The Flesh Eaters

If you are going to sit down to watch this expecting some top notch special effects, intense acting, and a character driven plot, you deserve to be disappointed. Movies like this cannot conceal what they are or mislead people, so to criticize it for being cheap, hokey, and cheesy is sort like complaining that Star Wars takes place in outer space.

If you are hoping to be entertained, then this movie won't let you down! A reminder of how creepy these old movies can be if you were lucky enough to see it when you were under age 12, movies like this always benefit most when the viewer can suspend their cynicism and imagine they are 10 years old. The lack of any sets used in the film is probably because the actors chewed all the scenery, the gore, for its time, was pretty darn shocking, and the monsters are somehow easily destroyed by the same thing they eat.

Yes, skeletons shouldn't remain whole when the flesh is eaten off them. True, CGI effects blow away the lousy FX. Of course, a woman wouldn't tear off her shirt while the men stood by, still in their shirts and gawking when someone needed makeshift bandages. And I agree, Nazi scientists were not hiding out on Long Island in the 1960's. If you can accept these facts, and forgive the movie in spite of them (and many, many other similar flaws), you won't be let down for one second! Also, the song playing on the transistor radio in the opening scene, performed by a band called "The Teen Killers" is so catchy you won't stop whistling it for weeks!!!

This movie made a major impression on me when I was a kid and turned on the TV halfway though it on a Saturday afternoon. It was right in the middle of the scene where the archetypical cartoon beatnik character is babbling moronically about his diet...within seconds, I was watching a grown man scream like a little girl while being literally devoured from the inside out. That's all I remember from back then, that and how uncommonly UGLY those monsters turned out to be. I mean HIDEOUS (I'm still convinced that the brain-bug in "Starship Troopers" is just a watered down version of these things).

Later I watched it again, and again.

They start out really small, the monsters, so small that you can't see them except as a swarm. They are electrified somehow--electrified carnivorous blood cells, I think, the result of an evil Nazi experiment--and just sort of twinkle at first.

At the end, one gets really, really big. Once they're big enough to see, you realize just how UGLY these things are. These are old-school special effects, the kind that required some EFFORT, even when they were bad, and I miss that.

To add to this, you have a stranded island-load of the most ridiculous, archetypical, two-dimensional characters saying and doing the dumbest things imaginable. A mad Nazi scientist, a drunken has-been movie starlet, a once-successful pilot with a dark incident that ruined his life, and the aforementioned cartoon beatnik. It's like ten bad movies rolled into one. I'm not even convinced it's unintenionally funny. I imagine the people behind this debacle were made jaded and cynical by their hardships in Hollywood and amused themselves during the filming of this hack work by at least making it fun. My favorite part is when the square jawed pilot asks for something to bandage a wound with, and of course the attractive young women immediately rips her shirt off.

Bad special effects, bad writing, bad acting, and, I'm telling you, the ugliest monster I've ever seen. If this doesn't sound good to you, don't rent it, and stay away from my house.

Truth to tell, I had not heard of this movie until recently, but after reading several laudatory reviews in various film books, and after hearing a coworker buddy of mine rave about it, I quickly put it at the very top of my list of films to rent. And boy, am I ever glad I did! "The Flesh Eaters" (1964), as it turns out, is nothing less than a horror minimasterpiece; a genuine sleeper whose relative obscurity may soon change, thanks to this crisp-looking DVD from the fine folks at Dark Sky. In it, an alcoholic actress, her hotty blonde assistant and their hunky-dude plane pilot are forced to land on a barren island near NY's Long Island, right before a hurricane. There, they encounter a scientist played by Martin Kosleck, who is working with the teensy critters that give this film its name. Kosleck, a German Jew who nonetheless excelled at portraying weasly Nazi types throughout the '40s, is superb in the lead role, but then again, all the actors in this film are surprisingly fine. The film also boasts beautiful, high-contrast B&W photography, utilizing bizarre camera angles and point-of-view shots; some highly effective gross-out scenes; and some truly original-looking monsters, both large and small. The film gets wilder and wilder as it proceeds,and offers some real surprises toward the end. Thus, this little independent shocker is just dynamite, and a real find for the jaded horror fan. It's also suitable for the kiddies...say, from 10 and up. It'll warp them a little, but they won't soon forget it, and will probably rave about it to THEIR coworkers one day...

Shucks, if you're looking for credibility and good acting, of =course= this is the wrong kind of movie! Myself, I watch a film like "The Flesh Eaters" precisely because it is implausible, even cruddy, and chock-full of overripe performances ... and further, of those delicious moments that "a serious film" or "a Hollywood moom pitcher" would never dare attempt.

And Martin Kosleck is always fun to watch. Check out his mini-bio and see if he doesn't deserve your immediate respect, even if he spent most of his U.S. career acting in junk.

A pilot, a drunken actress and her female assistant, and a groovy beatnik all get stranded on an island where a German scientist (Martin Kosleck) is conducting experiments involving a strange silvery substance in the water that starts eating the flesh off fish and people. This is a cheaply made film that was shot in Montauk, New York, and saves a lot of money by taking place entirely on the beach (their "island"). But it's still fun and manages to overcome its limitations, and Kosleck makes for a good sneaky villain. The hero pilot (Grant Murdock) is pretty poor as an actor, and provides some laughs and funny lines. The beatnik character is a show in himself, man. Can you feel the love? **1/2 out of ****