Clerks

This has to be my all time favorite comedy and one of my all time favorites overall. About three years ago a friend of mine came to school one day raving about the funniest movie he had seen on late night. He talked about this black and white low budget movie about two blue collar losers who talked endlessly about sex. From that description I wasn't anticipating a masterpiece but I decided to rent it anyway. It was probably the best surprise I have ever had. I was laughing the entire time, so much so that I nearly woke up everyone in my house. For months afterwards my friend and I would endlessly talk about and quote this incredible film. Everyone I have recommended it to has loved it and I can easily see why. I know that some people attack the movie as being vulgar and excessive. The way I see it it is being true to life (I'm sure that when you have 10 hours to kill you'll talk about the average pay of a gizz mopper). In short I absolutely love this film and it gets better and better with every viewing. Rent this film as soon as possible if you haven't already.

Kevin Smith has delved into action ("Mallrats"), drama ("Chasing Amy") and philosophy ("Dogma") in his Askewniverse, but Clerks, the first film of the series, is still the best.

Shot on a ridiculously low budget, using mostly friends and relatives as the cast and crew (see the line in the credits where "Boom" is credited as "whoever happened to be holding the pole"), "Clerks" is such a great film just because it doesn't try to be more than it is. You get the sense that this movie is in black and white not to be pretentious, but just because it's a prosaic look at prosaic lives.

Kevin Smith's real gift is writing funny, witty dialogue, and that's what carries this film. From Star Wars debates (did the destruction of the second Death Star in "Jedi" cost innocent contractors their lives?) to perfectly serious debates about sex ("Thirty-seven???"), this is the ultimate movie for anyone who's ever been going nowhere and doing nothing. It's a day in the life of the guy working at the corner store, no more, no less. But it's absolutely brilliant.

People either love or hate Kevin Smith movies. Chances are, if you can appreciate the humour of low-brow jokes about pornography as high art, then you'll enjoy "Clerks". His brand of humour isn't for everyone. This is his first film and it's flawed, to be sure. But in my humble opinion, it's still Smith's best.

Clerks is one of those movies everyone knows everything about even before they've seen it. The most fascinating aspect is probably the back-story: Kevin Smith sold his comic-book collection to finance it, shot it in the convenience store where he was working at the time, and cast his school friends in the various roles (two of them wound up playing three or four characters each). The film became a huge hit at Sundance, and is now widely (and justly) considered one of the best independent movies of all time.

The plot is quite easy to sum up: nothing happens. It's just a "regular" day in the lives of a few people working in or outside a Quick Stop convenience store. The fun starts immediately, as Dante Hicks (Brian O'Halloran) is asked to replace a sick colleague. This upsets him a lot, since it's supposed to be his day off ("You know what the worst part is? I'm not even supposed to BE here today!"). So now he has to serve a bunch of rather annoying or excessively weird people, with occasional help from his friend Randal Graves (Jeff Anderson), who "works" in the video store next to Quick Stop. Together, they discuss things like hermaphroditic porn or, Tarantino-style, which Star Wars sequel is better (Jedi or Empire?), and also try to find ways of not working, or at least make the day less boring (as Randal puts it:"This job would be great if it wasn't for the f**king customers"). Between these discussions, they also interact with Dante's present girlfriend Veronica (whose sex life causes heated debates) and ex Caitlin, who's apparently engaged to some Asian design major. And let's not forget Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Smith himself), two drug dealers consistently located outside the store.

Smith uses these characters to reference his favorite movies (the previously mentioned Star Wars, as well as Jaws and Indiana Jones) and talk about any subject in the filthiest way imaginable. Some incredibly outrageous stuff is mentioned ("jizz moppers", necrophilia, "snowballing"), but unlike John Waters, he never shows the events discussed by Dante, Randal et al. Everything occurs, or has occurred, off-screen, so all we get to do is have a good laugh, because no matter how crude it gets (the film is rated R for "Extensive Use Of Extremely Explicit Sex-Related Dialogue"), Smith's writing remains genuinely funny. Randal, in particular, steals every scene with his existential musings ("I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class. Especially since I rule.") or very politically incorrect antics (the top? Reading a list of pornographic flicks in front of a mother and her baby).

If you haven't seen it yet, do it, and fast: Clerks fully deserves its cult status. It has priceless dialogue, wisecracking characters and loads of swearing. What else can you ask for?

Clerks (1994)

**** (out of 4)

Kevin Smith's cult classic about a two store clerks (Brian O'Halloran, Jeff Anderson) who have nothing to do except be bored and deal the cards life gives them. It's hard to believe this film is now fourteen-years-old as it seems just like yesterday when it made a splash on the indie circuit. This was my first time watching this in at least six or seven years and it hasn't lost any of its magic. I still think Smith hit on something truly great in the fact that he manages to take this type of job and show all the hassles and frustration that comes with it. I believe it was Roger Ebert's review that mentioned movies never deal with jobs unless the job is that of a cop, robber or something like that yet here we get to see the life of a clerk who is stuck at a job he hates and surrounded by people that can't really add too much to his life. The real key here of course is Smith's screenplay, which I'd call downright brilliant. To have 90-minutes of nothing but dialogue speaks a lot for his screenplay as it remains so constantly entertaining with the majority of the jokes working. The politically incorrect nature of the humor from the "37" to various other sexual things is downright hilarious and that includes the surprise in the bathroom. The performances in the film have taken a lot of unfair heat in my opinion because while they aren't perfect I do think they fit the roles just fine and mixed with the B&W it makes the film seem all the more like a documentary.

Everyone has to start somewhere. Kevin Smith started his popular Jay and Silent Bob series with Clerks., a $50,000 film whose soundtrack cost more than the actual movie cost to make. It's poorly done, it's monochromatic (which actually works to its advantage), it's cheap, but it's funny, and that's all that really counts. The story is more than I thought it would be, and it's continuously funny throughout the whole short runtime. Many of the crude adventures of Dante and Randal are now legendary.

Dante (Brian O'Halloran) works at the Quick Stop convenience store. He's called in on a day off. His friend Randal (Jeff Anderson) works next door at a video store, but sporadically closes it to hang out at the Quick Stop. Throughout the day, various things occur, such as a gum representative trying to get people to stop smoking and chew his gum, a rabbi using the employee's bathroom (with an unexpected twist at the end), disrupting a wake, and the now-classic scene at the video store with "Happy Scrappy Hero Pup".

This movie has non-stop humor going for it. Whether it's Dante's or Randal's confrontations with the unruly customers (who seem over-the-top yet regular), their conversations about nothing (especially Star Wars), or their departures from their respective stores to play hockey or whatnot. I can see that Clerks. is to minimum wage earners as Office Space is to office workers. Dante's always a little timid when it comes to dealing with the unruly customers, but when Randal takes the stage, it's a lot funnier.

Although the parts about Veronica (Marilyn Ghigliotti) and Cairlin (Lisa Spoonhauer) weren't that interesting (except for the 36...make that 37 people), they were necessary, and seemed to create a plot out of this, basically, sketch comedy. It succeeded, and turned it into a great all around film. Most of these people had never acted before, and although it does seem like they're just reciting their lines (there's almost no break in between the dialogue), they do a good job at it. Sometimes it seems a little too scripted (for voice and diction, etc.), but for a bunch of first-timers, it's not bad at all.

Considering the rest of the series (besides Mallrats, which I haven't seen), I'd say Clerks. is close with Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back for the funniest Kevin Smith movie. They're also the two crudest, and the first and last in the series, respectively. But Clerks. will always stay as it was when it was released 10 years ago-revolutionary. It showed that money and action aren't important to make a movie funny.

My rating: 8/10

Rated R for extensive use of extremely explicit sex-related dialogue.