The Loch Ness Horror

Oh Larry Buchanan, we do have fun! Other than B schlockers Attack of the Eye Creatures and Zontar the Thing from Venus, this is the next of Larry's movies that I have had the fortune of seeing. I haven't personally been to Scotland, but a lot of faux Scots accents didn't seem to help convince me they were there either. Is it just me or a magic trick how the Scottish accents drift in and out especially during extended dialogue scenes. Hey, they had to sell it somehow I guess.

Kudos to Doc Livingston for playing Scot eccentric Jack Stewart who provides the most entertainment out of the lot. Jack's daughter (played by Miki McKenzie) is nice to look at and has the best effort in sounding passably Scottish. I won't try to give away about the movie's main attraction, but let's just say that it has really shiny velour skin in sunlight..at least from the neck up. The nose bubbles added a nice touch.

Larry shows his ability to switch from day to night and back to day scenes. Hey, at least they got to shoot the film in sunny weather. Although far from a good movie, Loch Ness Horror is a manageable work by Mr Buchanan and definitely earns it's 'B' grading.

A few buddies and myself have the strange hobby of seeking out really horrendous and utterly obscure (for a good reason) horror flicks and then subsequently watching them under the influence of mind-broadening consumer goods like alcohol and/or soft drugs. Surely a lot of people do this, but they watch movies like the "Godzilla" remake, whereas we torment our eyes and brains with stuff like "The Loch Ness Horror". And, eureka, this is a prototypic bad movie! We open traditionally, with bag pipes music during the opening credits. This is, of course, to emphasize extra to us dumb viewers that the story is supposed to take place in the Scottish highlights and not in director Larry Buchanan's birthplace Texas. For that exact same reason, the cast members are seemingly also instructed to overact tremendously and talk with talk with atrocious accents. The American marine biologist Prof. George Sanderson arrives in Loch Ness with some brand new and highly sophisticated sonar equipment to track down the whereabouts of the legendary monster in the lake. Meanwhile, there are many other parties hanging around the lake, like a group of kids on a Science Camp (what a boring way to spend your vacation), retired army generals looking for a Luftwaffe plane that crashed in the lake during WWII and a bunch of thieves and failed scientists that are steeling the monster's egg. You would think that these numerous sub plots bring some diversity and excitement in the plot, but unfortunately that's not the case. "Loch Ness Horror" is an overall boring flick with only a couple of noteworthy elements. The monster itself, for example, is a delightfully cheesy creation with cute eyes and a smoky breath. His teeth also glow in the dark, which is quite useful when you're dumb enough to go out on a boat ride in the middle of the night. Near the end of the film, the remaining cast members were more interested in the lost Luftwaffe plane than in the monster, so it was about time to wrap it up. "Loch Ness Horror" is carefully recommended in case you're a fan of bad B-movies from the 80's, but be advised that it contains an overload of senseless dialogs and a bizarrely rushed ending that makes it look as if the film suddenly ran out of budget.

Something strange is happening in Loch Ness. The water is crystal clear, nor cold. A giant robotic plastic monster emerges and kills Scots! What is this movie?! First, I love reading stories about Nessie, sea monsters in general. When i saw this for sale, i thought it was a cheap rip off of jaws. No. It was terrible! The story was pointless, acting was 100% garbage, the only up side was the cool mechanical Nessie they used. It was full of inaccuracy, wrong locations, and bad everything. Not worth your while, just leave it on the shelf (or garbage can) you found it on. On second note, This film was shot in Cailifornia, not Loch Ness, a major diss to Nessie fans.

In the mysterious and beautiful lake of Loch Ness where it's the home of the fabled creature, a couple of Nessie hunters stole the famed monster's egg as the beast goes on the rampage killing people so she can get her egg back.

Entertaining and damn near hilarious monster movie with bad acting, laughable fake Scottish accents and a incoherent plot. But i think the monster is kinda believable unlike some reviewers which call the Nessie creature in the movie fake looking and there's some amusing sequences with the title beast in them killing people.

If you like MST3K and b-movies, then this is worth a look for it's a real guilty pleasure of mine.

Although I like some other films made by this director, this is the only one I ever paid to see in a theater. I never made it to the end before I walked out. The ad showed a neat-looking monster, but the puppet/parade float used in this film looks nothing like it. Actually, I didn't know this was made by the same guy who did THE EYE CREATURES when I went to see it. Had I known that, there's no way I'd have paid to watch it. Some movies are so bad they are good but this is not one of them.