Evil Spawn

How do you make a bad movie even worse? Apparently you hire Ted Newsom, give him a camcorder and put him under the not-so-watchful eye of producer Fred Olen Ray. Here we have the very fun Grade-Z classic EVIL SPAWN (1986) by director Kenneth J. Hall reedited and with new and pointless inserts shot on tape. The new scenes feature Jay Richardson and Suzanne Ager as cops sitting in a car talking, eating doughnuts and fighting an awful hand-puppet monster, Gordon Mitchell sitting at a desk on the phone and Richard Harrison turning into an pathetic rubbery monster and ripping Melissa Moore's top off. Scenes from the original film easily provide the most entertaining moments in this version, so you might as well seek it out. Forrest J. Ackerman is seen briefly in the old and the new footage.

EVIL SPAWN (original version): 5 out of 10

New footage contained on THE ALIEN WITHIN: 1 out of 10

Where to begin?

First, you have little or no coherent plot (it was only due to this site I found out about the spore thing), a mad scientist who isn't so much mad as decrepit, special effects that aren't and seemingly random characters who stumble into the dire mess with little or no regard for coherency.

As a final warning to people, consider this cautionary tale: On the British video release, it says on the back cover "The scenes depicted on this sleeve may be an artist's impression & may not necessarily represent actual scenes from the film". Hurm. Presumably this is so they can't get sued by the thousands of raging customers demanding a real film.

Now, I knew about the movie from its title, but I have never actually had the opportunity to sit down and watch it. So when the opportunity presented itself here in 2024, of course I opted to check out the movie. Maybe I had been missing out on some late 1980s gold.

Turns out that I had indeed not been missing out on gold here. The movie was semi-watchable at best.

I am sure that writers Kenneth J. Hall and Ted Newsom put together what they deemed was a good script. But the transition from script to screen just wasn't successful. It was a rather mundane movie to sit through. And I have to admit that I didn't care one bit about any of the characters, much less did I actually remember their names.

I wasn't familiar with the cast ensemble in the movie. But it should be said that the acting performances were fair. Nothing grand or memorable here, but it was fair enough given the material they had to work with.

Visually then "Evil Spawn" wasn't a good movie. The effects were cheesy. But not among the worst of effects I've seen in movies, and that is even in movies newer that "Evil Spawn".

The intro sequence with Fred Olen Ray and his wife was seriously some of the worst garbage I've ever seen. I don't understand why that rubbish even made it to the movie. It was so cringeworthy and painful to witness.

"Evil Spawn" is not a movie that I would recommend to horror sci-fi fans, nor to fans of the cheesy 1980s movies for that matter. And it certainly isn't a movie that I will return to watch a second time.

My rating of "Evil Spawn", from directors Kenneth J. Hall, Ted Newsom and Fred Olen Ray, lands on a three out of ten stars.

... is in the first fifteen minutes of the movie. Some woman who's about to get chowed down on by some unseen evil opts to take the suicide route. She jams a gun into her mouth and get this... they cut to a shot of the wall behind her, brains and muck splatter the wall and a second later, you hear the gunshot. Give the sound editors a friggin' award! I rented this over ten years ago because my friend liked the nude woman on the cover so much that he had to see it. I haven't let him live it down since. Avoid at all costs and I do mean all.

I rented this with a friend about 10 years ago. True, it is awful and cheesy, but in a strange way I kinda like it! Bobbie Bresee plays has-been actress Lynn Roman, who finds herself too old to be cast in the starlet roles of her past. In order to regain her youth, she begins taking injections given to her by Evelyn Avery, the mad assistant to the equally mad doctor played by John Carradine (Sad to see how bad he looks in this one.) Well, the injections restore Lynn's youthful appearance, but as an unfortunate side effect they also transform her into a giant rubbery insect which proceeds to suck the blood out of anyone unfortunate enough to cross its path! Before each transformation scene Lynn also spits out an enormous quantity of white fluid which kinda looks like... uh, anyway, you get the idea! The second half of the movie is basically devoted to Lynn, as the insect, taking revenge on every one who ever crossed her. About the worse thing any of these people did to Lynn was cast someone else in the roles she wanted, but that doesn't stop her from the low budget, and often quite funny, killing spree that follows. At one point she kills her shapely, youthful assistant for having long dark hair and the physique that Lynn is lacking. In the token gratuitous nudity scene, the assistant takes a nude swim that goes on for about five minutes before being killed. Funny how this giant rubbery thing, about twice as big as Lynn is, can come up behind someone and not be seen or heard until it is too late, despite the weird sounds it makes. In another scene, Lynn transforms and kills her agent. Moments later she is human again, and clothed, despite the fact that she ripped out of her clothes only seconds before. These are just a few of the many flaws that gives this film a warm place in my heart. Most of the gore is of the dimestore variety, indeed most of the budget appears to have gone into the monster effects. there is one very nasty scene in the beginning where a typical 80's yuppie has his arm torn out of the socket! Ugh! Still, if you like "so bad they're good" movies, you could do worse. This has become almost impossible to find, by the way. I had to do a great deal of searching before finally finding a website that had this for sale. Apparently there's another version of this called "The Alien Within", and I wouldn't mind seeing it either! Worth a look if you can ever find it. I'd love to see this on Joe Bob Briggs Monstervision show.