Not Without My Daughter

The story of Betty Mahmoody is a truly frightening one. The book she wrote and this movie based on it are controversial (many see it as little more than a racist slam against Iranian culture) but to me this movie came across as both believable and balanced. There's no doubt that life in Iran isn't presented as paradise, but the story really isn't about life in Iran; it's about one woman's experience of being forced to remain in Iran against her will after she and her daughter accompany her Iranian born doctor husband back to his homeland to visit his family, and about her subsequent efforts to escape Iran with her daughter. It also does a great job of depicting the almost complete lack of rights and freedoms women possess in Iran - having a status as little more than property to their husbands, and subject to their complete control.

Sally Field was excellent in the role of Betty and Alfred Molina was also disturbingly believable as "Moody" - her husband. As the story opens, the family are living a comfortable life in Michigan and Moody is a completely Americanized doctor working in a local hospital - a loving husband and father. Against her better judgement, Betty agrees to visit his family in Iran - a family more radically Islamic than Moody who from the moment they arrive begin to pressure him to stay and adopt their ways. Molina did a good job of showing the gradual changes in Moody's character and as he becomes more and more abusive and controlling toward Betty. Field superbly portrays Betty's growing desperation and her feelings of helplessness (and hopelessness) as every opportunity for her to escape with her daughter seems to close. Finally, with the help of some sympathetic Iranians, Betty and daughter Mahtoub make a mad escape attempt toward Turkey.

Whether all aspects of Iranian life and culture are accurately portrayed here seems somewhat beside the point to me. This isn't, after all, a documentary about life in Iran. This is Betty's own story as she experienced it and remembered it - and it's a story that makes the viewer ache for her as she tries to figure out a way to escape this nightmare she's caught up in. I found her story completely believable and brilliantly portrayed.

I have seen this movie a few times and in my opinion, I enjoyed it and didn't find it racist at all. This is what happened to Betty and her story.

Is she saying that this is how ALL Iranians are? No, just what happened to her. The movie didn't give Iranians all a bad name because who were the people who helped her to escape from Iran? They were Iranians. It was not like every single person she met in Iran was rude to her. She is just talking about her husband's family and the way they treated her.

Also remember this happened in 1984, twenty years ago. For people to compare Iran now to the Iran in the movie, it's totally different. The country has changed in the pass 20 years.

I fully enjoyed this movie and admire the real Betty's courage. As a mother myself, I totally understand her not wanting to leave without her daughter. I would fight to the ends of the world for my child and that is what Betty did for her child as well.

First, I would like to say that this movie pulled me in.. Akin to "Midnight Run" without the drugs.. they replaced the drugs with subservience.. Overall I thought it was a good movie!

If this movie is a true reflection of (Iran's version) Islam, I can't comprehend how any 'supreme being' can allow the total dominance of one human being over another!! We (as westerners) live (supposedly) in a world of equality and I have a hard time understanding how anyone can follow a religion that suppresses someone's freedom, to the point of slavery!!

This movie hit a cord with me, knowing what has transpired in the last number of years. With religions and beliefs all over the world battling against each other, (Jews/Muslims, Christians/Muslims, Hindus/Muslims, BinLaden/Freeworld)

I have nothing against Muslims, I have lots of friends that are Muslims. What I don't understand is how these 'radical' factions get away with what they do, without being castigated from their peers!!

"Can't we all just get along"

Cheers TheMovieWatcher..

Its only a movie!!! Relax with all the serious comments about the movie trying to put down Iranians. Personally I thought this movie was a great drama. Living in Iran is nothing like living in the USA. Imagine being used to all the freedoms you enjoy in the US and suddenly find yourself in Iran.

Here you are in Iran. Strange place, strange people, restricted freedoms. Okay I can handle this for a few days I guess. Then you are told we are never going back home. Woe!!!!!!!!! Talk about a sudden feeling of fear and anger. Sally did a great job of putting you in the driver seat, right with her. All I could do was root for her to get her daughter and get the hell out of that place.

As for the comments about the mother being selfish and not respecting his wishes. She agreed to go visit his family, and he lies to her tricking her into staying.

I agree this would have been a good Lifetime drama, but not a bad movie at all. I give it an 8 out of 10.

I can't understand why this movie was called racist! It happened and there is a prevalent problem with some child custody cases involving parents from different countries. I did read Betty Mahmoody's sequel book entitled "For the Love of a Child" . It basically deals with the aftermath of her escape from Iran with Mahtoob, but she also writes about other cases where children from such marriages (one parent from a foreign country) who use the international system to hold their children hostage against the other parent. I recommend this book more than "Not Without My Daughter" It shows the nightmare of losing your child to international courts in nasty child custody battles. I had no idea it was such heartache.