The New Kids

Teenage orphans Abby (Lori Loughlin) and Loren (Shannon Presby) go to live with their aunt and uncle in Florida, who run a combination gas station and amusement park. Abby attracts the attention of scumbag Eddie Dutra (James Spader) and his redneck buddies. When Abby rejects them, the punks harass her and her family. Loren tries to get even which leads to Abby being kidnapped. Now it's a life or death showdown vs the rednecks.

Not a horror movie like the poster implies but an action-thriller that sadly has nothing to do with New Kids on the Block. The '80s was a decade full of revenge movies. Most were more brutal than this. But I suppose that might make this more accessible than, say, the Death Wish series. The cast here is decent. Shannon Presby had a short-lived career but that appears to be by choice as he does fine here. Lori Loughlin is very pretty and personable. Every time I see one of her pre-Full House movie roles I have to wonder what the world was smoking in the '80s that prevented her from becoming a bigger star. We're also teased with a nude shower scene from her in this but, alas, it's just a tease. Carrot-topped Eric Stoltz plays Lori's boyfriend. I doubt I'll ever fully get his appeal. Eddie Jones plays the likable but irresponsible uncle ("Soon enough, we're gonna be fartin' through silk"). Tom Atkins appears all-too-briefly. The guys playing the rednecks are over-the-top goofy and not the least bit scary. The standout of the movie is, obviously, a scenery-chewing platinum blonde James Spader as the creepy villain. It's his movie, really. This was written by Stephen Gyllenhaal, father of Maggie. She would later have her first big role in Secretary, which starred Spader. Two degrees of separation. The gang of school toughs that back up Spader do not seem like the kind of dudes a guy like him would be hanging with. Something tells me the part Spader was cast for and the part he played weren't exactly the same.

It's an OK time-passer. Nothing terribly special but worth a peek for fans of '80s cheese. Dig the montage with generic rock music when Loren prepares for the big fight. Love the '80s!

THE NEW KIDS is top-of-the-line moviemaking with a gleefully sleazy gloss.

Cunningham, director of the first FRIDAY THE 13TH and the godawful DEEP STAR SIX, really does himself proud in this Southern-set rape/revenge thriller.

Two kids, whose parents have died, start a new life at their uncle and aunt's luridly low rent carnival.

Lori Laughlin, who plays one of the kids, becomes the target of sociopathic Dutra (James Spader in his best perf ever) and his gang of disgusting miscreants because she's so damn delicious looking. Essentially, the boys want her booty and will break any law to get it.

The film succeeds so well because it embraces its exploitation elements (sex, drugs, violence, teen lust, guns, vicious dogs) with such relish and delivers on its promise unpretentiously but stylishly. It is extremely well directed and acted and moves at a peppy clip.

You really do care about the characters and the film's Lalo Schifrin score nails the drama like a whore to a floorboard,

The carnival setting is a doozy and a triumph of production design; and the film's final scene has a black, perverse feel to it that had me nodding with approval.

A classic, and I'm not going to follow that with "of it's genre" because I'm tired of reviewers singling out films like this as less noteworthy because they're nasty.

Nope, a classic piece of cinema in anybody's book and titled STRIKING BACK in some markets.

"The New Kids" is about average for this kind of film: competently if not stylishly made, routinely written, reasonably rousing for its big finish, and full of characters whom you can either like or loathe. And the sides are pretty well delineated: there are the good guys and there are the bad guys. And the bad guys do their able best to show you how much they deserve to die. Director Sean S. Cunningham, who despite efforts like this will always be best known as the original "Friday the 13th" guy, does a decent job, working from a script by future director Stephen Gyllenhaal (who also happens to be the father of Jake and Maggie G.). This is mostly a showcase for the younger crowd, with most of the adult cast relegated to minor roles. Certainly there is some capable production design present here, as well as a good music score by the always reliable Lalo Schifrin.

Lori Loughlin ('Full House') and Shannon Presby (making his only feature film appearance here) play Abby and Loren MacWilliams, two nice, ordinary teens who end up living with their uncle Charlie (Eddie Jones, 'Lois & Clark') and Aunt Fay (Lucy Martin, "Cops and Robbers") in Florida. They become the targets of degenerate prick Eddie Dutra (James Spader, 'The Blacklist') and his gang of repulsive redneck flunkies. Things escalate until a bloody showdown at the amusement park that uncle Charlie operates.

Cunningham does work with a pretty good cast here, also including Eric Stoltz as nice guy Mark, John Philbin ("The Return of the Living Dead"), the great (and too briefly seen) Tom Atkins ("Night of the Creeps") as Abby and Lorens' dad, Brad Sullivan ("The Untouchables") as Colonel Jenkins, and John D. LeMay, future star of the 'Friday the 13th' TV series, in a bit part. Loughlin and Presby do make their characters likable enough that you root for them, and Spader, Philbin and others are just so disagreeable that one just can't wait for them to get their comeuppance. Jones is engaging as a man who's a bit of a dreamer. There is a degree of 1980s style cheese to these proceedings (we get to hear the ditty "Stand Up" three times before this is over), but it's all pretty absorbing up to and including that climax. The final death is fitting and effective.

If you're an animal lover, though, you may be taken aback by the actions of Dutra & gang.

Seven out of 10.

Don't let people sway you, folks. This movie is outstanding! It features some disreputable Southern stereotypes and death by roller coaster and lighter fluid, not to mention the brilliant actor John Philbin in a typically memorable performance as "Gid". The production values are strong (including music by the great Lalo Schifrin) and the script is fast-paced and doesn't waste time with nuance or subtlety. There are pit bulls, lazy sheriffs, authentic Florida tourist trap backwoods locations, a pre-"Mask" Eric Stoltz, and impressive mid-1980s fashions. What more can you ask for? A solid 7/10.

The New Kids is a likable eighties movie from veteran horror director/producer Sean S. Cunningham (Friday the 13th). There are quite a few flaws in it, but it's too much fun to condemn for that. I stumbled across it in the horror section, and yet, it's the furthest thing from a horror flick. It's more along the lines of Paul Lynch's Bullies really. It could almost be considered a thriller, but there's just enough cheese on the surface to keep it from being too scary. It's still well worth a sitting though. The great, young cast is fun to watch, including Eric Stoltz (Killing Zoe) and James Spader (Wolf), who is hilarious and evil at the same time as the crazy redneck, Dutra. Another reason I like this film is the presence of one of my favorite genre actors, Tom Atkins (brief as it may be). The climax, well, the climax makes the movie. It's very well done (especially the pit bull scene) and everyone should walk away pleased. If you're looking for an interesting revenge flick, rent The New Kids.