Pocket Ninjas

This movie is, flat out, atrocious in every way. The acting is awful, the stunts are laughable, the fights are very poor, there is no plot, and what little plot that exists is ridiculous. However, I highly recommend it as a tutorial on how not to make a movie, and for any big group of people who wants to end up rolling on the floor laughing.

I am a big fan of bad movies, and my friends and I often rent or buy bad movies and make fun of them together. I was at the mall a few days ago and saw this on DVD for 5 dollars. I laughed at the cover and bought it without thinking twice. It definitely gave us something to make fun of. The plot of the movies jumps around a lot, and it was really hard to tell what was happening. We almost fell on the ground when we first found out who the evil boss is. The movie is extremely random and the acting is hilariously bad. Also, the sound on the DVD is really really dim and hard to hear. It is a horrible movie, so if you are a fan of them, you might wanna check it out.

BTW: It said it was made in 1994 in the beginning, but I trust IMDB more than them. Either way, it seemed like it was made in the early 80s at best.

What a HORRIBLE movie. The dialogue sounds like it was written by a 7 year old, the acting is atrocious (you can tell the people are reading off the script), there is absolutely no plot whatsoever, new characters are introduced out of nowhere and they don't even have a purpose to being in the movie, the camera work is laughable, the action scenes are the worst I have ever seen in my entire life, editing was so bad it was noticeable when scenes were cut out and replaced, the music was terrible (it didn't add anything to the scenes it made the scenes even more confusing and horrific), and the wardrobe was just rediculous (In a bad, bad way). What's up with all the karate scenes that are repeated over and over and over, they aren't even different karate scenes, they are exactly the same ones we are shown from the beginning to the end. If it weren't for those cheezy, depressing, fighting scenes, the movie would've been 10 minutes long as my roomate said. All in all, this deserved a 0, but I had to give it a 1 because there is no lower score. I hope whoever made this film was really, really, high and just decided to make a joke film, because if it was a serious movie, wow I feel bad for him.

Pocket Ninjas is one of the few movies that is so bad it's good. Most of the movie is flashback, but poorly done and confusing. The plot has more holes than the finest swiss cheese, and it takes 9 minutes for the opening credits to end. I personally found the patty-cake "battle" between the White Dragon and one of Cobra Khan's cronies in the carnival absolutely hilarious. The location for this movie is perfect. The dojo is right next to a liquor store, but nobody seems to mind. The training sequences are long, obnoxious and downright painful. This is quite possibly the worst "professional" production I have ever seen. All in all, the perfect formula for the perfect awful movie.

And this year's Oscar goes to.......Pocket Ninjas!! Ladies and Gentlemen, forget Million Dollar Baby, Ray, and Sideways, they don't even compare to this wonderful movie directed by Dave Eddy. One could say that salvation could be obtained just by watching half a second of this movie.

Between the fantastic lighting, brilliant sound, and with a villain no older than 10, this movie combines fantastic writing (like "You're not only a dumb blonde, but you're a vegetarian" and "Oh yeah, well you're a fat Republican") you're bound for a four star movie.

Honestly, this very well could've been the worst movie I've ever seen in my entire life. If you and a few buddies want some gut-wrenching laughs, however, or you're just a big fan of bad movies, I would highly recommend this movie and all its hilarity.