Tornado Run

Until today, I thought that Rachel McLish was the most beautiful female bodybuilder ever to appear in a movie, but now I discovered Sharon Bruneau through "Tonardo Run" and she gives Rachel STRONG competition for that title. Sadly, she doesn't get any opportunities to show her stuff in action scenes. But what action scenes? Most of them are stock footage (from obviously different film stock), and those few that aren't, are completely amateurish. I personally have always found aerial dogfights a little dull, but they have never been duller than in "Tornado Run". The direction is completely unenergetic, and coupled with a music score that sounds as if it came out of a B&W 1940's movie, technical quality so low that you sometimes can't even hear the dialogue, and actors that you've never heard of (and never will), make "Tornado Run" a sleep-inducer. I'm only giving it a 2/10 instead of 1 because of the sexy Sharon; I'm glad to see that she's still working in the film industry (according to IMDb, she was a stunt driver in "Fast And Furious", 2009).

Don't let the packaging fool you, for this very low budget movie is very poor looking. Two businessmen have a TV remote control that can light the fuse of explosive hidden in cars and homes of important embassy leaders, and it's up to a so-called elite squad of soldier to stop them. The flying footage is old stock footages that doesn't match the film footage. The film is really poorly made, and I tried my best to like it, but no luck. The ending is a letdown! If the film had an extra 200,000 grand, it might have worked better in production.

As a fan of low-grade, low-budget, moron action-adventure movies I have to admit this is one of the cheapest action-adventure flicks I have ever seen. How cheap? Well, not Godfrey Ho level, but certainly Ed Wood would have given a thumbs-up if he had been alive to see it. The movie relies on a mishmash of stock footage that isn't coordinated in the slightest and the soundtrack is either this thump-thump keyboard score that I swear has been used in at least 20 other action flicks or it's this ancient 1950's orchestra music that doesn't fit at all. The acting is about what you would expect for a movie with a low budget like this and all-around pretty bad for the most part, not that good acting would have helped with a mess like this.

The "bad guys" look like the sales and marketing department of the last company I worked for and are about as intimidating. For a bunch of bad guys trying to take over the world, you'd think they'd have a nicer office and a higher grade of floozies to fawn over them. One of their "weapons" is a TV remote that somehow is able to blow up important people in their vehicles or houses all over the world, never mind the differences in times zones or having no way of knowing if the important people were actually in the house or vehicle at the time the button was pushed. Generally, I find low-grade trash like this to be pretty entertaining just from it's sheer crapulence alone, but this film is so pitiful and boring all I can do is take it all in and shake my head.

During the big "fight" scene (mostly pieced together from old stock footage) they had the protagonist fighting with an old Chinese SKS from the 1960's as her weapon, a weapon that no military has used in combat since maybe like 1967 or so, that had no full-auto capabilities or the ability to detach a clip to load ammo. I'm no gun expert, but any shmoe could buy one of those things for like $100 when I was a kid and using that in a 1995 film couldn't help but jump out at me. These guys didn't know anyone with an old AR15 or M16 anywhere? Like I said, this movie is CHEAP. Pretty bad stuff all-around and if you are a fan of crappy action flicks, Tornado Run might be a film to test your threshold for badness. For diehard crap-junkies only.