Hollywood Wives

I can only imagine that in the mid-80s actors like Anthony Hopkins, Angie Dickinson, Candace Bergen and Robert Stack must have all needed sudden cash infusions. For what other reason would they agree to star in a miniseries so ridden with bad dialogue that it makes "Saved by the Bell" look like Masterpiece Theater.

This little "gem" pops up on WE (Women's Entertainment channel) quite often and should be savored for the guilty pleasure it is. How often do you get to see (now Sir) Anthony Hopkins trade cheezy cliches with former "Three's Company" gal Suzanne Sommers? Or watch Angie Dickinson spit out venomous double entendres? For these reasons alone, this Jackie Collins novel turned movie must be watched.

Oh, and get a load of the late Rod Steiger's ATROCIOUS toupee! Where is Sy Spurling when you need him???

The 1980s were the heyday of American mini-series. Whether historical events or, as here, scandalous navel-gazing - every topic could become a complete series with three to six episodes. Filmed with great effort and featuring an all-star cast, these mini-series were marketed worldwide.

"Hollywood Wives" (the original title) is based on the novel of the same name by Jackie Collins (sister of Joan Collins, who was world famous in those years as Alexis from DYNASTY), which was published in 1983. It's about several women who have to do with the entertainment industry in Los Angeles and are of course involved in unsavory affairs and intrigues. So the full life! How one can be unhappy even in eternal spring!

Directed by Robert Day, the film stars Candice Bergen, Mary Crosby, Angie Dickinson, Steve Forrest, Roddy McDowall, Robert Stack and ACADEMY AWARD winner Rod Steiger. We see the wonderful Stefanie Powers as screenwriter Montana Gray as a particularly unhappy Hollywood wife. Her British director husband, who is of course not very particular about marital fidelity, is played by the later ACADEMY AWARD winner Anthony Hopkins.

Oh yes, and Andrew Stevens, who was still very young at the time, plays a hunky call boy for all the frustrated ladies from Hollywood's upper class.

The three-part series that aired on ABC in February 1985 wasn't really convincing. Too little heart, the viewer didn't care much about the characters. But the equipment was right, produced by successful producer Aaron Spelling (DYNASTY).

Never have I seen such great talent assembled for such dreck! A guilty pleasure that's all pleasure, Jackie Collins spins nasty rumors with deft improbability to create the National Enquired version of Hollywood. All it's missing is Elvis alien love child.

Suzanne Summers! Candace Bergen! Anthony Hopkins! Shoulder pads! How can you go wrong? Well, actually this mini-series is a whole world of wrong but thats part of the fun. I especially enjoyed Bergen's role as a compulsive shoplifter who lives in Beverly Hills. The movie is too long, too melodramatic but the sleazy characters and the campy dialoge will keep you laughing till the end. Once this trash fest starts I dare you to turn it off!!!

If you haven't read the book, you might enjoy this second or third-rate series with lots of famous names in the cast. But the book was really very explicit, so to make this sort of sugary series in which nothing untoward happens or is shown, no full-frontal nudity of either sex... I'm sorry! Utter disappointment, and a complete waste of time. I hope some streaming network might have the guts to do a remake, this time without the Victorian prudishness that is really insulting in this version. Jackie Collins deserves better, and so do we. Dressing the piano legs as obscene is hardly what was needed, even in the 1980-s.