The Journey: Absolution

This movie has the hottest men running around, training, fighting, all in Jockey pouch brand thigh-length boxer briefs. The typical military fighting fantasy is lived out. It is very hot! Too bad they wear briefs or thongs under their boxers.

I usually start one of these with a brief plot summary. I think I'll skip that with The Journey: Absolution. Like the film's title, the plot is pretty much an indescribable, nonsensical mess. Something about a secret military training facility in the Arctic. Mario Lopez is sent in (I think) to investigate reports of a missing soldier. And then, out of the blue, the plot switches to full on sci-fi with aliens trying to come through an interstellar gate to take over Earth or something. Whatever! In reality, though, the movie's main purpose seems to be to show a bunch of hunky, good looking, sweaty guys in their underwear. It was more like watching a Calvin Klein commercial than a movie.

Beyond the ridiculous lack of a coherent plot, just about everything else is equally bad. My chief complaint is the acting. Mario Lopez is plain old horrible. His accent comes and goes and his delivery is beyond awkward. Richard Greico is so bad he's laughable. He over-acts every scene like his life depended on it. As for Jaime Pressly - she's in the movie (and that's the kindest thing I'll say about any of the acting). In short, The Journey Absolution is a complete disaster.

One last thing, I did get a chuckle out of the number of times Pressly's character was able to sneak into the top secret military base. That's some awesome security!

2/10

So who is "Pete", anyways? For some reason this film employs the phrase "for the love of Pete" repeatedly and all I can guess is, judging by the looks of the male cast, more than a couple of them may, in fact, have been in love with a guy named "Pete". The plot has been used countless times in other movies, involving some guy infiltrating a secret government organization plotting to overthrow the government and the world and yada, yada, yada. You've seen it all before and this cheap straight to video junk is typical of the time period and, for me personally, a prime example of why I lost interest in newer movies, never mind the homoerotic nonsense. Can be used as a time-waster or sleep aid, but its mostly just crap.

Not good. Very poor story, very poor performances and exceedingly poor construction of sets.

I don't know what this was supposed to be about because it was just a dull film from 2 minutes in and stayed there.

Since I am not gay, I did not get turned on by the men and therefor it interested me even less.

Richard Grieco over-kills his performance - as do the others, but I watched this for Grieco and was not impressed. Not that he is the best performer ever, but this was pretty bad - even for him.

Anyways, you'll see for yourself.

David Decoteau has made lots films and in them, some duds. This is one of the duds.

Watched it on Rifftrax and I was crying the whole time 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣