Muscle Beach Party

Despite it's title, "Muscle Beach Party" is a pretty weak entry in Beach Party series. This time around, Frankie, Annette and the gang battle with a group of Muscle men led by their trainer, Don Rickles. All the while, an Italian Countess is trying to steal Frankie from Annette. Unlike the others in the series, "Muscle Beach Party" seems to have an overall negative tone. Every character seems angry at somebody. Most of the film's good moments belong to Buddy Hackett. Harvey Lembeck as Eric Von Zipper isn't around this time and he is missed.

This Beach movie actually tells a story, asking the question - would Frankie be happier surfing all over the world as the singing protégé of a rich woman who wasn't Dee-Dee? But don't worry - it's conveyed in short snatches of hipster-y dialog ("Solid-gold surf boards don't float too well!") between songs, hijinx, and some well-edited surfing footage.

Enjoy the "leisurely" pace - footage of the kids' cars arriving at the beach, establishing shots of the beach at night, even the kids settling in for a night of sleeping and no hanky-panky... (Frankie doesn't believe it, either.) Annette gets another good slow song - which, unfortunately, Frankie also decides to sing later on. Frankie's fast song is better,and Stevie Wonder sings a joyful "Happy Street". (And then sings it again in the closing credits.) I just wish Dick Dale had done a guitar solo instead of singing..

Buddy Hackett is a lot of fun, but also gets a poignant point-making monologue at the end. Peter Lorre does one of the better end-of-the-movie cameos as "the Boss," and there's the usual turns by Don Rickles and Morey Amsterdam. For the ladies, there's a line of genuine California beach muscle-men, including future "Grizzly Adams" star Dan Haggerty. (He jiggles his chest muscles and whistles!)

And I think Annette is actually wearing a two-piece!

Despite lots of musclemen in the supporting cast, "Muscle Beach Party" could maybe use some steroids. The first follow-up to "Beach Party" is a bit lackluster and talky, and the pacing drags. Frankie (Frankie Avalon) and Dee Dee (Annette Funicello, no longer 'Dolores') feud over another woman who's out to snare the cocky surfer-boy (when Dee Dee tells Frankie how selfish he is and that all he ever does is 'take', the movie touches on some surprisingly prickly teen emotions). But the witty lines and funny repartee of "Beach Party" have mostly been replaced by wan slapstick and too many characters (and too much of Don Rickles). Candy Johnson does her version of dancing ("Man, she's really got the power!"), "Little" Stevie Wonder sings "Happy Street", and the surfing footage is fun, but Harvey Lembeck's Eric Von Zipper is AWOL (there wasn't room for him, what with Luciana Paluzzi as a millionairess, Buddy Hackett as her manager, and a dozen musclemen lining the beach). Annette is lovely singing forlornly as Frankie paddles out to sea, but she's far too patient with him (in one scene alone, he makes up with her, then drops her, then makes up again!). Not the strongest entry in the series, but with a few colorful compensations. **1/2 from ****

I wouldn't think you could go far wrong with both Don Rickles and Buddy Hackett, but I was mistaken. Rickles plays an unfunny coach who never gets any laughs while he works with a group of oily muscle men (that may be your thing; it's not mine). Hackett (whom I don't believe I've ever seen looking so trim and normal) is no more than the aide to a rich heiress (Luciana Paluzzi) who sets her sights on Frankie Avalon, much to the disapproval of his girl Annette Funicello. All the vignettes going on herein are disjointed and tiresome, and Candy Johnson (who reminds me of a young Polly Holiday from the ALICE TV series) isn't as alluring as she thinks she is when regularly shaking her booty and causing men to freeze-frame and fall off their surfboards... and not even having the indecency to wear a bikini while doing it. John Ashley is present too. Don't ask me what the point of having Morey Amsterdam in this mess was. Peter Lorre pops in for a short time in a humorous cameo, and at the end we get to enjoy the very young Little Stevie Wonder do his stuff, but it's not enough. It's not very often you can say the end credits sequence is the best thing about a film, but that was the case here. *1/2 out of ****

Perhaps unappreciated in its time, William Asher's 1964 saga about the tribulations of living jobless and care-free on California's sunny coast, surfing whenever "Surf's up," and dancing for no apparent reason at all (whether it be on the beach or in some restaurant), really captures teen angst during the sixties. Frankie Avalon shines as "Frankie," the glossy-haired, young, ambitious, and maybe a little naive, leader of the beach gang. His counterpart, "Dee Dee," played by Annette Funicello, gave an Oscar-caliber performance. Through a heartbreaking scene that opens with Frankie surfing at night, Dee Dee loses Frankie to an older, richer woman. During the entire film, when I wasn't laughing hysterically at the shear absurdity or chuckling over the image of a producer actually signing on to such golden garbage, I was cheering for Annette. Why Frankie ever decided to ditch his one true love is a mystery. Also noteworthy is Don Rickles' performance as a man-breeder, Buddy Hackett's role as the sensible accountant, and an introductory appearance by "Little" Stevie Wonder. This film comes highly recommended.