Teen Witch

Teen Witch (1989) was one of those "white elephant" movies that I always found perversely entertaining. I'm like a moth drawn to an open flame whenever this movie is on T.V. I don't know why I like movies like these, but for some strange reason I do. The movie is an exercise in bad acting, gaudy clothes and inane situations. Personally I wouldn't have a movie like this in my collection but whenever it's on I'm there.

A teenage girl (Robin Lively) is about to have her sweet sixteen birthday. One day whilst having bad luck in general, she comes across a palm reader's abode. Seeking calm from the approaching storm she seeks refuge inside. The palm reader is a diminutive woman who reluctantly read the young lady's palm. She's learns from her reading that she's a descendant in the long line of witches just like herself. After learning that she'll be a witch with great powers after her 16th birthday, the woman takes her under her wing. Can she master her powers and make her dreams come true?

Overall the movie isn't all that great. In fact you'll feel kind of silly watching this teenage tripe. The movie has no real message and the supernatural angle is quite lame. When I saw this the first time I hoped something bad would happen to Robin Lively, but it never came to fruition. Oh well, if you really dig 80's movies, this one's for you. Others need not to apply.

Fair.

I can't help it--I love this movie. It's so adorably cliché and predictable that I get a kick out of it every time that I see it. The soundtrack is great 80's pop, and the songs keep playing in my head long after the movie's over. What teen girl hasn't wished she could "magically" put the "snobby cheerleader" in her place and walk away with the popular guy? Louise gets that chance when she inherits her powers on her 16th birthday and uses them to make herself "the most popular girl." Yes, it's a bit silly in spots, but it has fun dance numbers and great 80's hairstyles and clothes. If you love the 80's, you will enjoy this movie!

This movie is so bad, but made out to be so serious that it made me almost pee my pants! The highlight of the movie is the rap-off scene between Kiki and her crush who's "too funky" for her to talk to. "Top That" had me rolling! The cheesy lighthouse scene was equally as bad, as is the opening scene in Louise's dream on the roof! I even downloaded "Most Popular Girl" for memories, when the movie stopped being played on the Disney Channel. The acting is subpar, and so is the plot, but its so unintentionally funny that it rocks! This is a fun movie to watch and make fun of, but not to take seriously, or you'll only be disappointed! A good movie to watch with friends who want to reminisce about the 80s.

Louise Miller (Robyn Lively) is not very popular at her high school. Then she learns that she is descended from the witches of Salem and has inherited their powers.

First, what is up with that little brother (Joshua John Miller)? He is a terrifying mutant and it is hard to tell exactly what he is going for with those faces and voices. Oh my. And then there is the Rob Lowe joke, which is even funnier now (2015) than it was then (1989), given Lowe's departure from fame and triumphant return.

Somehow, despite losing millions of dollars at the box office, this has gone on to be a cult classic (allegedly) and there is a musical adaptation. Who is in this cult? But the musical makes sense, as there are a number of song and dance numbers that could be easily adapted. The film is not completely horrible, just somehow a bit off.

YouTube is guilty of bringing me to this movie thanks to the Top That rapping that's been doing the rounds on my suggested videos (and I'm not sure what that says about me and my and my algorithms).

I wasn't really prepared for the bizarre collage of 80'sness that was going to unfold.

The small psychic lady from Poltergeist, sudden moments of turning into a music video with really really bad lyrics, look at my many different, very much of its time, fashion outfits montages and sexual harassment that would lead to several court cases in today's world. (Although I will argue this film is a good case that the, 'female gaze', and objectification of men was indeed around in decades gone).

Everything about this film had me engrossed because it just would not be made today and it's so lame 80's it's hilarious throughout but also fascinatingly cool in a retro way.

I didn't really pay much attention to the story as I was to engrossed in the camp and comedic to care, but the plots is so basic you'll know how the entire movie will roll, at about the four minute mark.

The whole thing is a slice of nostalgia, even for those who weren't around in the 80's.

Want to step into the head of what a late 1980's 13 year old girl dreams being 16 is like, then watch this. Fan of camp, cult or pop culture, watch this. Want to see the guys actual tongue slide in out of the girls mouth in the kiss scene, errrr you can watch this as well. Like a bit of 420, smoke that then watch this.