Death Cruise

Seems to me there have been more than enough movies (or episodes on TV shows) wherein a mystery killer picks off a group of people one by one, and then crosses their faces with a big 'X' on a group-photo where everyone is smiling and happy. The theatrical film "The Last of Sheila" used a group-photo as a red herring, but "Death Cruise" doesn't have time for subtlety. It's a telefilm, short on time and short on budget. A would-be "Ten Little Indians", the cast is littered with has-beens (Richard Long), should-have-beens (Edward Albert), and one fresh face (Kate Jackson, giving off some enchanting, mysterious charisma). It's a cross between "The Love Boat" and "Murder, She Wrote", yet it does predate both and was fairly intriguing for its time. Seen today, it's a tacky hoot, although there is a neat twist at the finish line. As TV-movies go: ** from ****

An ocean cruise is set for murder involving several couples, who believe they've won a trip. Unbeknownst to them they've all been lured on the cruise to be murdered by an unknown person.... It is up to Dr. Burke to piece together the clues that connect all these couples together and before more murders occur.

The Love Boat meets And Then There Were None courtesy of Aaron Spelling. Like The Love Boat we have a variety of guests, all couples, who have their problems; jealous gravel-voiced Polly Bergen is married to womaniser Richard Long, a dissatisfied Tom Bosley is married to oblivious Celeste Holm, and the baby-crazy Kate Jackson is married to not-baby-crazy Edward Albert. Doctor-at-large Michael Constantine and captain Cesare Danova fill out the ship's crew.

I sort of guessed who the murderer is, but it's fun getting there. It's light-hearted, but still has some suspense with its air of a calm-before-the storm. Also there's some histrionics from the assortment of characters; It's nicely constructed and ends well with a nice twist.

Every time this movie used to re-air on late night TV in the late 70s and early 80s I would always make time to sit in front of the TV and watch it. To see the lovely Kate Jackson, handsome Richard Long, the "great" Polly Bergen whom I've never seen anywhere else except for this TV movie, the endearing Tom Bosley, and another "great" whom I've never seen outside this movie, Celeste Holme. This is truly the love boat on a cruise to murder and mayhem and boy was it ever good!! And every time I would watch it I would always forget who the real murderer was.

As expected, someone here is already criticizing the movie as if that really is a big help to anyone. This is a great TV movie and worth watching each and every time. I can't say that about half the movies I've seen this month.

If you ever get a chance to watch it on TV someday, which isn't likely, watch it. In light of "The Girl Most Likely To" finally coming out this year on DVD, maybe there's hope for a DVD release of "Death Cruise."

I saw this when I was twelve. It was the movie that made me understand what a good mystery really was. I had read the entire Happy Hollisters children's mystery series and they were about a family of child sleuths who always got their man. But we the readers were not in a position to solve the mystery along with them. This movie showed me that a good mystery is that which makes the viewer/reader, at the end, say, "OH!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!!!"

DEATH CRUISE concerns a group of passengers on the oceanic voyage of the title. With an all-star cast, including 1970's TV luminaries Kate Jackson and Tom Bosley, it seems like a typical episode of LOVE BOAT. That is, until the murders begin!

Have no fear, this is an Aaron Spilling production. So, each pair of celebrity passengers has their own set of soap opera-type issues going on. This gives us some semblance of "character development" before tragedy strikes.

As they're bumped off one by one, someone X-es the victim's face out of a group photo.

An enjoyable, though somewhat soggy yarn. Don't expect TITANIC meets PSYCHO. No, this is more tame than either of those...