in awe because you have no idea what the next scene will bring. When you look at it that way, this is much more entertaining than a halfway competent project. My favorite parts: every time our mad psychopath (Tyler himself) opens his eyes real wide because he can't come up with any other way to act crazy. That's some great stuff.

I love a good bad cheap movie ("The Giant Claw" remains one of my all-time favorites) but this one is just trash. It's the cheapest, most poorly-written, poorly-acted, poorly-edited piece of crap I've seen in many, many years. On top of all that, it's just plain BORING... and you really can't get around that obstacle, which is what makes watching it just plain no fun, even for those who enjoy watching terrible movies. While ALL the acting is atrocious, the guy who plays the doctor deserves special mention for being considerably beneath the skill level of his co-stars. (I note that this is his one and only film credit... hardly surprising.) The only thing that made it survivable to the end was the Rifftrax commentary. Please, please, please avoid, unless you have Mike, Kevin and Bill holding your hand the whole way.

I can barely even form a coherent sentence to describe to you what this movie actually is after having seen it, but I'll try.

The premise is your typical cliché: A killer comes to slice up some teens. Here, it's an escaped mental patient in a doctor's outfit wielding a scalpel. Against all odds and even logic itself, he goes on a rather successful murder-spree.

This movie is like something a bunch of friends knocked out in a weekend. They probably had no idea what they were doing, I doubt a script was written, they clearly had no budget to work with, and very little experience in making movies. But they still did it, and that's kind of amazing.

The writing is abysmal, the dialog is even worse. The editing is a train wreck, where it's clear they dubbed music over individual shots rather than entire scenes, leading to incredibly disjointed moments where cutting to different camera angle will remove the background music until they go back to the first camera. Acting ranges from wooden to supremely over-the-top. The killer in particular has lots of (great?) scenes where he's staring directly in to the camera with his eyes bugging out, waving a scalpel around for no reason, like he's trying to dissect the lens.

I had the pleasure of watching this movie with a group of friends, and we all had a blast. There's a lot of amazing stupidity worth laughing at, and the movie actually does a pretty good job of ratcheting up its own absurdity. The last 10-15 minutes are as close to a literal fever dream as any movie can come.

Would I recommend? It's a STUNNINGLY bad movie, but it's also thoroughly ridiculous and I bet everyone involved had a lot of fun producing it. If that sounds right up your alley, then by all means, check this out.

Dismal, just dismal......... when it comes to slasher flicks I really do hope there aren't any worse than this, but if there are, well than that's quite a shame.

Reviewing The Last Slumber Party...... what a pleasure, here goes. After seeing this flick not a single positive thought comes to mind, however if you ever have the urge to see the worst example of the slasher film genre - this is it: The Last Slumber Party. It's a pathetically lame movie, the worst of it's kind and a failure on all levels, however, at the same time it's also an excellent example of not just shoddy film-making, but rather a tour-de-force of all things bad in movies. Which in it's case only intensifies the longer it goes and by the movies end you should have by then, developed a healthy amount of hatred for it and the reasons for that are many. Let me cite some of those reasons.

Right from the very start the movie opens up with an utterly tasteless opening credits sequence, in which every other word is displayed in hot pink, in addition to that you'll hear some lame 80's glam-rock band blaring away. So factually speaking before you're even through the movies open credits you're -already- up to your ears in a sea of tasteless dreck, but the worst is yet to come. And what of the actors, you say? Well I think you'll quickly deduce the fact that the films cast is comprised, almost entirely, of a small gaggle of dumb horny teens (do I have you cringing yet?), yet another clue as to what level of film-making one can expect to see from The Last Slumber Party - oh but the movie has just begun. The films "teen cast" is just plain terrible and the adult actors are just as bad; especially the guy who plays the doctor, I've never seen anyone less charismatic than him. The dialog of this movie (just listen to it!) could not sound any more amateurish or juvenile (though it can get pretty colorful, I won't lie), even illogical at times. The films script is simply littered with copious amounts of generic slang and over-used clichés and before long their lingo (i.e. drivel) becomes incredibly redundant and tiresome.

From a purely visual perspective the films cinematography and editing tends to get worse and worse as the movie goes, several scenes near the end for instance are definitely under-lit, not to mention the camera that they used was obviously having focus issues, which is a problem on and off throughout the whole movie. But if there's one aspect of The Last Slumber Party that's worse than all others, it would have to be in how it was edited. This movie is simply one of the worst examples of film-editing you're likely ever to see and as a result this movie has little in the way of logical flow and it gets unbelievably repetitive before long. The movie looks as if it were edited by someone who no longer had a functioning long-term memory (as if their mind was fried due to years of drug-abuse), because there are all kinds of issues with the plotting and continuity; so much so that for the most part the movie is nothing more than a jumble of lame, poorly-shot scenes that contain little in the way of logic and even less coherency. Especially near the end where several scenes are either blatantly out of sequence and/or repeated multiple times, however the editing is highly questionable throughout the entire movie.

Oh yeah and not to forget this gripping foot-note, which involves orange juice! That's right, if there's one thing that stands out in this pathetic movie, more so than anything else, it would have to be the abnormal and inordinate amount of importance that's placed on WHETHER OR NOT the doctor (at his wives request) will remember to buy: Orange Juice! Seriously, I'm not making that up and do try to keep in mind that this is supposed to be a slasher film or a "horror" film. Come to think of it, this movie IS a thing of horror - but not for any of the reasons it's makers intended it to be. The suspense runs thick, oh so thick, will the doctor buy orange juice or will he not. Well, you'll just have to wait and see.

The Last Slumber Party isn't just the worst slasher film, but also one of the worst movies period. But I suppose if you were to completely shut-off your brain you might be able to enjoy this movie, but really this truly is movie-making at it's most dire.

This is a bad movie by even Rifftrax standards, it's that bad.

Three teenage girlfriends celebrate their last day of high school by having a slumber party, not knowing that an escaped scrub and mask-wearing killer has set his sights on them.

The Last Slumber Party is about as far as you can get in the barrel without scraping the bottom. At under 80 minutes, it'd padded to high heaven with nonsensical dream sequences. The acting is awful with terrible line readings and women well over high school age pretending that they're still 17 or 18. The kills are all uninspired with the same blood squirting scalpel dragged across yet another hapless victim's throat. The movie also looks as if it was shot on several different formats and cut together. Some scenes look like they were shot on film and crudely transfered to video later on while most of the film resembles late 80's family camcorder videos.