Gli amori di Ercole

In THE LOVES OF HERCULES, the titular titan (Mickey Hargitay) is vengeful after his wife is murdered. Herc goes on a quest that includes great tests of strength and feats of derring-do, complete with his toting of an enormous tree as if it was a toothpick, as well as senseless cattle slaughter.

Soon, Queen Deianira (Jayne Mansfield!) falls hopelessly in love with the big lug. A lot of time passes with no real action, though the mighty, shirtless one does glisten like a rotisserie chicken in the sun!

Then, Big H gets a chance to battle the hydra, which looks like a Rose Bowl parade float. He also gets captured by amazons, who look even better in mini-skirts than he does, though their cockatoo headdresses remain a mystery.

This isn't one of the more dynamic of its sub-genre. It mostly exists as an excuse to show off the physical attributes of Hunkules and Ms. Mansfield. So, don't expect a scintillating story line...

Perfectly awful peplum/Hercules-movie: you know you're in trouble when leading lady Jayne Mansfield's prominent bust (forever on the verge of bursting through her togas) commands greater attention than the plot, the action or the special effects!; of course, the fact that the muscular hero is played by her real-life husband – Mickey Hargitay – adds to the fun quotient (of the unintentional kind, that is)…for rarely has there ever been an actor so clueless as to how to approach this mythical part!

Usually seen as a blonde, Mansfield here dons a black and a red wig: she appears as a couple of sovereigns – the heroine and an Amazonian (though the latter is technically played by another actress who takes up Mansfield's appearance via a magic potion in order to ensnare Hargitay). Of mild interest is the fact that the latter has a penchant of disposing of her lovers by having them turned into living trees – as if one needed further proof of how wooden this thing could be, the plot here takes it to a literal level! The chief villainous role in this one is entrusted to Massimo Serato, often a reliable presence in this type of flick, but in this case sporting long curly hair – which only serves to enhance the film's overriding camp factor. Also in the cast, as one of Serato's advisors, is Giulio Donnini from the obscure peplum FRINE, CORTIGIANA D'ORIENTE (1953) – which I watched as part of last month's "Epic Movie Challenge" (in time for the Easter period); incidentally, I had intended to rent the 5-Disc/7-Film set among which this was included back then but it wasn't available.

By the way, THE LOVES OF HERCULES was also known as HERCULES VS. THE HYDRA: this monster, which appears fairly early on in the game, is one of the worst of its kind ever constructed – what's the point of having a three-headed menace if lopping one of them off kills it instantly! Indeed, the mechanical creation is so bulky that it can barely move and so obviously fake that one is liable to burst out laughing at the mere sight of it, as I did, thus effectively destroying the illusion of the entire scene! Another hilarious obstacle the hero has to overcome during the course of the film is a meek-looking cow absurdly sprayed black by the penny-pinching film-makers in a lousy attempt to pass it off for a menacing bull!

The totally rare Danish videorelease of this "trashy" film is full screen running 96.00 mins precisely. Italian tv channel RaiUno showed a letterboxed print(1: 1.70 cirka) the other day running ½ a minnute shorter. The 2 versions features a whole bunch of scenes filmed from different/alternative angles and many are diff/alternative takes. Quite "interesting" to compare actually...if you are into this sort of movie-watching. One scene found only in the Danish version shows Miss mansfield (hidden behind some see-through cloth)covering her naked body with some clothes. Extremely...uuhuuhhh...daring!!!!! I give it 5 out of 10.....but "reflecting" on it afterwards is worth a good laugh and....10 !!! Cheers sandal-genre comrades!!!

"The Loves of Hercules" was one of two peplum films featuring Hercules (the other being "Goliath and the Dragon") released in 1960, following the success of "Hercules" and its sequel both starring Steve Reeves. This marks American sex-symbol/actress Jayne Mansfield's only peplum entry, because, I guess, what to do when you have a hunky slab of bodybuilder beef lying around the house but cast him as the legendary strongman and play his main squeeze? It's a good idea on paper.

Mansfield and Hungarian bodybuilder Mickey Hargitay married in 1956 and this was the second film they made together. Both have been better elsewhere, but let's face it, their most enduring and worthwhile contribution to the performing arts was producing daughter Mariska. It certainly isn't this turkey, which sees Herc buffeted by a succession of women who do him wrong. Indeed, the theme here seems to be that musclemen should stick to slaying monsters and performing heroic feats because women will just mess with you. Hargitay, despite his build, is not very convincing in the role -- he has a round, boyish face that in this context makes him look more like a lost and confused lad than a god among men. Mansfield's performance is too self-absorbed and anachronistic to be anything but distracting. She has a dual role as the good Queen Deianira and the evil Queen Hippolyta and neither Hercules nor viewers can tell them apart. (Hint: her hair color changes.) Oddly, the two real life partners have no on-screen chemistry here.

None of the rest of the cast are particularly interesting, the set pieces are unremarkable, as are the set design and costumes. The tree-monsters the Amazons transform men into are a little spooky, and the large cast of extras look like they are having fun. Despite being filmed at Cinecitta, this looks as cheap as it probably was -- especially the monsters Hercules battles, which includes the paperiest of paper mache Hydras and an emaciated looking gorilla suit. The only energetic fight sequence is when Hargitay dispatches Mansfield's blowhard fiancé by picking him up, spinning him around a bit and throwing him across the room. This is the only moment the film manages to sell the idea that you shouldn't tangle with Hercules. This is only for Hercules and/or Mansfield or Hargitay completists -- everyone else can skip it.

The film begins with Hercules returning home after some time--only to discover that his lady love is dead as are just about everyone! It seems that the evil King of Ecalia and his armies are responsible and it's up to our hero to kick butt and right wrongs.

The fact that "The Loves of Hercules" was a terrible film should have come as no major surprise for me, as every Hercules/Maciste film I have ever seen from Italy have been rather bad. In the late 50s to about the mid-1960s, the Italian film industry produced a ton of these films. Most starred some foreigner (such as Steve Reeves, though there were GOBS of others, such as Peter Lupus and Mark Forest) and had otherwise all-Italian casts--with generally lousy dubbing in the English language versions I've seen. So why did I watch this bad film? Well, curiosity. I was curious to see the stars--Mickey Hargitay and his then wife, Jayne Mansfield. Mansfield plays two characters and Hargitay plays Hercules.

So what did I like about the film? Well, Miss Mansfield looked nice. I particularly liked seeing her in a brown wig for a change of pace. Now you know it's bad when this is the only thing I really liked! The acting was stilted, the plot was quite boring and for an epic, it sure was amazingly small and non-epic! Overall, it's no better or worse than any of the other films of the genre--which isn't saying much. My advice is see a couple, then you've pretty much seen them all. And, if you want to see the most enjoyable of these, see the much later film "Hercules in New York" (with Arnold Schwarzenegger). It is so incredibly bad that it's actually a lot of fun to watch! As for "The Loves of Hercules", it's forgettable and dumb--no more, no less.