Up from the Depths

Griffith, Corman's muse on masterpieces like "Little Shop of Horrors" and "Bucket of Blood", tries his hand at directing for a change at the behest of Cirio "Vampie Hookers" Santiago. Guess what, it's a Jaws ripoff, and it's set in Hawaii. Instead of Roy Scheider we get one rather gorgeous woman romping around and clashing with, not the corrupt mayor, but the fershlugginer resort manager, a mind-boggling, thrashing and mincing performance by some guy (Virgil Frye?) Every once in a while there are incomprehensible quick-cut sequences of crap happening underwater including this inflatable fish with Dorito teeth. The climax involves blowing the fish up by completing a circuit by reaching into the giant fish's mouth and connecting two wires. Just like in real life! Don't ask for an explanation. Stupid, yes, and amusing as such, but also kind of aggravating.

It has been awhile since I have seen this, but I remember it being bad in a very good way, campy as all hell. I laughed and laughed at the end when, to lure the sea creature to the shallows, they dragged a bleeding guy behind a boat attached to a rope! I found this at a video store a few years ago, and have never seen it anywhere again, not one they even show on TV anymore.

After reading about this film for years in magazines and reference books, I finally managed to track down it down some time ago at a local Blockbusters. I honestly didn't expect it to be good, but I had no idea how truly terrible it would turn out to be. There are a whole bunch of Jaws inspired cash ins out there for your perusal, the original Pirahna being the best, Up From The Depths being the absolute worst. What really gives this film it's claim to infamy is the astonoshingly bad comedy relief that pops up in the last half as all the goofy tourists head out to catch the killer fish. It's so bad that it actualy makes the work of Jim Carey and Adam Sandler look inspired. No mean feat to be sure. The great poster for the film gives you the impression that the creature will be an aquatic dinosaur or sea serpent. No such luck as all it is, is some kind of rare, deep sea fish brought to the upper surface via seismic activity. It's also not very impressive looking and the FX artist who created it regreted (years later in an interview in Fangoria) not having a good enough budget to craft a decent looking creature. One funny thing about the monster fish is that it shares a power that many other type of similar B movie monsters have, namely the ability to sneak right up on people despite being about 20 to 30 feet long. How do they do that? A week before NBC unveiled their terrible adaptation of Peter Benchly's "Beast," a local channel had the bright idea to air Up From The Depths. It's a tough call as to which is worse but I feel that "Up" gets the nod. File it under, "How not to do a Jaws cash in."

During my ongoing quest to track down literally every "Jaws" rip-off ever made (strange hobby, I know…), I already encountered numerous of truly horrible – yet highly entertaining – junk movies, but "Up from the Depths" most certainly makes it into my all-time top five of awfulness! This is your basic and by-the-numbers "Jaws" plot: tourists and divers are mysteriously disappearing nearby a Hawaiian holiday resort, but obviously the neurotic manager continuously keeps claiming everything's fine in order not to upset his guests, especially when a famous fashion model arrives at the resort for a photo shoot. Then, of course, the inevitable beach attack follows… The funniest part about "Up from the Depths" is that you'll spend most of the time figuring out exactly what type of watery critter we're dealing with here. It's not a Great White or any other species of shark. Nor it's a crocodile or any other kind of commonly known sea predator. It's a fish! It's some kind of over-sized and prehistoric turbot with two fins sticking out the water and an insatiable appetite for dumb and stereotypical B-movie characters. Following good old monster-movie traditions, we're gradually being shown a bigger piece of the creature with every attack, yet by the time it fully emerges from the water, you wish they would have left it all up to the imagination .The special effects look so unimaginably cheesy and pitiable! "Up from the Depths" starts off slow and a tad boring, but admittedly shifts into higher gear halfway through the film, when the manager puts a price on the animal's head and thus literally generates a cowboy round-up; There's never any sign of suspense to detect, even in spite of director Charles B. Griffith's attempts to insert a wannabe ominous musical score and hectic POV-underwater photography. Don't expect any gory smörgåsbord massacres or bloody make-up effects, neither. This is basically a comical viewing experience, filled with both intentionally and unintentionally hilarious situations. The screenplay itself contains several running gags (a constantly bickering elderly couple, the bimbo photo model not realizing she's on Hawaii, etc...) and the sheer incompetence of the ensemble production team induces even more chuckles. "Up from the Depths" truly deserves its embarrassing 1.8 out of 10 rating, but still I wouldn't hesitate to recommend it to tolerable fans of cheesy bad cinema.

This is a nearly completely redone version of Jaws, of course. The monster gets a 1, pretty lame big rubber fish. The script a 2, too much really bad humor that's tried to be passed off as wit. The supporting cast a 3, some are okay some are not, and the boy and girl leads get a 4, they really are not bad and handled their parts in such a grade C film with respect. The nice scenery of a remote Hawaiian island gets a 5 and the all around neat 1970s mishmash decor gets a 7, and not higher because it wasn't planned but was just there to be used. I mean just look at that hotel, with a 1960s angular pointy diner roof and greco-roman columns holding it up!