The Green Slime

There isn't a single Japanese actor in this big-budget Japanese produced sci-fi drama, but the special effects are a dead give-away. A wandering astroid (code named `Flora') is on a collision course with Earth. Richard Jackel and Robert Horton lead a team which places atomic bombs on the astroid to blow it up. They succeed, but they unwittingly bring back an alien fungus to their wheel-shaped space station. The fungus grows into man-sized monsters which multiply rapidly and overrun the space station. Jackel and Horton are forced to set aside their romantic rivalry over Luciana Paluzzi (`Thunderball') while they battle the creatures. Blazing laser guns abound in a desperate battle with the unstoppable monsters! The astronauts even don spacesuits and jet-packs for a battle on the space station's hull. All this in glorious color AND wide screen. Wow!

Sure, this sounds great but . . . well, these guys didn't know what they were doing. Or did they?

`The Green Slime' looks more like a clever satire of sci-fi movies than an ineptly made film. The odds against all the side-splitting humor in this movie happening by accident must be astronomical. The potato-shaped monster suits are hysterical. The miniatures of the rockets are so tiny the camera can barely focus on them. The dialogue sounds like perfect parodies of sci-fi's most treasured clichés. (Example: The doctor rushes up to soldiers as their about to attack a slim monster. `Stop, don't kill it!' he pleads. `This is a magnificent discovery, and we must do everything possible to SAVE it!' -- and he says it in a perfect imitation of Richard Nixon.)

When the heroes' rocket tries to outrun an atomic blast, Robert Horton orders the pilot to increase thrust. But the G-forces are already so strong, the pilot can't lift his hand to reach the throttle. Macho Robert jumps up, walks to the pilot's chair, and pushes the throttle himself!

`The Green Slime' is so full of scenes like this that it should be re-released as `National Lampoon's Space Adventure'. And just wait until you hear the Jimmy Hendrix sound-alike title theme, a psychedelic rock tune. Its was even released on 45 rpm! (That's kinda like a CD, for those of you too young to remember.)

Rent the movie, call your friends, and mix up a batch of lime Jello as a snack. This is MST3K squared.

You have to love a sci-fi movie that:

1) Is a Japanese-produced product featuring a mostly-Anglo cast (saves on dubbing cost).

2) Has equivalent special effects of any given "Godzilla" movie.

3) Has Italian bombshells named "Sheila Benson".

4) Gives you slime creatures that look like Sigmund the Sea Monster.

5) Has a mad doctor (isn't that a pre-requisite for these movies? Thought so.).

6) Has one of the all-time coolest title songs I have ever heard in my entire natural life.

If you watch "The Green Slime", just think: if Jaeckel had brought the rest of his "Dirty Dozen" cronies along with him, the Green Slime would never have stood a chance.

Oh well....

Seven stars. By the way, does anyone know where to get this movie's soundtrack? I have GOT to get that song....

Before you can say, "Sock it to me!" a giant asteroid is on a collision course with Earth. Ivan Reiner, Kinji Fukasaku and the gang get western TV star Robert Horton (as Jack Rankin) to command a mission dealing with the problem. He clashes with future "Oscar" nominated site commander Richard Jaeckel (as Vince Elliott). These two "Gamma 3" rivals both dig luscious doctor Luciana Paluzzi (as Lisa Benson). They decide to land one of their groovy spaceships on the giant rock and lay down some explosives. The mission gets a little hairy, but winds up successful. But the team has inadvertently picked up "The Green Slime" - a bubbly mess that grows into energy eating beasts even "Mr. Clean" can't wipe up!

****** The Green Slime (12/19/68) Kinji Fukasaku ~ Robert Horton, Richard Jaeckel, Luciana Paluzzi, Ted Gunther

With a title like "The Green Slime", your expectations for this film are certainly not going to be great. However, despite many knocks against the film other than the title, the overall effort is surprisingly watchable.

The film stars mostly American actors, though it was filmed in Japan and it shows. The sets and rockets are very reminiscent of those you might see in Japanese sci-fi films and Godzilla-type films. This isn't necessarily bad, as for this style of film it is one of the better ones. However, considering that in the US, 2001 was being released as well, then THE GREEN SLIME's special efforts really look shabby in comparison. I am sure that the folks that made this film felt much the same way and cursed 2001's brilliant special effects!

As for the plot, this is generally the best thing about this sci-fi film. The idea of a small and seemingly insignificant organism growing rapidly and taking over a space station is interesting and is reminiscent of movies such as THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN. I am sure that the folks at NASA were also seriously worried about such possibilities. I liked this idea, but unfortunately making this growing green menace look menacing and credible was tough--and the folks who made this film didn't even come close! The green glop morphed into silly looking creatures that looked a lot like the sea monster from "Sigmund and the Sea Monster"! I think if they'd just kept the green slime in the form of a rapidly spreading slime instead of silly electricity-spouting semi-humanoids it would have played out better.

So the overall effort has a lot of cheese as well as a few dumb performances (such as the doctor who needlessly gets himself killed and Richard Jaekel's very inconsistent character) but there is also a bit of charm about it, as this was kind of the last gasp for the 1950s style sci-fi yarn. Now, thanks to better special effects and audiences that expected more, films like THE GREEN SLIME were a dying breed.

By the way, you may recognize the female lead, Luciana Paluzzi. She was one of the Bond villains from THUNDERBALL and she was never lovelier.

I have a special attachment to this film: I was stationed in the Air Force in Japan in 1968 when this was filmed. Most of the cast (with the exception of course of the "name" actors) were U.S. Military personnel or dependents. Bud Widom was an announcer on Armed Forces Radio in Tokyo, and Ann Ault (nurse) directed our theater group (The Kanto Players). She directed me as Dr. Bradley in "The Man Who Came to Dinner". Ann also had a a great voice and appeared as a headliner at the Tokyo Hilton. For the earlier comment, Green Slime HAS been shown on MS3TK. It was, I think, made for it, even though MS3TK was just a dream at the time.