The Pick-up Artist

The good things first (sing this): Summer in the city!, and the city, New York, the one star in this movie that looks good 'til the very end, is just beautiful. And because it is summer, and because the city looks as good as the women that populate it, we do not ask that whatever Robert Downey is up to in the beginning is in any way "realistic", as long as it is carefree, funny, and playfully energetic. But from then on...

I do not ask of a movie that it be literally truthful, however, there should be some inner truth, a veracity in the characters or a thoughtful comment on life or something--and this movie does not have any of it. It seems that most of the characters are caricatures, such as the alcoholic gambling father, the mafia bad guy and his entourage (a whole armada with Italian accents), the corrupt policeman, and the Columbian rich man; nobody is in any way real, not even three-dimensional. (I did like the bad guy's girlfriend though, probably also a caricature, but at least flirty, lively, and refreshing.) On top of that, our romantic couple has no chemistry (at least not any I can detect), always deadly for a romantic comedy. The philosophic sentences about life and relationships that come out of our protagonists' mouths are, well let's say, completely beside the point. They are probably supposed to show that our characters are "serious", and maybe if I was 16 again, I would find these parts of the movie "deep", but at my age, I just find them false and somewhat annoying.

So, if you have seen this movie already, I hope you enjoyed the city, the summer, Robert Downey... and maybe some thing or other that I have missed.

Robert Downey Jr. is husky and young and wiry as a streetwise ladies' man who does more striking-out than scoring, but his attempts are colorful (you can sense he turns women on just by attempting); Molly Ringwald is a good screen-match for Downey playing sassy tour guide whose alcoholic father is in trouble with the mob. So far, so good--and early on director James Toback displays a sweet, screwball side that was never apparent in his works prior to this--but, unfortunately, the convoluted script gets all gummed-up by the second-half, and the leads go back and forth with each other so much that it all becomes fairly ridiculous. Some pre-release dubbing was obviously done to cover the saltier dialogue passages; it looks sloppy, but that's nothing compared to listening to Downey and Ringwald having sex (what was she in real-life, 17?). These two look good together but are far too young for this scenario, which is by turns cartoonishly sordid and melodramatically soapy. *1/2 from ****

One plot device that the movie turns on is absolutely unbelievable. I won't spoil it, but it stands out like a sore thumb. The opening twenty minutes or so are nicely done as the two leads get to know one another, sort of. After their lives are revealed to each other things get very dull and I can't get past the inanity of this plot point.

I thought Molly Ringwald was good in her role, what there was of it. The script is awful and that's a good deal of the problem, but there's no chemistry here, either.

I found the chemistry between Ringwald and Downey, Jr. to be as scintillating as that of Bruce Willis and Cybill Shepard of Moonlighting fame. I do agree that this film was probably designed to showcase Ms. Ringwald's talent, but in the process, showcased the charisma and talent of Robert Downey, Jr.

I first saw this film right after high school. It was light and entertaining. These days, the teen flicks bore me to tears, but I can honestly say that Downey's performance pulls me to the small screen time and time again. It's not a must see, but the sparks flying between these two stars make it quite enjoyable.

Here's a kind of too blander film with not much ingredients, yet is steered by Downey's likable winning performance. He has such a charming magical persona, and it comes over so well here. If only he did a better film. I have a few qualms about the movie, but I don't hate it. I just don't think it was utilized property, just running at 78 minutes, with some stuff that seems to be desperately crammed into it. Downey plays a womanizer/kid's school teacher with a regular pick up line, which is the one memorable line of the film. Most of the good dialogue is given to Downey here. Then suddenly he spots her, Randy (Ringwald, not bad here, quite a maturing professional actress). She's a museum tour guide, who's washed up boozer of a father, with a heart, Flash (Hopper, the film's other top performance) is indebted to a mafia guy (Keitel, Ringwald's older boyfriend), that has her doing some implied whoring. Downey must come up with a heavy sum, to become her prince and save her, but also, manning up too. Really, so much more could of gone into the characters, especially Ringwald's, where I just thought the mafia tie felt wrong, where again, the film's story wasn't utilized properly, in it's attempt to take it's subject, seriously, where the whole thing seemed like a half ingredient film, despite it's great and good performances, some actors painfully wasted. But like I said, it Downey's charm and splendid performance that carries a kind of dull running comedy with edges of drama. It's his soliloquy scenes that are the best, one hot beauty in blue, he chats up, I'll never forget, pre Vanessa Williams.