Embrace of the Vampire

I place this film along side "Showgirls" as a truly indispensable guilty pleasure, this film is an absolute riot, you just can't keep a straight face. If you're looking for a plot, good acting, thrilling action sequences, characters that you can care about, a good script, or a memorable movie experience, then you're looking at the wrong movie. However, if you're looking for a soft-core porn movie starring Alyssa Milano's bare breasts, you're looking at the right movie.

Alyssa Milano gets naked. You see her nipples with amazing frequency. She lets guys touch her in dream sequences. She lets a female photographer touch her, remove most of her clothing, and then kiss her. But beware, Lesbian Sex Scene seekers - Alyssa does not go further than kissing. Yes, that's right - she loses her nerve and runs out of the room. Taking the time to get dressed again, unfortunately. So, if you're a fan of Alyssa Milano's breasts, then by all means rent this movie!

Overall rating: 6 out of 10.

The story, if one is to be found, is about a young college girl about to experience life for the first time. Turns out that she just may be the reincarnated wife of a late Count who never could cope with her death. Seems he returned home from battle one fine day only to find his beloved wife had killed herself on the false rumors of his death. Well, same Count becomes a vampire through some convenient miracle (because it was needed to have a shred of a plot) and then begins to pursue and court her in modern day. The rest is her inner struggle (alright, that's a stretch) between life, ghostly erotic dreams, voices, seduction, school, being away from home, falling in love, and clove cigarettes.

This movie started out with a really good and captivating plot; Alyssa Milano naked, involved in multiple erotic lesbian scenes. The only problem is that the producers tried to fill in the empty spaces of the movie with... a movie. Why didn't Ms Milano just film a short segment for Playboy or Spice and just be done with it?

Alright, seriously though... if you're interested in partially naked women kissing other partially naked women then this movie is for you. If you are interested in any other form of entertainment then I would skip this movie. The initial lesbian scene with Ms Milano and Charlotte Lewis does actually

come off as a good first time, nervous lesbian encounter for a young college women. (Not to mention the scene first introduced me to clove cigarettes)

All in all this movie is a shame; Ms Milano has undoubtedly proved herself a more then so-so actress. (I loved her in The Canterville Ghost). As for others, Jennifer Tilly does actually act nicely in my opinion. This isn't saying much but I do always enjoy watching Ms Tilly enjoy herself enjoying others in movies.

Nuf said.

Let's face it, this is one of the most famous B-movies ever because of a few nude scenes, not because of a terrific plot. Yes, Alyssa Milano looks great, but that doesn't mean that this was a good movie. Really, the film is watchable at best, and the writers clearly were more concerned with getting Alyssa naked than making an interesting story about vampires. I can't call it a disappointment, since I got what I expected, but it's nothing but a forgettable film that just happens to have some legendary soft-porn scenes.

Charlotte Wells (Alyssa Milano) is a good girl. She's a virgin college student. She is haunted by erotic dreams of being taken by a vampire. The vampire is centuries old and Charlotte has the soul of his lost love. He needs to reunite with her soul or else it will be eternal sleep in 3 days' time. Charlotte sleepwalks and is found by boyfriend Chris. Her friend Nicole tries to set her up on a fling and everybody is killed by the vampire. She is befriended by Sarah who talks her into an erotic photograph session.

This is noteworthy for one reason and one reason only. Alyssa Milano from 'Who's the Boss?' tried to break out of her former child star status. For the most part, she succeed into blowing it wide open. That photographing session with Charlotte Lewis is unforgettable and that white shirt is always ready to pop open. The story is thin and weak. Other than Alyssa getting naked, this movie has nothing to offer.

Alyssa Milano's breasts give a terrific performance here. They play, they dance, they utter soliloquies, they defy gravity (actually not really), and they photograph well.

The dominant presence of Milano's breasts prevent the vampire story from taking root. But all is well, for we need nothing more than the incredible anticipation of seeing the breasts in another well lit shot.

Life is indeed complete because director Goursaud has committed Alyssa's ample amples to the screen in such worthy style. Salancha senorita Anne, and the sangria's on me....