Haunted

Gloriously goofy low budget shocker from writer / co-producer / director Michael De Gaetano; it's so laughable so often that one has to believe he basically had his tongue in his cheek the entire time. They also know that when the opening text / exposition makes them laugh, that can be a direct indicator of what's to come. 100 years ago, a proud young Indian woman is framed for theft and sentenced to ride her horse - topless - throughout the desert until she dies. Well, that's somewhat novel, at the least. Then a century later, a lost British lass comes upon an Arizona community where a dysfunctional family resides in a run down old movie studio - a lass who just might be the reincarnation of that long ago Indian woman. Another thing that sets this little movie up quite well right away is the uproarious, overwrought disco theme song "Indian Woman" sung by Billy Vera of "At This Moment" fame. This itself is indicative of the melodrama to come as thuggish Andrew (Aldo Ray) and blind Michelle (Virginia Mayo) reminisce. The two veterans are a total hoot what with their histrionics; Ray completely turns on the intensity and nuttiness as Andrew becomes more and more unhinged - and homicidal - as the story progresses. Meanwhile, Michelle's son Patrick (likable enough Jim Negele) becomes fond of the stranger in town, played by lovely Ann Michelle ("House of Whipcord"). She actually comes off the best, even if her character(s) are very thinly written; she's quite easy to watch (and shows off her breasts for the appreciation of all those watching); Brad Rearden ("Hi- Riders", "The Silent Scream") is stuck with an annoying role as the bratty younger brother Russell. On location filming in Arizona *is* one appreciable asset, as well as a decent music score by Lor Crane, and a pretty enjoyable final act that culminates in an intense full body burn. "Haunted" does work fairly well as an amusing bit of wild 'n' wacky nonsense; De Gaetano does have a good feel for the bizarre, starting with the perfectly silly idea of having a phone booth installed in a cemetery in order to set up one of his most surreal touches. If all of this sounds right up your alley, then by all means dive right in. The movie is absurd but not without some charms. Six out of 10.

In 1865, a young Indian girl (Ann Michelle) is sentenced to death in a small Arizona town after a soldier (Aldo Ray) falsely accuses her of stealing. Fast forward a hundred and eleven years and the town is now a ramshackle old movie studio inhabited solely by two brothers (Jim Negele & Brad Rearden), their blind mother (Virginia Mayo) and crabby Uncle (Ray again). Trouble arrives when Brit actress Jennifer (Michelle again) shows up and she is the Indian girl reincarnated.

Is it possible to title your movie HAUNTED and not have any ghosts in it? This is more boredom beyond than anything else. It really says something for your film when the scariest thing in it is Aldo Ray's hairy back during a lovemaking scene (my eyes!!!). Director Michael DeGaetano previously made the amusingly titled UFO: TARGET EARTH and shows a real fine hand at the nonsensical. There are some bizarre subplots like Ray searching for gold and Ray being the boys real father, both of which are dropped cold. DeGaetano also sets up a senseless bit with a phone booth being installed by a graveyard next to a house so the Indian girl can call Ray from beyond the grave. Huh? Why not just have her call the home phone? The mind numbing finale has our female lead trapped in the phone booth with Ray outside, trying to find a way to get at her. He finally figures out to break the glass. Meanwhile, our hero brothers hang out at a burger joint and don't even show up to save the chick. For Aldo Ray fans (my condolences) only!

"Haunted" starts with a prologue written on the screen and, immediately after, the same text is processed into a sequence as well. It certainly isn't the biggest blunder you can make, but it does somewhat illustrate the intelligence level of the film. Either you do a written text or you do a sequence, but not both. Then again, the pre-opening credit sequences, taking place during the US Civil War, are undeniably the best parts of the entire film.

A beautiful Indian woman gets falsely accused of witchery by a corrupt priest, and she's sentenced to a very strange and perverse death. The poor girl, named Abanaki, is tied to a horse, stripped naked, and then sent into the dry and hot desert to die. Some say - and I quote the prologue - that her spirit roamed around for more than a hundred years for revenge. And guess what happens a hundred years later!

"Haunted" is also the type of clichéd horror film in which characters reincarnate as exact replicas of their ancestors. The corrupt priest reincarnates as a grumpy ranch owner, and Abanaki returns as a beautiful traveling girl whose car breaks down at that same ranch. This film had the potential to be a simple but effective supernatural horror tale, but writer/director Alessandro De Gaetano stuffs his screenplay with lots of senseless nonsense, dead-end twists, dull sub plots, and insignificant supportive characters. There's a phone booth in the middle of a cemetery, sinister wooden statues without any purpose, an elderly blind lady playing the organ and fantasizing about sex with her deceased husband (while she actually has the plump and hairy Aldo Ray on top of her), and two dorky brothers chasing after the lewd Abanaki-reincarnation.

I can tolerate quite a lot of weirdness, but the complete lack of action and gruesome deaths in "Haunted" is unforgivable. There's one notable highlight, involving spilled petrol and a spark from a light bulb, but it's not enough. De Gaetano put too much time and effort in the dedicated soundtrack, and the casting of Anne Michelle (in a successful attempt to find a girl with perfect breasts).

This film was in most video stores during the 80s but hasn't been seen much in the past few years. Though it's no horror classic, it does have a unique flavor. It was filmed in 1976 but only released 3 years later. It's better than most of the many made-for-video horror fests. Haunted is set in a desert ghost town and features great photography. The storyline is about an attractive female visitor to the town who looks just like a woman who was executed in the same area 100 years ago. Haunted is very low budget. There are only about a dozen people in the cast but the film is still competently made and has some eerie moments. It also has some unusual folk songs (in fact,a soundtrack from this movie was released, how many horror movies can say that?) The film's poster is a bit misleading as it shows a person impaled on the letters in the title. However, the film's body count is very low and the blood and guts is almost non-existent. Not that it matters though as the story will keep viewers hooked. Haunted's chief asset is Aldo Ray. Once upon a time, Ray worked in major Hollywood productions but by this time, he was taking any part that was offered. At the start, Ray's character is nasty. He then gets nastier and nastier while the film goes on. By the end, he is really off the deep end. One may wonder if he is acting or going nuts in real life while the scene is being shot! In any event, Haunted is one of the few obscure horror films that is worth your time!

In Arizona during the Civil War, a Native American woman is accused of witchcraft, tied to a horse and left to die in the desert. One hundred years later, the descendants of the woman's accusers start being killed off, and an Englishwoman becomes convinced that she is the reincarnation of a long-dead Indian priestess. This movie was filmed on location in Arizona over a period of 24 days on a budget of $250,000. According to writer-director Michael De Gaetano, budgeting issues necessitated that portions of the script be un-filmed, resulting in "a good deal of the philosophical depth of the film" disappearing. The result is a boring movie with huge gaps in the story, and plenty of historical inaccuracies. This is all topped with some ridiculous performances by a very visibly drunk Aldo Ray and Virginia Mayo' in a non sensical role who chews the scenery and delivers her lines awkwardly. Ann Michelle ( a white British actress) plays the Apache priestess, and sits atop a horse, topless, wearing a black, braided wig. A soundtrack album was released featuring such songs as You Make Me Feel the Music by Carol Douglas, Indian Woman by Billy Vera, A Distant Time (Love Theme from 'Haunted') by Freya Crane, and How Can I Tell Judy by Herbert Oscar Anderson.