Shark: Rosso nell'oceano

This movie brings up many question that may plague generations to come. Such as: Did a seven year old edit this movie? What makes the electrician so appealing to two woman? Why did the ultra-skinny dolphin lady seem attractive to Electrician and Beer-Drinking Euro-Tantrum Guy? Why did the US Coast Guard agree to let their helicopters be used in this drek? At least in the MST3K version, we learned that Devil Fish comes with a side of Satanic string beans and Deep-Lucifered potatoes, and that you shouldn't make fun of Blowie the dolphin! If you see this movie anywhere, run! Far, far away!

I actually saw Devil Fish long before its infamous MST3K showing. The majority of the horrible editing and pacing were actually from some kind of strange censoring in the print that MST used. There's a lot more gore and violence in th eoriginal cut. Now, don't misinterpret that as praise...Devil Fish is crap and I'm utterly blown away that Lamberto Bava ghost-directed this. Mario Bava must've spun in his grave. Granted, Lamberto has done some dumb movies, but Devil Fish is practically not even a movie...just random crap strung together with a bad storyline. The gore of the uncut version made it BARELY watchable, but not by much. It's still a hilarious movie, though, and MST did it right.

The monstrous star of 2010 CGI creature-feature Sharktopus is (rather obviously) half-shark-half-octopus, which probably sounds like a fairly unique concept unless you've been unfortunate enough to experience Monster Shark, Lamberto Bava's god-awful movie from 1984, which also features this particular genetic mash-up. Italian horror film-makers are renowned for following US trends, but for once it seems like they actually got there first (and by a whole 26 years).

Don't expect much else in the way of originality from Bava, though: strip away a poorly developed subplot about a shady geneticist out to protect the vicious sea-creature and what you have is just another in a long line of uninspired low-budget Jaws rip-offs, terribly acted, poorly directed, and much more likely to bore than to horrify.

Admittedly, the incredibly bad monster does provide some unintentional giggles, and supplies the film with a few moments of shoddy gore as it chomps down on its prey, and Bava throws in a couple of enjoyably exploitative scenes in which a murderous hired thug (played with gleeful menace by Paul Branco) bumps off a few defenceless victims, but these 'high' points are few and far between; for the majority of the time, Monster Shark is a dull, derivative mess.

It's a poorly edited film with lots of loose ends and plots that go nowhere. A hit-man character would be better off cut, if not for the scene where he strips an informer naked and throws her into the bathtub with an on hairdryer. There is some more hardcore horror with bit-off limbs and a decapitation where the man's body is inside the fish.

It's the popular view to think of the fish itself as being cheap looking. I disagree. It's pretty lifelike for an 80's rubber monster effect and a lot more enjoyable to me than the video game styled fish in 'The Phantom Menace'.

My review was written in November 1986 after a screening at Liberty theater on Manhattan's 42nd Street.

"Monster Shark", previously titled "Red Ocean", is a poor science fiction/horror film from Europe. Since Universal is planning a fourth "Jaws" epic, there's apparently some life left in this lame material.

Yank actor Michael Sopkiw gets involved in a hunt for a giant underwater killer off the Florida oast when he's hired to rig up some electronic equipment for scientists studying the series of gory attacks on humans. Eventually they discover that the culprit is a 15,000,000-year-old ancestor of the shark, 40-feet long and hungry. Worse yet, the critter's individual cells are capable of reproduction, meaning that if it isn't found and destroyed soon the ocean will be filled with the beasties.

Cornball film relies once again for the usual conflict between gung ho scientists (led by William Berger) who want to save the creature for study, and practical types like the local sheriff (Gianni Garko) who want to kill it. Monster itself is a very fake-looking cross between shark and octopus, wisely shown in its entirety only briefly on screen. Cast is peppered with pretty women, but the acting is miserable, becoming downright funny during some exaggerate death scenes or shrieking bouts.

Surprisingly for such a routine picture, five well-known Continental helmers are credited in various capacities, wit the Italian contingent (Lamberto Bava, the film's director, as well as Luigi Cozzi and Sergio Martino) hiding behind pseudonyms, while their French confreres, Max Pecas and Gilbert Roussel, are less shy.