Hard Hunted

Of course, you could pretty much take any other Andy Sidaris movie, cut it apart, move around the generic chases, gun fights and explosions, add a few minutes of explanatory dialogue and presto! A sequel. This is pretty much how I felt about this follow-up to Do Or Die. It's really the same movie, except here Cynthia, Dona and Roberta wear slightly different outfits (which they strip off just as frequently), and are now hunting the bad guys rather than being themselves hunted. This time around, the minions of crime kingpin Kane (no longer played by Pat Morita, who was busy making better movies) are trying to deliver a nuclear trigger to terrorists, or some such nonsense. I forget and anyway who watches these things for the story lines?

It's all tedious crap, of course, but then every Sidaris movie plays like a low rent T&A version of Chips or some other bad 70s TV action show, but with worse acting and dialogue, and shoddier action sequences and explosion effects. Nevertheless, he knows what his audience wants: bouncy Playmates showing off a lot of skin while shooting it out with bad guys, and he delivers the goods. You have to give the guy credit for truth in advertising if nothing else.

After the surprisingly entertaining Do or Die, Andy Sidaris slips back into mediocre mode for Hard Hunted, an unspectacular espionage/action tale that see his sexy federal agents from the Hawaiian paradise of Molokai tasked with recovering a nuclear weapons trigger hidden inside a small jade statuette.

There's a bit more to the plot than that, but let's be honest... you didn't come here to find out about the intricacies of the storyline, did you? What you want to know is if film delivers when it comes to cheesy action, big-breasted babes in skimpy outfits brandishing guns, and soft-core sex scenes.

The answer is that there is certainly lots of T&A on show, with series regulars Dona Speir, Roberta Vasquez, and Cynthia Brimhall all stopping for a spot of nookie amidst the gunfire and chases, but the action scenes are, for the most part, rather disappointing, with only Al Leong in his rocket-launching gyro-copter (which makes some seriously strange noises as it flies) providing the kind of dumb fun we've come to expect from a Sidaris movie.

4.5 out of 10, rounded up to 5 for IMDb.

HARD HUNTED is another one of those low budget sexploitation epics by Floridian filmmaker Andy Sidaris, whose entire career consisted of sticking models in bikini and having them shoot off guns. This film's entire reason to exist seems to be based on a single sequence of a ditzy blonde shooting a helicopter at the climax, and the plot preceding that is some silly guff involving a stolen jade statuette with some top secrets plans hidden inside it, or whatever. The actresses can't act for toffee but prove more than willing to constantly strip, while the male talent involves lacklustre offspring (the lookalike sons of Roger Moore and Gregory Peck) and top screen henchman Al Leong in a stock role. It's cheesy, not very good, but you could do worse.

Well, this was the first Andy Sidaris movie I ever saw, and after seeing it I want more! This is a very underrated movie.. I can't see how anyone could dislike this one. Sure, the people who made this movie aren't big artists, but they know how to make a fun and entertaining movie.

I would compare this movie to the new Charlies Angels film, except this has 7 girls, and they all get naked! Theres lots of explosions and gunplay, sure, the lack of budget shows in them badly but that adds to the fun.

Although Dona Speir is top billed in the movie, Brimhall, Vasquez and Mullen are the hottest of the bunch. Oddly the only girl who is not so well endowed gets killed early in the film...

I would recommend Hard Hunted for everyone, at least to those who watch something like Temptation Island just to see boobies. This is much more fun than that, I promise.

The seventh in Andy Sidaris' series of gorgeous gals-as-secret agents films, which by this point were being cranked out on a yearly basis. For some reason known only to writer/director Andy, Roger Moore's son Gregory (billed here as R.J. Moore for yet ANOTHER unknown reason) plays Kane, the ASIAN crimelord played by PAT MORITA in the previous entry ("Do or Die," 1991) in this series. Evil criminal mastermind Kane has stolen a nuclear trigger, an act of terrorism so despicable that it requires multiple, enormous-chested female federal agents to get naked as often as possible in an attempt to restore the balance of power! OK, the plot is negligible, as it's the gunplay, explosions, and softcore sex that are the proven formula of this series, and on those Andy delivers big-time. Look for the DVD release on March 25, 2003.