- Ned Lovett: How would you like it if I told you your Mexican divorce is no good.
- Chick Bean: Yesterday you told me it was good.
- Ned Lovett: Yeh, but that was yesterday. Today's Friday. Here's a wire that I just received from your first wife's lawyer in New York. Scan it, my boy, scan it.
- Chick Bean: Please arrest the bigamist. Oh, now, wait, look. Now, you know that isn't right. Now, she calls me a bigamist.
- Ned Lovett: Yes now and that's what you are a bigamist. You married twice didn't you?
- Chick Bean: Yeh.
- Ned Lovett: Well, that proves it. For of all the fools, you are the bigamist.
- Ned Lovett: What's funny about it? What's funny about it? I might be a bandit.
- General Ravinoff: But you're a lawyer!
- Ned Lovett: There's not much difference.
- Chick Bean: Ain't she a peach?
- Ned Lovett: She who? What are you talking about?
- Chick Bean: The blonde that just passed!
- Ned Lovett: The blonde?
- Chick Bean: Yeah.
- Ned Lovett: No blonde passed me, boy, you ought to know better than that.
- Chick Bean: Hey, you mean to say there isn't a girl standing over there?
- Ned Lovett: Certainly there's no girl standing over there.
- Chick Bean: Don't tell me its just that drink.
- Ned Lovett: Yeah, you're drunk.
- Ned Lovett: Oh, you're silly.
- Ned Lovett: Oh, are you drunk.
- Chick Bean: Oh, you make me mad, you do. Of course there's a girl there. But, Ned, hey, she shouldn't take off her clothes, not here.
- Ned Lovett: Give me a drink of that stuff.
- Rita Ferguson: Of course I trust you.
- Captain Jim Stewart: And you promise that someday maybe...
- Rita Ferguson: Someday maybe, I'm going to be your chain and ball.
- Captain Jim Stewart: You mean ball and chain.
- Rita Ferguson: Oh, yes. That's what I mean.
- Captain Jim Stewart: Oh, you darling.
- Rita Ferguson: Oh, listen, you cannot make love to me out here.
- Captain Jim Stewart: Why not?
- Rita Ferguson: There are too many people.
- Captain Jim Stewart: Oh, Rita, I'm just dying to take you in my arms.
- Rita Ferguson: Well, you can waltz with me.
- Chick Bean: And today I'm starting 50 years of billing and cooing.
- Ned Lovett: Listen, my boy, and let me set you straight. The cooing stops when the honeymoon is over, but the billing goes on forever.
- Ned Lovett, Chick Bean: ...
- Ned Lovett: Well, when did you get married?
- Chick Bean: About 15 minutes ago, and I'm still happy.