Prehysteria!

I was only little when i first rented Prehysteria on video way back in the early 90's & this little cute fantasy comedy has stayed in my movie loving mind since then.

I'm 38 now & just revisited this old school gem & was so surprised by how well it holds up today. It's 2023 now & this relatively low-budget family B-movie that went direct-to-video is as good and as much fun as anything that's come out lately. There's a magic to those old flicks we grew up watching & loving, there's no CGI, just old fashioned practical effects & puppetry & awesome stop-motion. Legendary B-movie producer & director Charles Band was behind this movie & many other's i grew up watching such as Puppet Master 1&2, Troll, Ghoulies Trilogy, Demonic Toys, Robot Jox, Dolls & Prehysteria. Charles Band had that awesome Full Moon features label that released tons of fun, fantasy & horror B-movies direct-to-video in my local Blockbuster. Prehysteria is a fun little light-hearted family Comedy that's full of fantasy & awesome miniature Dinosaurs. This gem has plenty of heart & that 90's innocence that's lost today. Not only is Prehysteria a nice bit of Nostalgia entertainment it's also a lovely piece of Escapism to a much better time.

A typical all American father & his two kids, a lonely young boy (the kid from Schwarzenegger's Last Action Hero) & his rebellious teenage sister live in a secluded farmhouse (like in Critters) & accidentally bring home a bunch of magical ancient Dinosaurs eggs. The magical eggs are from an expedition from an ancient underground tomb in an ancient jungle & taken by a collector of rare oddities. The collector & stealer of the eggs is played by the underrated & hilarious Full Moon Films regular STEPHEN LEE.

Stephen Lee was a funny likeable comic actor that i grew up watching in greats like Dolls & Robocop 2 & Ghoulies Go To College, he was a comic genius similar to the likes of Dan Aykroyd or James Belushi or John Candy, but never made it as big. Stephen Lee is the sort-of villain of this family gem, he's all about the money that these mini mutant Dinosaurs can get him & he's a hilariously silly character & a joy to watch as he wants those dinos back from the family. Of course the family love the little creatures & want to protect them from Stephen Lees greedy collector Rico Sarno.

Charles Band directed this gem from his family entertainment sub-label MoonBeam Entertainment.

The fx are wonderful & take you right back the fun & fantasy of being a kid with a wondering imagination.

It was so nice revisiting this feel good flick & remembering why i loved it so much as a kid. It was a hit of home video & i loved it.

Also the movie has a lovely playful music score by Charles Band's brother Richard, the guy is great & scored most of the Classic's from Full Moon Films like Demonic Toys & Puppet Master & Dolls for an example.

All in all Prehysteria is a lovely, sweet light-hearted family adventure that's full of fantasy & fun.

People can say that this was a bad movie, but I completely disagree. I thought that it was cute, although the dinosaur effects could've been better (ever see Jurassic Park?). Well, they wanted the movie to be cute and seem harmless, so they couldn't give the same vicious effects as "Jurassic Park". This movie is great, if you like animal movies (with dogs or cats) you might not like this movie, but if you like family-oriented comedies and dinosaurs, you might like it. I liked it, and I hope that somebody else does too.

We do movie night with my son (8) most weekends. He's always been into dinosaurs and I recognized the kid from Last Action Hero on the poster art. So I thought this would be a fun one for him. I was mistaken.

I can ignore generally bad acting in family movies. This however has a plethora of other major issues. Why are there multiple weird sexual situations and conversations? Why are there unironic threats of gun violence and murder? Why is the dad a total d*ckweed to everyone? But beyond that, it lacks adventure and anything even remotely pushing the plot along. This should really be called "jerky widowed dad yells at kids while he chases after a new girlfriend, while also grunting at her a lot."

The basic premise of the film, family accidentally discovers baby dinosaurs, is an easy setup for something good, but it's never delivered on. The Last Action Hero kid dancing to Elvis is truly the highlight of the film. Skip this one. Go watch We're Back, Journey to the Center of the Earth, or the Flintstones movie. All exponentially better family films.

Moonbeam is interesting because with it Band finally admits the childish nature of his comic booky stories and his trademark whimsical tone, now without the irruption of sex and violence present in the average Full Moon outing.

A nauseating sitcom family dynamic is at the center of the picture, injected with the derivative dilemmas of children's fiction, even with a trite and underdeveloped backstory of grief that sometimes comes up whenever the script requires it (this whole "missing parental figure" thing also troubled the child protagonist of The Seven Faces of Dr. Lao (1964), where the void was also filled by a showcase of special effects and stop motion). A charmingly naive fantasy tale done in a post-Spielberg/Dante era, with the rowdy spirit found in the tamest scenes from Gremlins (1984) but without the satirical perversion of childish iconography and subjects. Band's film maintains it's purity and childishness without allowing it to be contaminated by dreadful morbidness, grossness or violence of any kind, every punch and firearm shot is clean and harmless, every "adult" joke is safe and restrained, every conventionally attractive adult that's single falls in love with another one, and every piece falls into place without any problem or trouble. There's no place for verisimilitude in the childish fantasy.

The real stars are obviously the David Allen-made micro-beasts, who engage in the typical disastrous misadventures and cutesy little shenanigans these movies require. Dino-puppies extracted from the likes of Beethoven (1992) and its sequels. Perhaps one of the most interesting things is the way the Bands portray the dino-doggies, with a crushing ordinariness, their reveal occurs with the utmost cinematic casualness, from one shot to another, one cut it's all that's necessary to reveal them, as opposed to the typical Spielbergian procedures seen on Gremlins, where the search for a particular effect and emotion forced the direction to employ shots specifically constructed and timed to convey a certain feeling (the tilted and moody shots of the Gremlins hatching for example) but Band opts to dispose of all of that, never even accentuating an emotion. The reactions humans have to seeing the dinosaurs are no different. There's no true questioning of the little creatures aside from simply pointing out their strange appearance in the house. The small reptiles are shot and framed as simply another element of daily life, inhabiting the frame as naturally as any puppy or cat does. Never seen with strangeness or making them disturb the world created. There's no place for the questioning of the fantastical in the childish fantasy.

The old school model seems transported from the 50's and 60's, mostly untouched, perhaps out of the inability of father Band to adapt to the times, or perhaps the son's nostalgia is the one responsible for such backwardness. As with most of Band's catalog, the core is an old model that becomes slightly modified by the popular tropes of the time, but it's mostly undisturbed by modern sensibilities or worries.

Prehysteria has no objective other than purifying the children's film, while Jurassic Park (1993), Gremlins (1984) and Goonies (1985) pushed the limits of the subgenre, maturing and occasionally pouring a few drops of meanness and intensity into their stories, Band brought back naivety to it, a deliberate and shameless naivety, always conscious of it's tone and with total conviction to it, self conscious but not self deprecating, proud of an obsolete cinematic infantilism.

The best and most fitting start for Moonbeam.

Every character in this film is detestable. The dialogue is just constant bickering. When the family is arguing in the car I just wanted them to all start pushing each other out into the road. No one is even remotely likable. Every characters IQ is far below 70. You keep asking yourself, "Why can't the dinosaurs grow full size and just eat all these people???"

With that said, there is one redeemable quality to this movie. If you like to have a laugh at bad movies (Mystery Science Theater 3000, Rifftrax, etc..) then this could be a good option. If you have a kid obsessed with dinosaurs I guess they might find it interesting, although doubtful.

This film doesn't warrant the character limit required for this review and so to pad it out I will touch upon the top three memorable scenes in this movie. Spoiler alert.. there aren't any.