Blood Massacre

All I can say about this film is why has it not yet been remastered at put to blueray?. It's such a blast to watch this bloody fun unique horror film. I love the twists and how much awesome practical effects were used. It's got the whole crazed veteran thing, robberies, murder, cannibalism, home invasion, survival, twists, turns, blood, comedy. Man it's just great. I can't understand a bad review for this. It has so much going for it in such a short time. There are no full dragging points in this film. 2 million stars is my rating for this campy amazing blood soaked film!. Now please put this to blueray because it's a work of pure genius.

This long shelved ( filmed sometime in the mid 1980s ) shot-on-video horror begins with Cinemagic Visual Effects logo staying on screen seemingly endlessly, while mashing down random keys on a low quality synthesiser, before crummy 80s music from no-name bar band. Everything in this opening scene in the bar is filmed in close-up, and with a fog machine being used to simulate smoky atmosphere, making it difficult to follow what is going on, or to notice the cash register, which is seemingly left over from an old western from the 1940s. Lead guy then orders " Beer ". Not, for example, a Heineken ( my preference ) , he just orders a beer. I love it when a movie does this, as though there is only one single type of beer on Earth.

" 🍺 "

After drinking his * beer * , bar guy kills people, later meets up with a trio of thugs, they debate what to do next. " I don't give a f***, let's just do something! ". Indeed.

So, they rob a video store! While wearing their Kim Carnes '81 Tour shirts, with a Freddy Krueger standee watching, these morons rob a mom and pop video store, and kill one​ person in the process. The entire robbery sequence is silent, with more terrible, almost comical, music dubbed in.

Later, a witness by the name of Captain Obvious tells police, the killers are " gonna hurt somebody! " , after they've already committed murder.

The Last House On The Left plot elements kick in, as the quartet of killers hold up in farmhouse with a family held hostage, but the hostages turn out to be cannibalistic killers, more dangerous than the original quartet of killers, and the family hunts them down and kills them one by one, in slightly gory fashion.

Film then switches gears, and becomes a wilderness survival horror in final fifteen minutes, as the original killer bar guy is the only survivor, ( making the presence of the other three villain characters completely pointless ) and he must fight for his life in the woods, against this cannibal family.

This film then features one of the most baffling, " What the f***? " plot twists I've ever seen, as the cannibal family peels their flesh off, to reveal not only are they cannibalistic killers, but also unkillable skeletal aliens!

* speechless *

A sleazy gang hides out at a remote country house.Unbeknowst for them the family which lives there turns out to be killer cannibals."Blood Massacre" by Don Dohler is an okay low-budget slasher/cannibal yarn.The acting is surprisingly passable and there are some original ideas to be found here,but the photography is weak and there is not enough gore for my liking.However the film manages to be both entertaining and sleazy,so I'm not complaining more.It also offers some nice twists and turns.Don Dohler actually reworked the film as "Harvesters" in 2001 with George Stover now playing the head of the family.So if you enjoyed "Fiend" or "Nightbeast" you can't go wrong with "Blood Massacre".6 out of 10.

I'm guessing the only thing that got this movie anywhere was it's title. The title is pretty clever. What could be better than the words 'chainsaw' and 'massacre' being in the same title? The words 'blood' and 'massacre' of course. The box art was pretty awesome too, showing a head with some ribs on a platter. How could any horror fan avoid wanting to watch a film called "Blood Massacre" with body parts on a silver platter?

The case and title makes it feel like your picking up either a slasher film or brutal cannibal film. It's niether that. You got this gang of crooks that come across this family in the woods and they end up being cannibals. Sure, cannibalism is beautiful in horror films, but in this film, it wasn't very graphic like the box suggested.

Overall, the film is worth buying for the Slasher Film collector only, merely because of its rarity and its awesome boxart and title. But for entertainment purposes, don't expect much.

The most fun 71 minutes I've had in a long time! If anyone can ever get there hands on this one definitely give it a view.