The Whole Nine Yards

Time is 2000. Bruce Willis fresh off 'the Fifth Element'. An on-form Matthew Perry fresh off 'Friends'. This is a crime-comedy with all the goods from either world, and it's done *just right*. The plot is good, and the film's got that typical contorted type story at the middle of it linking many different characters, but still absolutely coherent and compelling. Perry really is very funny in this one, and it's about to be one crazy ride for this prude of a dentist when an ex- big time conman is his neighbor and he finds out who he is and somehow finds himself involved. This is a crazy ride, with lots of great fun and action, good laughs, a good atmosphere between tight tension and comedy relief, the supporting cast is great, and the plots within the plots are strong enough to make this a fairly layered piece of genre-hybrid cinema. Just all in all, an excellent comedy.

"The Whole Nine Yards" is surprisingly effective screwball comedy that reminds me of such classics as "Bringing Up Baby" though with way higher amoral body count.

At first the actors seem to be each in a parallel movie, with Matthew Perry doing physical slapstick comedy, Bruce Willis deadly serious, Rosanna Arquette just nasty, Amanda Peet being her "Jack and Jill" character (one of my TV guilty pleasures) and Natasha being like a super-model.

Then something clicks in and it just gets funny and I couldn't help laughing and laughing.

I hope Michael Clarke Duncan gets to keep those fancy suits, because it must be hard to get ones to fit him; with "Green Mile," this performance impressively shows his range.

(originally written 3/19/2000)

Nicholas 'Oz' Oseransky (Matthew Perry) is a meek dentist in Montreal. His wife Sophie (Rosanna Arquette) is a money grubber who may be looking to cash in on his life insurance. His new assistant Jill St. Claire (Amanda Peet) tells him to divorce her. Then notorious mob hit-man Jimmy 'The Tulip' Tudeski (Bruce Willis) moves in next door. He immediately recognizes Jimmy is in danger of a contract kill from Chicago mob boss Janni Pytor Gogolak (Kevin Pollak). Sophie pushes Oz to cash in on the contract and he goes back to Chicago to appease her but not intending to contact Janni. She immediately tells Jimmy to double cross Oz. Oz is confronted by hit-man 'Frankie Figs' Figueroa (Michael Clarke Duncan) who brings him to Janni. Oz falls for femme fatale Cynthia Tudeski (Natasha Henstridge). She tells him that Janni's father Lazlo hid $10M with her before being sent to prison. It can only be accessed with three signatures from her, Janni, and Jimmy. Or else it can be accessed with their death certificates. Janni sends Frankie with Oz back to Montreal to track down and kill Jimmy. Only there are even more double crosses.

My biggest problem with this is director Jonathan Lynn. He doesn't show enough comedic skills in this. There are some good potential but it looks like a second rate movie. This should be so much funnier. It's simply not well filmed. There is also the $10M jackpot. It's way too convoluted and simply a device to give the characters a reason to do what they do. It's backwards writing. Mostly, it's awkward.

The good part is all the good actors around. Most of them are doing their best. Natasha Henstridge is a little stiff. Kevin Pollak isn't as funny as he needs to be. Matthew Perry is working hard and has good chemistry with Bruce Willis. The boys are good with Amanda Peet. Perry has less chemistry with Natasha Henstridge. There are a few laughs. I just wish it has a lot more.

I rented The Whole Nine Yards a few days ago, and just watched it this morning, I'm such a huge Bruce Willis fan, I don't see him that often in comedies, so I was curious how this would work. But after viewing this film, I have to just say that this movie was just so funny! I couldn't believe how much it made me laugh, I know it's such a dark subject, but it was pretty cool how they just turned into a zanny comedy. Bruce Willis and Matthew Perry were just the most perfect choices, they were like ying and yang. Matthew as this guy who just is scared of everything and finally has something at the end to say where he has control and Bruce couldn't have been a more perfect choice as the cocky and yet charismatic hit man who could be threatening but yet the most likable guy in the world. The story was just very clever and worked so well with the cast.

Nick is just your average guy, he is a dentist and a very likable guy, but he gets walked on quite a bit, especially by his wife who he feels like he owes her family, so he won't divorce her. But one day, a new neighbor moves in, Nick notices him pretty much off the bat, it's Jimmy "the tulip" Tudeski, the famous hit man who has killed 17 people and also ratted out his boss. He's on the run from his boss in Chicago and has a ransom on his head. Nick actually likes Jimmy, but his wife, Sophie, says to turn him in and get the award. He goes to Chicago and falls in love with Jimmy's wife, Cynthia. When Nick comes back home to Canada, he learns from Jimmy that his wife has gone to hire a hit man to kill Nick. But Nick also learns that Jimmy wants to kill Cynthia, Jimmy's boss wants to kill Nick, Nick's receptionist is also a hit woman, pretty much everyone wants to kill everyone.

That's pretty much the best way to sum up The Whole Nine Yards, but trust me when I say that this is such a fun movie. I really had a good time watching this movie, Bruce Willis was just so great. But I have to admit that Amanda Peet's performance floored me when she was just admiring Bruce's work and getting advice from him on what her first hit should be like. She was just so adorable while being deadly. So please, I would recommend this film, it's a dark comedy, yes, but it's all good, just learn to let go and have fun if you're very sensitive on the subject.

7/10

Is a guy who has killed seventeen people necessarily a `bad' guy? Not a question everybody is going to have to ask themselves, to be sure, but what if that guy moved in next door to you? It's a situation that just may induce an introspective moment or two. Which is exactly what happens in `The Whole Nine Yards,' directed by Jonathan Lynn and starring Bruce Willis and Matthew Perry. Hit-man Jimmy `The Tulip' Tudeski (Willis) ratted out his boss in Chicago, and now he's on the lam. He makes his way to Canada, where he buys a house next door to a hapless dentist, Nicholas `Oz' Oseransky (Perry), who is suffering from inherited debts and a shrew of a wife, Sophie (Rosanna Arquette), not to mention a mother-in-law from Hell (Carmen Ferland). When he realizes who his neighbor is about to be, his first instinct is to run, but Sophie has other ideas. It seems there's a price on Jimmy's head; one Janni Gogolack (Kevin Pollak) would like to take his revenge on the guy who's responsible for his father going away for a long, long time. So Sophie squeezes Oz into a corner until he agrees to go to Chicago and meet with Janni to put the finger on Jimmy. Not a great idea, Oz thinks, but it at least sounds like a nice vacation, so he goes. But, of course, he should have stayed with his instincts, because he soon finds himself looking down the barrel of trouble. And the only way out, it seems, is down...

What Lynn put together here is actually a fairly light-hearted, black comedy; the nature of the story dictates that there will be violence in it, and there is, but much of it is implied rather than graphic. The pace is good, and Lynn develops the characters enough to let you know exactly who they are and what they are all about. There's not a lot of depth, but it's not necessary; the actors have each made their respective characters unique to a point that puts them beyond stereotype, and it works perfectly for this film and the story. Some of what happens is inevitable, though not necessarily predictable, and certain aspects will keep you guessing right up to the end. Typical of a comedy that leans to the dark side, nothing in this story is cut and dried.

Willis is perfect as Jimmy The Tulip, giving a rather reserved, subtle performance that puts Jimmy's guarded but confident manner into perspective. Underneath it all, this guy is really rather cold-blooded (he has to be, given his choice of employment), but his relationship with Oz gives it some warmth, at least externally. Like Chow Yun-Fat in `The Killer,' Jimmy is likable, but when you consider at arm's length who he is and what he is capable of, it's a bit disconcerting. And that's one of the aspects of the film that is so interesting-- because you know who and what Jimmy is, you never really know which way things are going to turn.

Perry is excellent, as well, as `Oz.' Henpecked and in dire straits, he is something of an updated version of the W.C. Fields character in `It's A Gift' or `The Bank Dick,' although a bit darker. Perry is charismatic, has impeccable timing with his delivery and uses physical comedy to great effect. His reactions to Willis and the situations in which he finds himself are brilliant and hilarious, and he seems to instinctively know just how far to take it to make it work. And it's the little, seemingly insignificant things he brings to the character that give the film that extra something and creates some memorable moments.

The supporting cast includes Michael Clarke Duncan (Frankie Figs), Natasha Henstridge (Cynthia), Amanda Peet (Jill St. Claire), Harland Williams (Special Agent Hanson) and Serge Christianssens (Mr. Boulez). It may not be the most original movie ever made, but `The Whole Nine Yards' is funny, has a great cast of actors who have taken characters you've basically seen before and made them their own, and does exactly what a film like this is supposed to do: Entertain. It's not going to make you ponder the universe or the state of the world today, but it's going to give you a couple of hours of laughs and some residual chuckles. Which, when you think about it, is not such a bad deal. It's the magic of the movies. I rate this one 7/10.