The Adventures of Gerard

I saw this movie this morning and I must say it does not deserve one star. I admit, this movie is not exactly a CLASSIC per se but it has its share of funny moments. I'm not much of a fan of OLD movies but this one has charm to it. You have the lovely Claudia Cardinale of 'Once Upon a Time in the West' fame and Eli Wallach in this movie...good cast and an alright movie.

It's supposed to be an adventure/comedy and sees to be more alongside the genre of Comedy more than anything. It's funny but not downright hilarious in parts and the adventure seems more comical than serious.

Eh, not bad. **+/****

I don't think this movie is much to get excited about either but I don't agree that the "easily entertained" are stupid or that they should be "ignored" because of some perception of same, valid or no. I also think that when being dictatorial rather than critical which is the proper tone for a review, one should know the difference in meaning between "fitfully" and "fittingly." When it comes to stupidity, let he who is without etc.... I have seen more than one film which I thought was "stupid" but rarely do I think that people who disagree with my opinion are "stupid" simply because they like something I don't. I am also uncomfortable with the notion that their right to be entertained is predicated on their personal taste.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle introduced Etienne Gerard to readers in 1894. This quixotic, delightful character has since been depicted rather disappointingly, not least in this misjudged mishmash by arty-farty Polish director Jerzy Skolimowski who has turned what the author intended as a satire into an infantile, puerile farce rendered even more ridiculous by the terminally irritating and totally incongruous score of Riz Ortolani.

Skolimowski had at least the good sense to take with him to Italy his fellow countryman Witold Sobocinski, whose camerawork is splendid. Apart from that we have a collection of thespians, some of whom should know better, making utter fools of themselves. The only one who emerges smelling of roses is the glorious Claudia Cardinale. She and Sobocinski at least warrant awarding this ludicrous opus 'deux points'.

It is supremely ironic that the adaptor here, H. A. L. Craig, turned in such an excellent script for the other Napoleonic film of that year 'Waterloo'. Grotesquely ironic is that in Skolimowski's effort the author's son Adrian is billed as 'technical advisor'. I sincerely hope that when seeing the finished film he hung his head in shame. By all accounts Skolimowski himself was disappointed with the result. Quelle surprise!

Should you listen carefully you will hear the sound of Sir Arthur turning in his grave!

The Adventures of Gerard is a somewhat silly romp set during the Napoleonic era featuring that career-went-nowhere semi-sexy Brit Peter McEnery. McEnery is exceptionally handsome in a rakish kind of way -- in this movie, he always looks slightly unclean, like a 1970s porn star, sporting as he does the cheesiest of mustaches. But he keeps a twinkle in his eye, and his physical comedy is well-polished. He has a really nice body from the waist up, but the skinniness of his legs is reinforced by the military uniforms he wears in this movie, which are extraordinarily high-waisted.

McEnery as Gerard plays some kind of messenger, a low-ranking French officer ferrying missives among the regiments of the French army occupying Spain. Hilarity ensues, mostly involving Claudia Cardinale as a sexy Spanish lass doing her best Sophia Loren imitation, with pouty lips and unkempt tresses. At one point, she is (thinly) disguised as a boy, but McEnery sees through her disguise (how could he not?!) and proceeds to seduce her (how could he?!). See what I mean about hilarity ensuing? Spain itself looks like the Old West as envisioned by Sergio Leone. And the movie will win no Oscars for Sound Effects Editing. I swear you can visualize the sound guys clapping coconuts together in the booth, timing their clangings to the fourfold footfalls of the equine cast.

This is a fun film. With its tongue-and-cheek dialog ("The Emperor himself approved my mustache!"), none-too-subtle sex humor, vigorous visual gags, hairbreadth escapes and coincidences, broad stereotypes (the English and their tea! and there is a whole fox-hunting sequence), and the time-honored technique of directly addressing the camera (which is a technique I like, when done well, which it is here), it is a genuine hoot. And McEnery has a subtlety about him. He can do a lot with a twist of his mustache or a raised eyebrow. He does sexy-stupid really well. Look for that all-purpose ethnic Eli Wallach as Napoleon.

Except for the easily entertained, who should always be ignored for their obvious stupidity, this film is a lumbering bore. McEnery is saddled with the hideously written title character who annoys one and all from the first scene to the last. He is that old standby: the oblivious vainglorious military schmuck. The adventures he engages in are more like antics, with lots of frantic activity in a vain attempt to provide humor. But Gerard is such an unwavering clod that he becomes tiresome very quickly, yet you're stuck with him until the end of this fiasco (that is if you decide to keep watching). Cardinale is quite fetching, as always, and Wallach tries as Napoleon, but the script lets them all down. The story is some dull nonsense about Napoleon in need of an idiot officer to bring a false dispatch to the enemy to wreak havoc. Gerard gets the thankless job but becomes an unexpected hero as the story unwinds. Quite predictable. It all takes place during Napoleon's war in Spain, but this is NOT something to look at if you're a fan of the 'Sharpe' series by Cornwell that takes place in the same venue. This film was barely released, deservedly, and remains fitfully buried to this day. Hopefully no where near Conan Doyle's final resting place.