Beach Movie

I picked this movie up in the Walmart $5 bin as a present for a friend. I couldn't help myself and I opened it and watched it. This has to be one of the hardest movies to sit through ever. The only good part is random nudity, but it doesn't make up for the crime that the producer committed against the viewer. Painfully bad to watch. I thought I might get some cheap laughs from it, like the laughs you get from watching Point Break. I just felt insulted. I normally think it's funny when someone tries to create the surfer lifestyle and completely screws it up. This is just sad. I don't believe that any of the characters surf at all in this movie.

I passed out on the couch one night and when I woke up THIS was on cable TV, so I watched it out of the sheer incredulity that anyone would actually remake "Hardbodies" minus the sex and most of the nudity. What you have left is the sorry tale of three middle-aged losers who are being taught how to "pull chicks" by two idiot California surf-dudes (who seem to be channeling the restless, undead spirits of Bill and Ted and the entire male cast of "Saved by the Bell"). What's really pathetic is that this movie actually features some name actors. Bronson Pinchot and Loretta Swit actually appear together in one of those horribly cliched bouncing-car sex scenes (in Iran they have filmmakers shot for putting such scenes in their movies--or at least they ought to). And speaking of people who really should be shot--how about Gabrielle Anwar's agent? This tres gorgeous actress who put the "scent" in "Scent of a Woman" only a few years ago is now appearing in THIS. And while she may look great in a bikini and rose-petal pasties (don't ask), it is definitely not worth subjecting yourself to this movie.

This movie is perhaps the most blatant rip off of another movie that I have ever scene. It was more remake then anything else.

The source material was the 1984 classic T & A flick "Hardbodies". Boardheads (or Beach Movie) has the exact same script, with the only difference being the characters names, and the fact that the new cast is unbelievably annoying. After the first 2 minutes, in which I identifed it as a bad remake, I suffered through the rest simply to determine whether the filmmakers would deviate one iota from the source -- sadly they did not.

I would like to take this opportunity to recommend to anyone that was contemplating viewing this garbage to watch the original instead, it is what this film aspires to be, that is mindless fun with hot babes taking their shirts off for no apparent reason. What they ended up with was pure drivel.

Sure its everywhere... but its fun, it's loose and just a beer and feet up hang. This is what its supposed to be. Fun...Basic 90s meets Annette / Frankie/Moon doggie farce, but much sexier, styled with silly dialogue surf rap to get lost on. Soundtrack is great SOCAL Southland beach bands. Take it with a grain.

Yes it is a blatant ripoff of "Hardbodies". However, I suspect the producer of Boardheads correctly calculated the target audience for his movie was still in diapers when Hardbodies came out. Not to mention that no self respecting Gen Z-er is going to watch a movie made in 1984. They'll choose modern dreck over old dreck just as surely as the tasties/hardbodies in both movies reject the old guys hitting on them. OK, so I've got to get to ten lines or my review gets rejected. Well I guess I could point out that the girls in Hardbodies were better looking. Maybe that means starlets these days have more choice over what roles they have to take. But I don't think so. Maybe Hardbodies had a bigger budget and could attract better looking starlets. Or maybe since I'm a baby boomer I just like the look of girls from the 80s.