Gunan il guerriero

It's a good film, but there's not much magic or adventure. It's got an eerie opening with a sinister voice telling us how the world began, showing dinosaurs and then the arrival of humans. It showed a star nebula in the shape of a newborn inside the womb, which was space, that it would fulfil a prophesy about a son changing the world. This is really unoriginal concept, but I gave it a chance. The storyline is okay and doesn't dwell on boring background talk, which is great, as many films do that. The swords look plastic but it doesn't matter, its fancy fantasy. It was entertaining and also fun.

"Gunan Il Guerriero" is typical picture you see in your video store and think "well, what the hell could be that?" Italy is very known for copying sucessful ideas and well-known films and making awful and stupid sub-products like this but, at last "Gunan" is the kind of film you can laugh and laugh with their actors(?, actresses (?!) and FX (!!): Gunan and his brother (called Gunan, too) are two stone-faces, Gunan´s girlfriend character is only for be nude everytime and fights are... are... well, you must see it for understanding. I have no words.

I think somebody bought a video camera and decided to make a barbarian movie. Some of the "swords" look like tin foil cut into a sword shapes. The acting is, well, let's not discuss that . . . The fights are ridiculous, they don't even pretend that the swords are really cutting people. However, this movie's heart is in the right place. Whoever made it set out to make a movie about a big guy avenging his people (I think that's what was going on) and they did. No pretense, no self-importance, no pretending that this is anything special. It was made and, I bet, the people who made it were proud of themselves for the effort they put forth. Watch for the guy who looks exactly like Adam Carolla.

This movie had me perplexed at first. You'd think the script was written by a 9 year-old boy in the 70's. The writer, who was 61 years old at the time, managed to re-create a generic fantasy that was at least partly shared by every heterosexual preadolescent male nearing adolescence (6-9 year-olds) on Earth.

Don't you remember playing with your buddies and you did a jump? That jump meant something. That jump told everyone that you meant business and you were a terrible force to reckon with. That's why Gunan is always running and jumping and every single jump is in slow motion with epic music playing. That's how boys play make-believe. Actually, that's also how kittens and puppies play make-believe as well.

Do you remember how you imagined things on some nights? You were forced to touch the beautiful girl, or she was forced to touch you. You may have struggled and resisted, but you were so glad it happened. How long is the scene where Gunan and the girl holding hands and walking? It felt like 10 straight minutes. No dialog, just dreamy music while the two walked through a meadow holding hands and smiling. That was practically porn when you were 7 and you know it.

Watch it one more time, and try to remember... I can't remember ever seeing a movie that came so close to mirroring how we played make-believe as young boys. It's a shame that people missed the genius of it.

If you have watched such a movie as "Ator, the invincible" directed by Joe Damato and you think that was bad(and it was)just wait to watch this. I can assure you that this was twice worse than that. The pace of the movie is always slow as a turtle and the battles are all filmed using slow camera, even when the guy is running sometimes they use the same slow camera, What´s the reason for that? Apart from this, special effects are very cheap and the funniest thing about this disaster is that the plot tries to show Gunan as a kind of Christ antecedent and they even say that his word was later used by a very brave king in Camelot(King Arthur, as you can suppose) so Excalibur was a long time ago the sword of a guy called Gunan, what an interesting revelation... But I prefer not to comment anything more about this turkey, in Spain i think it is impossible to find and if you live in other place and you see it at the video store, just avoid it. I give it a 1, and because I laughed sometimes.