Graduation Day

Pretty lame and awful slasher about someone killing the members of a high school track team after their star runner dies during a meet.

Christopher George gives a hilariously over-the-top performance as the track team's coach. I don't think ANYONE has ever taken track and field as seriously as Chris does here - not even in the Olympics. It's a typically divine CG performance, and if you are a fan of the man/the legend, you should run right out and grab a copy.

But we watch slashers for the murders (you know it's true), not the performances, and Graduation Day fails to deliver on most counts (there is one really good kill). True horror only comes during a performance by the band "Felony". Never heard of 'em? Watch Graduation Day and find out why.

GRADUATION DAY is not a "good" or original film by any stretch, but it has plenty that others of its ilk do not and is pure entertainment from start to finish!

Laura, a young high school track star, accidentally dies, prompting someone to start killing off the entire team for revenge. The black-gloved and sweatsuited killer keeps a picture of the team in a locker to X out the faces of those dead and kills characters in very silly ways (a pole vaulter jumps on spikes, a lanced football, a fencing sword through the neck...) So, who exactly is responsible? Just take a look at THIS roster of suspects (whew!):

Could it be Christopher George as high-pressure a$$hole coach George Michaels? E. Danny Murphy as Laura's disgruntled, harmonica-playing boyfriend? Michael Pataki as the school principal, who cuts an apple with a switchblade? Patch MacKenzie as the dead girls butch marine sister, Anne? E.J. Peaker as harried secretary Blondie? Vanna White (!) as a giggly blonde who discovers a corpse in a locker? Linnea Quigley as a pot-smoking teen tramp who blackmails the horny music teacher? Carmen Argenziano as a lurking detective? Virgil Frye as a narking, slow-witted cop? With this crew, is it possible to watch and NOT be entertained?

Make sure you don't overlook the THREE long musical numbers, disco roller skating sequence and flash editing cuts that make you think you're on speed. I think I like it!

GRADUATION DAY starts off at a high school track and field competition, where a runner named Laura Ramstead (Ruth Ann Llorens) drops dead after winning a race. Soon thereafter, a mysterious figure is hunting down and killing the school athletes.

At the same time, Laura's older sister, Ann (Patch Mackenzie) arrives in town for the titular event. Could there be some other reason for her return? As for other possible suspects, there's an entire school of red herrings to choose from. Especially, the explosive, overbearing coach Matthews (Christopher George), who yells his lungs out at every opportunity. In fact, all of the adults in this movie are either letches, idiots, or lecherous idiots!

The students aren't much better! They're as ridiculous as the means of their deaths, which include: death by sword, spikes, and football! Watch for Linnea Quigley as Dolores, who instantly sheds her top, as in most of her projects. Also, look quick and you'll see Vanna White in designer jeans!

WARNING: This movie contains intense "roller boogie" scenes, and 1980's "rock music" being played! Don't worry though, because there's not one second of this movie that can be taken seriously! Nope, not at all.

Co-stars Michael Pataki as the insufferable Principal Guglione...

If you love late seventies and early eighties horror/terror/thriller/slasher flicks, this one is a must see. It is in the same league as "Prom Night" and "Hell Night". "Graduation Day" captures a feeling, a mood, a place in time that only exists in the imagination. The music, the acting, the camera work, the characters are a way we can remember 1981. Movies simply don't have the qualities of "Graduation Day" anymore. There are rough edges here. There are simple characters and characters that are not fully developed. Is Ann, the victim's sister, a lesbian? This is only touched on a little during the story. Why doesn't the police office who investigates the disappearance of the victims dislike schools? How did the principal and his secretary begin their affair and what keeps it going? A scene in which a beheading takes place is intercut with a girl rollerskating who likes a lot like the Alice character from "Friday the 13th". As the initiated know, Alice beheaded Mrs. Voorhees. Was this scene a nod to "Friday the 13th"? Has anyone noticed this scene? What happened to Kevin's parents? Does he live alone with his crazy grandmother? They really don't make them like this anymore. I'm not sure if anyone even tries. "Scream" was said to have paid homage to "Graduation Day" and several other movies of that era. I am going to watch it again while keeping that statement in mind. "Graduation Day" is the real deal. Of all the "Halloween" and "Friday the 13th" clones it is one of the highest caliber. Christopher George, Patch McKenzie and the guy from "Fame" (I think) lend star quality. Today's independent films try to capture the spirit of movies like this.

Make no mistake - Graduation Day is no lost masterpiece. It's a bit slow, the acting isn't great, and the cheese is overflowing throughout, but there's some stuff to recommend.

A young track star dies during a meet and her fellow teammates begin getting slaughtered one by one. Is it the pushy coach? The victim's sister? Her boyfriend? The creepy janitor? Pretty much everyone is a suspect here, but the mystery is nothing to write home about.

Come to think of it, the death scenes aren't either. A lot of them are either off screen or blink and you'll miss it. This could be forgiven if there were better characters or a more interesting plot, but they're both pretty ho hum. The most interesting character is Anne, the sister of the dead track star, who appears to be our lead for a few minutes before getting lost in the ensemble and only appearing periodically. This leaves us without anyone to really root for or drive the story along, so it can be a bit of a slog to get through.

Linnea Quigley shows up and adds some fun to the mix, so there's always that. There's also an amusing death by football, which you can't hate.

Graduation Day might be a bit slow and not sure of which direction to take, but it's not the worst slasher flick you'll see.