It's Alive III: Island of the Alive

Personally,I didn't see a single boom shot in the whole extravaganza.There were some shots that were incredibly out of focus,but it turned out they were deliberate choices by the filmmakers.Parts of this film are actually wickedly funny,as all horror films should be.I couldn't help thinking though while watching this film that it might have actually been quite terrifying if the babies just looked like real babies!

The most interesting thing about this film was seeing Golden Globe and three-time Emmy winner Michael Moriarty rant and rave about the fact that they wouldn't leave his child alone. I just can't look at Moriarity without seeing Ben Stone from "Law and Order." Seeing him on the other side arguing before Macdonald Carey (also a two-time Daytime Emmy winner for "Days of Our Lives") to save that butt-ugly child of his was hilarious.

But, it gets even funnier as he tries to save his child and, ultimately, his grandchild. He should be Parent of the Year for loving those creatures. Karen Black is his ex, the mother of the monster, and, well, you just have to see how that ends.

Making a comedy out of these things is genius.

Larry Cohen returns after nearly a decade to finish off his mutant baby trilogy with mixed results. Stephen Jarvis (Michael Moriarty) battles in court for the rights of the mutant baby he had with his wife Ellen (Karen Black). The sympathetic judge orders all of the babies to be placed on an island. 5 years later, a scientific team gets together to visit the island and check the progress. Naturally, Jarvis is brought along because of his ability to communicate with the mutants.

Cohen certainly has tons of ideas with this one. This is a court room drama, KING KONG adventure, and urban chase thriller all in one. Heck, he even throws in an out of nowhere tangent where Jarvis ends up in Cuba. I would say maybe 50% of the ideas work, with the island stuff (shot in beautiful Hawaii) being the highlight. Cohen is also betrayed by the FX for the grown mutants, which look like the babies on steroids. Moriarty also gives quite a performance as the sarcastic Jarvis. There is a great cast alongside Moriarty and Black including Gerrit Graham, Laurene Landon, and director Neal Israel. Also, Cohen regular James Dixon returns in his biggest role to date as Lt. Perkins, the only character to appear in all three films (outside of the killer kids).

Never before has such an atrocity been sinned upon celluloid. The acting, writing, directing and special effects are so terrifyingly laughable that I hovered on the brink on insanity as I watched the "story" unfold. The microphone bobs into shot so many times it's almost a regular character, and it has more screen presence and charisma than the rest of the cast put together. Everyone responsible in any part for this film should never be allowed to work in the motion picture industry again.

Probably the best film ever made about bad stop motion mutant babies living on an island.

Starring: Michael Moriarty and Karen Black.

A TV actor is plagued with a mutant baby that he wants to live. The mutant babies are sent to an uninhibited island. 5 years later the washed up actor is a shoe salesman because no one will hire him, and he decides to find his baby, and make a trip to the island. Once on the island, he learns that the babies have grown up, and the baby wants to meet it's mother (a waitress played by Karen Black). Before the trip to the island this film is quite entertaining, and once on the island it becomes extremely stupid. I was entertained enough through the movie, but it gets stupider than any of the other films. It seems as though the gore and language were amped up a level. Overall it was stupid, but it's entertainment value made it on the same level as the other 2 films.

My rating: ** out of ****. 94 mins. R for Language, Violence, and some Sex.