The Deathhead Virgin

As a child at summer camp, the councillors were hard pressed to find an effective way to punish our cabin for out mis-doings. Well, the day that they made us watch this film in its entirety (without letting us fall asleep), was the day that they found that effective punishment. This film is actually painful to watch. I am not exaggerating!

Another plodding, and ultimately boring, b-movie. There isn't much here for bad movie fans. There's no insane dialogue, directing, acting, etc. The problem with this movie is that it simply does nothing. Norman Foster (the director) spent way too much time filming scenes that have NOTHING to do with the story. They, literally, leave nothing to the imagination in this flick. We see endless amounts of footage of the main characters strolling around town, swimming in the ocean, drinking, eating, sleeping, performing menial tasks, driving, etc. This movie could have been a documentary of two idiotic Americans squandering their lives in the Philippines.

What's the movie about? Well, ostensibly, it's about a "deathhead virgin" who is awakened by our Americans (whilst exploring undersea wreckage). The "deathhead virgin" occasionally surfaces, and occasionally murders some poor sot. In the meantime, our American divers mess around on shore, and make perfunctory dives to the previously mentioned wreckage. That's about it.

Is there anything here for the bad movie fan? Unfortunately, no. Other than the aforementioned tons of useless footage/dialogue, there isn't much to sink your "bad movie teeth" into. Really the only highlight of this film, if you happen to be a heterosexual male, are the incredibly attractive Philippino women. Not enough to carry a bad movie (or a good movie, for that matter).

Bad Movie Score: 5/10 Good Movie Score: 3.5/10

According to IMDb the plot of "The Deathhead Virgin" goes like that:a treasure hunter Jock Gaynor finds a sunken Spanish galleon off the coast of a Philippine island.What he doesn't know is that the ship is guarded by the spirit of an ancient Moro princess-the titular Deathhead Virgin.When Jock removes an amulet from around her bleached skeleton she returns to life.The local legend states that once the Deathhead Virgin is coming back from her watery grave seven virgins must be ritually sacrificed.The action of "The Deathhead Virgin" moves at snail's pace,the acting is amateurish and there is almost no suspense.Sunny Philippine locations are nice and there is a bit of naked flesh.Unfortunately "The Deathhead Virgin" looks cheap and tiresome.However this is perhaps the only one horror film I know that features a masked,harpoon-wielding,homicidal,aquatic and naked zombie girl.5 virgins out of 10.

Since, well... forever, I'm attracted to "The Deathhead Virgin" because of its lurid title, the awesome cover poster, and the promising plot-concept of an evil sea-witch guarding the treasures of a sunken Spanish galleon. But for exactly as long, I've also been put off by the low rating, harsh reviews, and the simple fact this is one of those low-budgeted Filipino-horrors from the early 70s. Curiosity always wins, in the end...

Everything about "The Deathhead Virgin" is slow, dull, and unstructured. The opening titles go on forever, and we're already 15 minutes into the film before "directed by Norman Foster" appears. Then there's a forty minutes' lasting (40!) flashback to explain why the movie begins with a funeral service. I still think the plot is interesting enough to tell, as it mixes typically 70s treasure-hunting elements with local Philippine folklore myths, but the pacing is so intolerably slow and the spectacle-level is so dreadfully minimal, that most people will give up (and understandably so). After the flashback (it lasts so long you'll even forget it's a flashback...) there's an interesting twist, but it's too little too late. The "monster" is a naked home girl wearing a ridiculous mask, the underwater footage is underwhelming, and the supportive role of Filipino B-movie hero Vic Diaz is hardly worth mentioning. Believe the rating and the reviews; - "The Deathhead Virgin" isn't worth your time.

With a name like The Deathhead Virgin it was pretty much inevitable that one day I would sit down to watch this one. I'm one of those people drawn irresistibly to films with cool names, regardless of their quality I can just dig the feeling of watching a movie with a good name. This one gets pretty lousy reviews all round with good reason, not good, nor dysfunctional enough to pull off many classic bad movie tricks, The Deathhead Virgin merely goes about its business in its unassuming cheapie fashion and switches out to no fanfare after some 93 minutes or so. The plotting is actually kinda interesting, there's the odd twist and an ambition to the process that really could have done with some money, or better yet more concentration on the elements that work and editing for the bits that don't. The discovery of a supposedly Spanish wreck with attendant fake skeleton (seriously, it doesn't even begin to look like its anything more than a plastic model, so pristinely white and undamaged is its look) and some treasure sparks the return to life of a cursed virgin princess, possession and a spot of murder. Made in the Philipines, I guess the Westerners of the cast all liked the sunny location as there are scenes of various merry making, dancing and characters simply hanging about, which given the inherent interest of the locality isn't as boring as it might be but still rather puts the kibosh on any actual suspense. There' brief nudity and a little smidgen of gore but the murders are poorly staged and shock value is low. On the plus side, there are some fun cheesy solarisation visuals and the appearances of the titular boogeychick (is that the feminine of bogeyman?) are good for a few laughs, surprisingly for such a film she actually looks very close to her depiction on the posters, i.e. pretty cool and heck, once or twice even a little bit creepy. Mostly this film is weak stuff, never wild enough or bad enough, interesting images and ineptly handled schlock nuggets nestled amongst the padding and attractive women in bikini's aside there isn't much good here. I found it watchable enough, but it truly ain't great, worst of all is that it isn't even that funny. Well, it does bust out a ribtickling attempt at a bona fide action showdown at one stage that raises the pulse a little, but the effort would have been better used in the service of more horror goods. Larry Ward and Jock Gaynor can be blamed for a good deal of things, since they wrote and starred in the thing and their acting is non-charismatic and the script too drawn out. Director Norman Foster appears to be some kind of veteran in the profession but I can't say as his experience was visible on screen. I wouldn't really recommend this to anyone, but on the other hand I didn't dislike it nearly as much as I expected to, maybe its my love of really bad films, especially ones that sling a bit of cheapskate exotica around (fan dances for the win!). I was never quite disengaged, I smiled at times, I was even mildly entertained. But I can't really credit too much to the film, much as I'd like to. All in all this is a lowbrow matinée adventure/horror crossbreed that all but dedicated junk hunters can happily pass on by, as one of those unfortunate sorts I give it about a 4/10.