Hardbodies 2

The original "Hardbodies" is distinguishable from other '80s boob comedies by the fact that it is 1. actually watchable, and 2. has more nudity than perhaps any of the others.

True to form, "Hardbodies 2" features many bare breasts just in its opening credit sequence.

The movie boasts one beautiful starlet in a lead role, the apparently brainless girlfriend of the generic protagonist. She has a beautiful, expressive face.

The scenes that depict the filming of the movie-within-a-movie are unconvincing and unnecessary.

The nudity also starts to decrease as the movie goes on.

I'd be lying if I said my interest also decreased; I was never that interested. You don't see an '80s b-movie sex comedy - and a sequel to another one, no less - expecting a masterpiece. I just wish they'd kept up the nudity throughout the whole movie. That would have given me a reason to watch, and given the movie some notoriety. The plot with the movie being filmed is completely worthless.

Pointless movie about making a movie. No where near the flesh shown in the original, which was quite enjoyable and even had fun music. Not here.

It's always fun seeing the Pathmark guy though.

But it doesn't try to be. If you judge it in relationship to it's genre (coming-of-age teen nudie flick) it's - not bad. Bare bones plot and no characters worth remembering, but attractive models (they don't act enough to call them actresses) and a lack of false pretension or nudge-nudge-wink-wink sensuality make this worth a $1 or less rental fee. It's a guilty pleasure, like Moon Pies and cheesecake.

"Hardbodies 2" is harmless, aimless and plot less. I would add "brainless" to that list, but the movie-within-a-movie gimmick, although not done very well, helps it to narrowly escape that label. The scenery has changed from the California beaches to the Greek islands, and the only returning cast members from the first film are Sorrells Pickard (the bearded guy) and Roberta Collins (who at one point falls into a mud pit, bringing back memories of her classic catfight with Pam Grier in "The Big Doll House"). All the other actors are new, but apparently Brad Zutaut is supposed to be playing the same character (Scotty) as Grant Cramer did in "Hardbodies". This sequel lacks the energy and appeal of the first movie, and doesn't come close to matching it in the "hotness" department, either. Of course Brenda Bakke and Fabiana Udenio are both very pretty, but the Teal Roberts - Cindy Silver - Kristi Somers team is unbeatable. "Hardbodies 2" is not the worst of its kind by any means, but if you only want to see one of these movies, the original is the one to get. (*1/2)

I normally consider myself a bit of a tough guy when it comes to enduring bad movies. Somewhat in the way alcoholics build up a tolerance to hard liquor, I have a thick skin against terrible cinema provided there are at least a few redeeming moments. Inspired by nostalgia for late night cable TV, the only way to see nudity and real debauchery as a kid in the '80s, I decided to watch this wreck on an ultra cheap DVD. But it hit me a Mike Tyson (circa 1987) uppercut. I couldn't watch all of it. It's THAT bad. And I can enjoy basically any CANNON GROUP production (horrid cheeseball '80s action producers) ever made! A much better movie that accomplishes somewhat of what they were trying to do here is Summer Lovers featuring a very young Daryl Hannah. Or the original and much better Harbodies.

The entire premise of these '80s airhead summer teen sex movies is naked flesh, but at least some of them had a certain level of comedy or sexiness. But nothing here is funny, or particularly sexy. Brenda Bakke is absolutely stunning, but no one gets to do anything worthwhile because the movie is a failure from start to finish. I guess simply admiring her beauty is worth something (and most starlets did not have fake body parts back then, which is very refreshing). But overall, life is too short to watch movies like this. Or review them. Hey wait.....I just wasted.....uhh THE END.