Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfolds

Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfold isn't an action or adventure movie and it can barely be called sci-fi. This is a low budget R rated comedy. The R rating is as important to the film as it being a comedy. One of the main purposes of this movie is to show scantily clad topless women. This consists of three of the women competing and posing for a centerfold shoot topless. The topless scenes are not as frequent as you would think and there are no raunchy sexual situations. It really can't be called just a skin flick. The plot is poor, acting poor, and special effects poor. The 60 foot, occasionally topless, and frequently scantily clad star of the movie, J.J. North is the only thing holding this movie together. The comedy is funny because it's so lame and simplistic. This film is one of those that some would say 'It's so bad, it's good' and I think that is exactly what they were going for when making it. It's something you want to watch when you don't want to watch anything serious.

This movie was one of the first that I ever bought on DVD; for some reason I've held on to it, mostly due to its historical value as one of the most disappointing films I have ever watched. The title led me to believe that I would be watching beautiful, naked big-titted women growing to impossible sizes and ruining everyone's s*** for 90 solid minutes. Instead, I get 2 minutes of rampage, and 88 minutes of 60 a 60 foot tall woman moping around in a circus tent, and a bunch of evil guys trying to exploit her. Who do these guys think they are? I want chicks, not smarmy guys. In addition, there's this annoying sub-plot involving a giant rat. Who's idea was that? They could have at least made it a giant cat in order to incorporate some pussy jokes. There are a couple of good boob gags in this one, but on the whole, it is a massively wasted opportunity to exploit women who have been the victims of science. Where's Daryl Hannah when you need her?

I and my friends have watched this several times. Its amusing with a couple vodka tonics and good friends. Additionally, it has JJ North and Tammy Parks. I would watch either one of the read the phone book. Sadly, JJ is out of the biz now, which really is sad since she had potential that went beyond just her natural good looks. However, the days of b-movie actresses rising above a steady diet of bad films are over. Rene Zellweger may have been the last. Who would have guess that one of the stars of Chicago started out in Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

In anycase, its fun and the women are gorgeous. Come back JJ.

Where are you Kristine Debell?

This one leaves us with the age old question: which was worse the plot or the acting? Well, actually it was probably the directing or the editing. The highlight of this exercise in absurdity is the cameo appearances of Disney's Tommy Kirk, Stanley (My 3 Sons) Livingston, and Russ Tamblyn (who also was unfortunate enough to cameo in 'Cabin Boy').

Roger Corman produced, Fred Olen Ray directed, and it stars a trio of centerfolds. One look at the cover and you should know what you're in for. Its stupid, silly, hokey, sexy, and a pretty fun time for fans of late vintage, middlebrow T&A farce. The girls are hot, (two of them immaculate), frequently topless, and the whole affair is very straightforward, Joe Bob Briggs-style, drive-in camp. There is a bit of the forced campy acting that I don't like, but the majority of the time, the cast are taking their roles seriously, (to the best of their abilities, anyway), which adds a level of charm that is often lacking in these kind of movies. The effects are silly, but decent enough to escape unintentional laughability. I wouldn't go so far as calling this movie a gem, but it is above-average for its genre, as far as overall watchability goes. If you used to enjoy "Joe Bob's Drive-in Theater," this movie is a decent throwback. The whole premise is actually strangely hot, don't you think? I mean, she's a whole lot of centerfold up there! 2.5 stars.