Body Rock

The third hip-hop/break dancing musical of 1984 (after Breakin' and Beat Street) and easily the worst. In fact, it barely got released theatrically at all. Lorenzo Lamas stars and let's just say he's no Adolfo 'Shabadoo' Quinones. He's such an unlikable meathead douchebag you'd have to be a sociopath to care whether he's successful in his music/dancing career or not. The other big problem is that the film's music, while not necessarily awful, is in no way hip-hop. It's all techno-pop. Lamas may be Hispanic, but the movie definitely feels like it was made more to appeal to whitebread audiences (not that the other two movies mentioned above weren't also made for that audience, but at least they featured actual black music). If you want authenticity, go for Beat Street. If you want goofy fun, go for Breakin'. If you want to be bored out of your mind, go for Body Rock.

I found this movie at the local used record store for $2.95, and bought it for a friends birthday. Let's begin; Lorenzo Lamas heads a breaking (I used the 'g' because Lamas does too!) crew, The Body Rock Crew. They are just a bunch of kind hearted street punks who love to express their inner turmoil through the majesty of break dancing. Now; with that said the "film" begins with Lamas and company holding up traffic whilst they pop and lock across the intersection only stopping to oogle an '80's chick in unison. Then we see the crew hanging at their local dive putting on a dance, and rap show. Lamas is the first to rap, let me TRY to describe this; Imagine you have an uncle who is all things not cool, but according to your uncle he is the epitome of cool. Now imagine he shows up at your 16th birthday party dressed like a cross between Travolta circa Carrie, and an extra from Lionel Ritchies "All night long" video and begins to rap things like "And now i'm gonna do a rap for you,i'm Chilly, from the Body Rock Crew!!" On and on it goes, Chilly eventually bangs his best friend/Dj's little sister, gets famous off of his skills (?) performs a song (Smooth Talker) blows off his "homies", falls from grace and re-connects with his crew for a final "Rapstravaganza". If you enjoy all things '80's, laughing, and Lorenzo Lamas I highly suggest you and those close to your heart check out this Rapstravaganza!!!

Forget "Breakin'" and those other films featuring dancing chumps, they should bow down to the master: Lorenzo Lamas. Lorenzo Lamas as Chilly D displays an amazing break dancing talent, and his sexy rappin' and breakin' is incomparable and unforgettable. Chilly D wants to take his breakin' and rappin' talent to the masses who deserve to witness his titanic ability to rock the mic and tear up the trembling dance floor. Amazingly, he gains this mastery within the span of a hilarious training montage. Body Rock is essentially a morality tale about Chilly D's tormented desire for Hegelian recognition from the evil overlords of New York break dancing clubs. Unfortunately, after gaining his recognition Chilly D encounters a fate that befalls so many epic heroes; he gets caught up in the excesses of his lifestyle. I would dread to spoil the ending of this flawless underground classic, so see it for yourself and indulge in the mastery that enrobes this film.

Out of other break dancing movies, 83 to 84, this one went straight to the video shelves, missing it's chance on the big screen. Personally I think it would of bombed. This is a weird miscasting. I mean Lamas, really, a break dancer, are you kidding me? Well seeing is believing and he can. But his acting here is awful, the other actors, especially the older ones fare much better. Even Lorenzo's girl is good in this. Basically it's a story of ghetto surviving Lamas, being given this grand opportunity, thanks to his talent, to get out of Grotville and go places where he may have to sacrifice friendship and loved ones. Lamas, firstly strongly opposed to this, becomes manipulated, not wanting to blow this opportunity of a lifetime offered by talent agent Sharkey. A middle aged manager to Sharkey, (Frederick) doesn't like be dejected when trying to put her hooks into him, while dancing to a number, "Ohll Sex Shooter". We all know what follows, things start to go wrong for Lamas and he's in the pits. He redeems himself with his fellow homies and puts on a number and everything works out fine in the end. There's your movie input. The best thing about Body Rock, which is adequately entertaining, is the song. I loved it then, and I still love it now. Pity, I don't feel the same way about the movie.

I used to like Lorenzo Lamas in "Falcon Crest", but, after that, I haven´t seen him doing any good movie (or TV series). In this particular movie he was a very bad choice for the role, since he obviously can´t dance or sing. The movie is also very boring, the coreography sucks, and the only good music you will hear is the theme song "Body Rock", by Maria Vidal.

Avoid this one, but get the song if you can.