The Zero Boys

The plot is as tired as any in that a group of friends go off into the middle of nowhere to have some fun. Once there they happen upon an empty house and decide to impose on the hospitality of the erstwhile residents. Only the big problem is they are not alone mwah!

Now this starts off fairly lame as it is full of macho centric twaddle and the ladies have that big eighties hair and attitude etc. At times it looks just like a really bad MTV video of the time especially in the over long road sequence. However, as things get more interesting the group start to behave in a much more believable way and then the twists start coming and it is actually quite inventive – and that is where it pulls it back.

The acting is all OK with no one making a new space in their awards cabinet but they all manage to convince. If you want a no brainer then you could do a lot worse than this and the restored picture quality makes it look as good as new. If you want something high brow then steer well clear but for some big haired frights then this is worth a go.

A group of friends travel to a wilderness area to play a survival game. Soon they unexpectedly find themselves in a real-life survival situation.

The first thing movie fans will probably notice about this film is that the score comes from Hans Zimmer, who has since become legendary. The score is remarkable, and if this was truly Zimmer's work, it is among his most fun and moving scores. You will not hear another score like it. Although not widely know, Frank Darabont (who is now a huge director), got his start in the art department on this film. Marianne Maddalena, the right-hand woman to Wes Craven for most of his career, was also a production assistant for "Zero Boys".

Writer-director-producr Nico Mastorakis decided to cast largely unknown actors. Presumably, this was done for budget reasons. Despite this, he did land Kelli Maroney, who he now says was "never any trouble" and has nothing but high praise for her. Daniel Hirsch was carried over from "Sky High", but could hardly be considered a known actor, especially since no one saw "Sky High".

Among the main cast is Nicole Rio, who is a horror icon in her own little way. She does not have a long list of credits, but 1986 brought her both this film (her debut) and the better-known "Sorority House Massacre". Being that her father and brother were in show business, it is something of a mystery why she seems to have more or less dropped out before she ever got going.

The biggest name in the film (besides perhaps Joe Estevez) is Kelli Maroney, who is definitely a horror icon. She will forever be identified with "Night of the Comet". Had the 1980s horror boom lasted a few years longer, she probably would have gone from genre favorite to big screen success. Apparently she butted heads with the director on "Zero Boys", being more strong-willed than he was hoping for. He may have forgotten this.

Other reviewers have noted that the gruesome sequences anticipate the so-called torture porn horrors of "Hostel" and "Saw". And this is a fair assessment. The movie has an unusual scene of tone, starting out very light-hearted, but then getting quite dark. The 1980s slasher film often can be seen as dark comedy, but the torture scenes here are too gritty, too dirty to have any humor at all. This takes away from the enjoyment of the picture, but it does make you wonder if "Hostel" or "Saw" was in some way influenced by this grit?

Besides giving us a beautiful 2K restoration, Arrow Video has put more than a couple features on their 2016 blu-ray. We have audio commentary with star Kelli Maroney ("Night of the Comet"), as well as new interviews with Maroney, writer-director-producr Nico Mastorakis (very humorous), and actress Nicole Rio. And two music videos! Want to read more on the film? Check out the fully-illustrated collector's booklet featuring new writing by critic James Oliver.

***

The Zero Boys is a good, old fashioned 80's action/horror/comedy. It's also rare. I just found this one on DVD (if you believe that) and it's marketed as an action movie; the trailer, the cover art, everything. It does start out that way. The Zero Boys, Steve, Larry, and Rip, are the best at what they do: paintball wars. The movie starts with a great game of paintball. When the Zero Boys win, they take a vacation in the woods and stumble upon an abandoned cabin. That's when the horror starts. The action part is so good that I almost didn't want it to turn into a horror flick. It all works out though because the horror is just as good, and cheesy, as the action. It's actually turns into a decent slasher flick which creates an eerie atmosphere. The cheesy dialogue and the one liners are what really make the movie. Such phrases as "Jason old boy, are you in there?" and "Probably just a bunch of faggots living in the woods." make this one a classic. All through the movie I kept remarking about how much the lead killer looked like Martin Sheen. It turned out to be his brother, Joe Estevez. If you're looking for an entertaining mix of genres, catch The Zero Boys, if you can find it.

Title refers to a team of three male survivalists who win a war games competition and celebrate the victory by vacationing at a secluded country home with their girlfriends. Their fun is disrupted when they find snuff videos, a head in the freezer, a torture chamber in the barn and that several killers are lurking around the premises with crossbows, knives and machetes.

All the horror clichés are accounted for including a car that won't start, a sudden rainstorm, lots of false alarms, heavy breathing POV killer shots, booby trapped woods, people wandering off by themselves even after finding dead bodies, etc. If there are any missing, it's not from lack of trying.

Pretty dull stuff, but some now well known people got their starts here including Production Co-Ordinator Marianne Maddalena (who worked on many of the later NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET movies) and Assistant Art Director Frank Darabont (Oscar-nominated writer/director of THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION and THE GREEN MILE). Some of the music is by future Oscar winning composer Hans Zimmer (THE LION KING).

The Zero Boys is definitely a strange one. While it looks like a Rambo rip off or some sort of survivalist action movie, it really has a structure and cast more in line with the slasher movies of that same area.

A bunch of paintball loving guys and their girlfriends head up to a secluded cabin in the woods (which they don't own). Soon, someone is killing them one by one due to their tresspassing.

There are shades of the torture film when they discover that these killers have been recording their victims' final moments on video and playing them to taunt their current victims. Also, scream queen Kelli Maroney (Chopping Mall, Night of the Comet) is always a welcome addition to any film's cast and the film clips along at a great, exciting pace. It's a shame this one is lesser known that some of its contemporaries.